Enummoc

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Offline (the 01/16/2015 at 3:19pm)

Enummoc

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1803
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Enummoc's page activity

Visits<b>axeldudez</b> - the 02/25/2013 at 9:35pm<b>PHATERTL</b> - the 02/21/2013 at 11:51pm

Enummoc's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

42

You see, sonny boy, moderating FMLs is a bit like running a marathon.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of Enummoc's badges

Enummoc's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom tried to sell me a bag of rice, with "Cocaine" written on the side of it in sharpie pen. In exchange for my soul. FML

by Username / 07/05/2011 at 10:54pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I introduced my first serious boyfriend to my mother over dinner. He is Asian. My mom insisted on calling him "Ching Chong". His name is Kevin. FML

by asianlover / 06/30/2011 at 3:24am / Finland (Western Finland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I introduced my first serious boyfriend to my mother over dinner. He is Asian. My mom insisted on calling him "Ching Chong". His name is Kevin. FML

by asianlover / 06/30/2011 at 3:24am / Finland (Western Finland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my daughter told me that my head is shaped like a kidney bean and that I'm lucky she even talks to me in public. She's 6. FML

by MakeMyDay_27 / 06/27/2011 at 12:46pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids

Today, as I was smoking a cigarette I realized that it's time to quit. This realization came to me after a particularly violent coughing bout forced not tar out of my lungs, but rather poo out of my bum. FML

by Hopslammer / 06/16/2011 at 9:39pm / United States (Indiana) / Health

Today, at 5:30 in the morning while I was fast asleep, my cat decided the most threatening thing in my apartment that absolutely needed to be attacked was my left nipple. FML

by cdn_steed / 04/23/2011 at 9:11am / United States (New York) / Animals

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm / United Kingdom (Wiltshire) / Geek

Today, I cut my finger deep on an envelope at work and started bleeding profusely. When I asked my co-worker for a band-aid, she told me to get back to work and stop making up excuses to try and hit on her. FML

by alliwantisabandaid / 02/11/2011 at 3:27am / Work

Today, I learned that standing next to a hobo doesn't make me look better in comparison, but instead just makes me seem like a hobo as well. FML

by 7rafe7 / 02/06/2011 at 2:37am / United States / Money

Today, I was startled awake at 4am by a loud and awful sound. Completely serious, I asked my fiancé if he had just shit his pants. His response: giggles followed by a softly whispered "maybe". FML

by Anonymous / 02/01/2011 at 8:43am / United States / Love

Today, as the clock struck twelve for the new year, I was in the bathroom having a nosebleed. FML

by cauteriseme / 01/01/2011 at 10:37am / United Kingdom (Warwickshire) / Health

Today, without even trying, I convinced my 17-year-old daughter that blueberries are just peas holding their breath. I have raised a complete airhead. FML

by parentfail / 12/11/2010 at 9:44am / United Kingdom / Kids

Today, I was texting my trainer to rearrange our training session. My girlfriend texted me during the exchange, asking what I wanted for Christmas. I accidentally texted my trainer, "All I want are your sweet titties in my face". I'm awaiting a response. FML

by Anonymous / 11/27/2010 at 3:36pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I was talking to my manager about a movie. She asked what main actors were in it, but the only one I could remember was Forest Whitaker. I told her then immediately blurted out "You know, the one with the freaky lazy eye." My manager has a lazy eye. FML

by workaholic / 11/17/2010 at 2:34am / Work

Today, I realized the nicest thing my fiancé has said to me all month was that I have "very suckable titties." FML

by Anonymous / 11/11/2010 at 8:48pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy