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Epikouros

Offline (the 09/17/2014 at 11:56am) | Search for a member

Epikouros

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 25 January 1971 (43 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 14545
  • Number of comments : 1196
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About Epikouros : Today, I noticed my ear-raping Rebecca Black parody on Youtube has more views than all of my intellectual blog posts since 2004 put together. FML

That's when I stopped blogging and started hanging out on FML.

My favorite commenters are NoorFML, DocBastard, perdix, DjeePee, nerdsgetmehot, Baustigt, Enslaved, The_A_Teen, ElenasBrazilian and Doortje.

Epikouros's page activity

Visits<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 12:34am<b>TheCutestLizard</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 7:18am<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 3:08pm<b>SHAMUS_the_WITTY</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 10:05am<b>Enslaved</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 3:02am<b>SampleSext</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 12:18am<b>taintedtruffle</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 10:22pm<b>chubbychick</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 9:55am<b>ejkst19</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 9:35am<b>madisonn678</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 11:35pm<b>hduebdo</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 10:13am<b>maxx1222</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 11:43am<b>urdirtyolduncle</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 9:41pm<b>RavingHaven</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 8:15am<b>more4me</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 3:51am<b>juststephhere</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 4:57pm<b>NickyB85</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 9:01am<b>kitkat1399</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 11:47pm

Epikouros's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

See all of Epikouros's badges

Epikouros's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my dad if he'd like to see the photos of my wedding, which he didn't bother to come to. Reply: "What the fuck, are you gay or something? Keep that homo stuff to yourself." My wife started laughing so hard she was crying. FML

#21180887
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45394) - you deserved it (4716)

On 06/19/2014 at 5:05pm - love - by Fuck you, Dad. Fuck you. (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my laziness reached an all-time high. I had a dream that I was at school and had spilled all the contents of my backpack onto the floor. I then purposely shook myself out of my sleep to avoid cleaning up the mess in my dream. FML

#21176688
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44033) - you deserved it (9925)

On 06/16/2014 at 12:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up screaming like a little bitch. I'd been having a bizarre dream where I was having sex with Homer Simpson, when he suddenly had a heart attack and fell on me, crushing me to death. I think my brain needs a douching. FML

#21171240
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46668) - you deserved it (7006)

On 06/11/2014 at 6:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I had to go to the police station after my son got arrested for shoplifting 15 packs of gum. He got away with it at first, but got busted when he tried to return it all because he "didn't like the flavor". FML

#21170087
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49406) - you deserved it (8231)

On 06/10/2014 at 8:39pm - kids - by idiotson - United States (New York)

Today, I sent my girlfriend a request to confirm our relationship on Facebook. She accepted, then changed her screen name into "His Hand". FML

#21169063
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51709) - you deserved it (11300)

On 06/10/2014 at 12:02am - love - by MiserableMan (man) - Vietnam (Ho Chi Minh)

Today, some pig slapped my ass as he passed me in the street, then looked back at me with a dirty grin. His grin turned to horror when he realized that I'm actually a guy, then to anger as he bitched me out for "tricking" him by "looking like a chick". FML

#21167190
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57531) - you deserved it (6931)

On 06/08/2014 at 2:32pm - misc - by 404: sense not found (man) - United States (California)

Today, at college, I was frantically trying to finish an essay on gay rights that was due less than an hour later. In the end I failed, because the college internet filters kept classifying every single page containing the information I needed as "sex", and blocked it all. FML

#21166210
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37539) - you deserved it (13318)

On 06/07/2014 at 3:16pm - work - by fstfckd (man) - United States

Today, a coworker asked me why this week's report was not uploaded to the server. I've been writing these reports once a week for a year and they take a whole day to write. Upload them to what server? FML

#21162641
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37416) - you deserved it (5698)

On 06/04/2014 at 9:56am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got to explain to someone that "enjoying the warm, rich aromas of fecal matter" is not a good subject to use as an ice breaker for making friends. FML

#21161981
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35073) - you deserved it (4297)

On 06/03/2014 at 6:51pm - misc - by Aether - United States (Texas)

Today, my neighbor threatened to call the cops if I didn't turn the volume down on my porno. I was only watching women's tennis. FML

#21157299
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41460) - you deserved it (4757)

On 05/30/2014 at 4:07pm - misc - by Mem (woman) - Sweden (Gavleborgs Lan)

Today, my mother told me that I was "made" in the bathroom of the store I work at now. She even pointed out which stall. FML

#21155045
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54766) - you deserved it (4911)

On 05/28/2014 at 7:08pm - intimacy - by wow - United States (Florida)

Today, I told my girlfriend that I love her. She panicked and blurted out our S&M safeword. FML

#21152151
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47751) - you deserved it (6589)

On 05/26/2014 at 11:53am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my friend announced that she'd lost weight recently. As I was congratulating her, my baby sister said, "I think you're still fat but that's good because you can give more meat to God when you go to heaven." Now I have to explain to a 6-year-old that God isn't a cannibal. FML

#21152005
11 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45937) - you deserved it (5310)

On 05/26/2014 at 7:37am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wolverhampton)

Today, I woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn. FML

#21147237
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47021) - you deserved it (4030)

On 05/21/2014 at 12:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I took my son to lunch. After we ate, the waitress came over and told me that my son was the most well-behaved child they had ever had there. His response was to pull his pants down and moon the entire restaurant while smacking his bottom. FML



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