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Eorlas

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Eorlas
  • Town/Country : Storrs, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 20 December 1991 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 1505
  • Number of comments : 214
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Eorlas : Im usually on this website quite frequently. Send me a message if you wish! I enjoy talking to cool people.

When Im not here Im either working at the hospital, practicing/competing/teaching ballroom dance, playing video games, or hanging out with friends.

Eorlas's last visitors

MisterCrossswampbaby985ILoveMyIpad1234CallMeWindSockLindsey_MarieFindingYujinOctober3461miss_lauren982krupa1017ThatSlappinBasskadyzoo

Eorlas's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

See all of Eorlas's badges

Eorlas's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a few friends over. Wanting to seem cool, I yelled at my girlfriend to get me a beer. She chucked four bottles at my head. All my friends cheered her on. FML

#19957248
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4610) - you deserved it (52895)

On 07/19/2012 at 12:55am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my daughter's hamster pulled the water bottle off the glass, so I decided to super-glue the bottle back on. We came back an hour later to see if it had stuck, only to find both the bottle and rodent glued to the glass. FML

#19875784
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5578) - you deserved it (16070)

On 07/01/2012 at 11:59am - animals - by mommabuser -

Today, I was getting dirty with my boyfriend. It was the first time he had fingered anyone, and the only thing he said was, "It feels like the inside of my asshole." FML

#19810073
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40431) - you deserved it (3683)

On 06/18/2012 at 11:33pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I walked in on my mother stroking my cat and murmuring, "Don't worry, kitty. One day, you and I... we will rule." FML

#19734981
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24464) - you deserved it (2608)

On 06/04/2012 at 8:54pm - animals - by Scared (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had so much to do, I didn't know where to start. So I didn't. FML

#19714828
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10762) - you deserved it (39133)

On 06/01/2012 at 10:29am - misc - by Anonymous - Austria (Wien)

Today, in a rush to get my clothes back on at my girlfriend's house at the sound of her parents opening the front door, I forgot to take the condom off. Her dad watched it fall out of my pant leg and onto the kitchen floor. FML

#19710621
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17871) - you deserved it (37317)

On 05/31/2012 at 4:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went all the way for the first time with my girlfriend. After I had finished, she asked me, "What just happened? Was that sex?" I wasn't sure either. FML

#19660572
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22486) - you deserved it (4476)

On 05/22/2012 at 1:05am - intimacy - by chchboy (man) - United States

Today, I found a used condom in my trash can. I have been happily married to my wife for 7 years, and we use other forms of birth control. FML

#19380056
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32889) - you deserved it (2098)

On 03/31/2012 at 12:49am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my son asked me for advice over his girlfriend not "respecting" his pathetic need for near-constant sex. I got so bored listening to the misogynistic horse-shit spewing out of his mouth that I totally zoned out. I came to as he started hurling abuse at me for not siding with him. FML

#19222051
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21453) - you deserved it (7062)

On 03/05/2012 at 5:30pm - intimacy - by Alfie4 (man) - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I faced down the Godzilla of all spiders. I smashed the goddamned holy shit out of it. Trying to impress my cute new roommate, I scooped up the remains and showed him. It was his pet tarantula. FML

#19214836
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17090) - you deserved it (18483)

On 03/04/2012 at 3:46pm - misc - by Hannah (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I faced down the Godzilla of all spiders. I smashed the goddamned holy shit out of it. Trying to impress my cute new roommate, I scooped up the remains and showed him. It was his pet tarantula. FML

#19214836
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17090) - you deserved it (18483)

On 03/04/2012 at 3:46pm - misc - by Hannah (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I got pulled over. When the cop asked where I was coming from, reflexively I said, "Your mom's house." FML

Today, my boyfriend referred to his penis as 'The Eye of Sauron'. It didn't help when he pulled down his foreskin, pointed it in my direction and said 'I see you'. FML

#18844188
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27257) - you deserved it (4506)

On 01/18/2012 at 1:29pm - intimacy - by anon - United Kingdom

Today, it was our one year anniversary. After a surprise re-creation of our first date, we went home, in the mood for love. The food poisoning from the restaurant had a different idea. FML

#18694109
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25930) - you deserved it (1983)

On 01/03/2012 at 3:14am - love - by snarly1 - United States (California)

Today, my downstairs neighbor had a home birth. Not only did I hear eighteen hours of uninterrupted screaming, they called me afterwards, asking if I could come over to help them clean up. FML

#18520705
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32804) - you deserved it (2191)

On 12/15/2011 at 4:43pm - health - by Kara - United States (New York)



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