Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

EmmyBabe

Search for a member

EmmyBabe

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 31 December 1994 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 754
  • Number of comments : 63
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About EmmyBabe : -

EmmyBabe's page activity

Visits<b>brittanyx00</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 8:33am<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 1:31am<b>ThatsStoryOfLife</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 12:09am<b>meegs0425</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 2:34pm<b>drdeathnacho</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 9:24pm<b>Caity1243</b> - the 05/24/2014 at 5:06am<b>neonvortex</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 11:27pm<b>simoneledet</b> - the 04/10/2014 at 10:57am<b>forsaken74</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 1:57pm<b>Jellybellybeanz</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 4:21am<b>shaunr40k</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 12:36pm<b>PAsurvivor</b> - the 03/31/2014 at 2:22am<b>Yorih17</b> - the 03/29/2014 at 7:11pm<b>Redde</b> - the 03/28/2014 at 1:25pm<b>Kyrain</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 2:30pm<b>inner_peace</b> - the 03/10/2014 at 12:47am<b>LissaMccracken</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 5:24pm<b>jarobjent</b> - the 02/08/2014 at 5:20pm

EmmyBabe's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

EmmyBabe's favorite FMLs

Today, I had an admissions interview at my dream college. I spent hours practicing questions and picking the perfect outfit. It was not until after the interview that I realized I'd scratched a pimple while waiting, and my forehead had been smeared with blood the entire time. FML

#19750002
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27202) - you deserved it (3692)

On 06/07/2012 at 2:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, on Facebook, my sister posted a ton of photos of herself wearing a skimpy bikini, commenting that she looked hideous and fat. I can't stand attention-seeking fuckballs, so I called her on it. My mother then condemned me for "mocking" my sister, and grounded me for an entire month. FML

#19689652
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31303) - you deserved it (5321)

On 05/27/2012 at 5:53pm - misc - by namenlos (man) - Australia

Today, my mother thought it would be a good idea to tell me that I was conceived on an airplane toilet. FML

#18728247
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30127) - you deserved it (2631)

On 01/06/2012 at 6:16pm - intimacy - by Gemma - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, I found that when a hot girl asks you whether you have a girlfriend, saying, "I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one" is not the best way to proceed. FML

#18442495
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9872) - you deserved it (67038)

On 12/06/2011 at 1:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I found a condom on my bed with a note written by my girlfriend that said, "Since you started acting like a dick, you might as well dress like one." FML

#18345679
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11869) - you deserved it (56181)

On 11/25/2011 at 10:02am - intimacy - by Dickhead - Lebanon

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

#17981940
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44796) - you deserved it (5027)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by MLGreco - United States

Today, my father started drinking a little early. At some point, he got hungry and decided to boil eggs. He started a dozen, drank some more, and passed out on the couch. When I came home, all the water had boiled off and the eggs had exploded all over the kitchen. I'm still cleaning up the mess. FML

#17981925
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27529) - you deserved it (2125)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:09pm - misc - by francesa_loca - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, a highly intoxicated man came into my workplace and complained that the medicine that I'd prescribed for his dog almost choked him. I work at Blockbuster. FML

#17948173
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27039) - you deserved it (2176)

On 10/09/2011 at 11:30pm - work - by Username - United States (Texas)

Today, at work I got an urgent message from my boyfriend that there was an emergency and I should come home immediately. I took my last personal day of the month and drove the half-hour home. The emergency? The cat had vomited on the comforter. FML

#17901158
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26015) - you deserved it (3105)

On 10/04/2011 at 12:48am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, my grandpa told me what he'd do if he was president. I sat there for 30 minutes listening to how he'd get rid of prisons, send all the prisoners to a desert for 5 years and give them a gun to fight over. And then he'd surgically attach child molesters' penises to their foreheads. FML

#17556947
401 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30081) - you deserved it (5645)

On 08/23/2011 at 10:46am - intimacy - by Andrew (man) - United States

Today, I applied to live in a barn. FML

#17554659
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22281) - you deserved it (7689)

On 08/23/2011 at 1:39am - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, a hooker refused my custom. According to her, "Even whores have standards." FML

#17548776
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19936) - you deserved it (41575)

On 08/22/2011 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I was diagnosed with crabs. I lost my virginity to my wife, and have never had sex or any sexual contact with anyone but her in my life. FML

#17521607
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46382) - you deserved it (3981)

On 08/19/2011 at 5:57pm - intimacy - by jimmy - United Kingdom (London)

Today, a cute guy in a bar came up to me, and we started chatting. I'm a natural blonde, and he commented on how nice my hair was. He then followed this up with, "Does the carpet match the curtains?" FML

#17485415
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31901) - you deserved it (4617)

On 08/15/2011 at 11:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I met my new neighbor. His wi-fi access point is named "TheRapistDownstairs." FML

#17483730
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36761) - you deserved it (3456)

On 08/15/2011 at 8:30pm - misc - by creepedoutlady - United States



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: