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Epikouros

Offline (the 02/09/2014 at 2:26am) | Search for a member

Epikouros

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 25 January 1971 (43 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 10075
  • Number of comments : 1185
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About Epikouros : Today, I noticed my ear-raping Rebecca Black parody on Youtube has more views than all of my intellectual blog posts since 2004 put together. FML

That's when I stopped blogging and started hanging out on FML.

My favorite commenters are NoorFML, DocBastard, perdix, DjeePee, nerdsgetmehot, Baustigt, Enslaved, The_A_Teen, ElenasBrazilian and Doortje.

Epikouros's page activity

Visits<b>Itsjustaphase</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 5:40am<b>teotsi</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 10:45am<b>umerin</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 9:09am<b>Life_is_FML</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 12:54pm<b>Aquaman911</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 2:48pm<b>Cherryta</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 10:38pm<b>bakinbacon</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 5:03pm<b>Hoaho4</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 4:11am<b>kungfuzoey</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 11:31pm<b>Bluebl4ze</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 3:20am<b>stormzilla993</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 12:26am<b>pete9913</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 2:12pm<b>Kah1on</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 12:17pm<b>wGx14</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 1:05pm<b>tazmanmike2013</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 6:37am<b>Juicylicious94</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 8:38am<b>raphanne</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 7:46am<b>FMLMaximus</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 12:15am

Epikouros's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

See all of Epikouros's badges

Epikouros's favorite FMLs

Today, my band informed me that our gig this afternoon was actually a wedding. Whose wedding? My ex-wife's, along with the guy she cheated on me with. For their first dance, I had to sing what used to be our song. FML

#20844435
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75549) - you deserved it (4214)

On 08/19/2013 at 9:06am - love - by Love stinks (man) - United States

Today, after a long and stressful day, I started fooling around with my boyfriend. When we finally got to the main event, I found out that we couldn't, because he'd used all his condoms to make water balloons. FML

#20842045
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50547) - you deserved it (6624)

On 08/17/2013 at 6:56pm - intimacy - by frustrated - Ireland (Kerry)

Today, I discovered I have epilepsy. 10 years ago, I told my mother about my frequent fits of vertigo, deja vu, nausea, flashes of memory and strange sounds, smells, and images, coupled with an other-worldly feeling. I thought they were holy visions. So did she. FML

Today, my 7-year-old son proudly announced that he had laid an egg during the night. I checked. He'd simply shat the bed. FML

#20835170
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47825) - you deserved it (3782) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/13/2013 at 4:49am - kids - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, my superior gave me a box of ethernet cables which were previously attached to mainframes storing classified data. He requested I cut them in half so that the residual data would leak out. Not only does this guy make twice my salary, there was no convincing him otherwise. We cut them up. FML

Today, I asked my girlfriend if she had ever broken up with anyone. She said, "Yes. You." and walked off. FML

#20833166
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48669) - you deserved it (5977)

On 08/12/2013 at 12:49am - love - by WTF? (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my girlfriend texted me "I think we should move in". Then, ten seconds later she sent another text that said, "Sorry, typo. Move on". FML

Today, after swimming in the pool, I went into the shower. Little did I know that my niece was hiding in there. She excitedly yelled "I saw your boobs!" Now my nephew won't stop crying because he didn't get to see them as well. FML

#20831181
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49599) - you deserved it (3934)

On 08/10/2013 at 8:04pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, out of partying reflex, I downed Communion wine like a vodka shot. FML

#20830409
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22748) - you deserved it (44007)

On 08/10/2013 at 6:05am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I noticed that my new shampoo had an unfamiliar pink color to it. After some investigation, I found a dead mouse that had apparently cut itself on the bottle pump. I've been washing my hair with mouse blood. FML

#20825465
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56045) - you deserved it (4905)

On 08/07/2013 at 12:34pm - misc - by shampoomice (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my son told his 8-year-old sister that since she swallowed an apple seed, that a tree is going to grow in her stomach and kill her. She's inconsolable and won't believe that she'll be fine, because "they say that to all the dying people on TV". FML

#20817414
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43408) - you deserved it (3886)

On 08/02/2013 at 5:54pm - kids - by ulisha5 (woman) - Bulgaria (Burgas)

Today, I was buying ingredients for a salad. I had only picked up a few cucumbers, when an elderly lady came up to me and murmured, "Make sure you use lots of lube, or that'll hurt. Been there, sweetheart." What the HELL? FML

#20817265
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56653) - you deserved it (5503)

On 08/02/2013 at 4:23pm - misc - by um... what the fuck, miss? (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I went out and met somebody. We got talking and we both realized we are each the ideal romantic partner for the other. The only problem is we are both straight men. FML

#20809215
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49951) - you deserved it (7411)

On 07/29/2013 at 2:35am - love - by confusedmofo - Indonesia

Today, I was babysitting a kid for the first time. She asked if she could watch a movie, so I downloaded Cinderella for her. An hour later, this 10-year-old girl was lecturing me about unrealistic standards of beauty and abusive relationships, and how I suck for liking the movie. FML

#20806393
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44513) - you deserved it (7876)

On 07/27/2013 at 1:51pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Finland

Today, my phone went off, reminding me to take my birth control. Instead of vibrating as per usual, it rang. The ringtone had been changed to my boyfriend singing "It's birth control time, birth control time, take your pill, or I'll say it ain't mine." I was sitting in a quiet waiting room. FML

#20805312
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56027) - you deserved it (9298)

On 07/26/2013 at 9:14pm - misc - by turning red - United States



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