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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1431
  • Number of comments : 43
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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Emmiii's page activity

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Emmiii's FML badges

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

See all of Emmiii's badges

Emmiii's favorite FMLs

Today, an attractive man hit on me for the first time since I ended my 3-year relationship with my cheating ex. Then the man told me he'd just gotten out of prison last week. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24391) - you deserved it (2342)

On 07/23/2015 at 1:29pm - love - by monogamyisalie - United States

Today, I was working at the local grocery store and a customer of mine, who had only bought two granola bars and was holding up my line, tried to convert me to Christianity. Out of all the people to target, she chose the shy atheist who just wanted to do her minimum wage job in peace. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24212) - you deserved it (2608)

On 07/22/2015 at 12:20am - work - by Quortney - United States

Today, my mother talked shit about me to the cat while I was in the room. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24603) - you deserved it (2484)

On 07/11/2015 at 1:20pm - misc - by whymomwhy (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, a guy asked me for my number. Now I deeply regret giving it to him, because he won't stop sending me Bible quotes and pictures of Jesus. FML

Today, I was playing Monopoly with my extended family. When my wife came home, she kicked me out of the game and took all my money and property. When I said she couldn't do that, she said "Sure I can. It's called divorce." Everyone laughed. Now I'm bored as hell, watching everyone else play. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28758) - you deserved it (3419)

On 04/17/2015 at 4:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my mother admitted to me that she sends me up and down the stairs to get things for her because she thinks I could use the exercise. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25222) - you deserved it (4670)

On 04/06/2015 at 4:49pm - health - by TheRunaway21 (woman) - United States

Today, I accidentally ate a cat treat instead of a cinnamon glazed pecan. I thought it must have been burnt by the way it tasted, so ate a few more before I figured out my mistake and spat them out. FML


I agree, your life sucks (22648) - you deserved it (12337)

On 03/17/2015 at 3:14am - animals - by ilovecharliesheen (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my new boyfriend and I really wanted to have sex, but he went soft as soon as he entered me. This happens every time we try. I feel cursed by my year-long dry spell. FML


I agree, your life sucks (31055) - you deserved it (3442)

On 02/06/2015 at 9:32pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, my young daughter came up to me, grabbed my face and said, "I'm putting you in the garbage." When I laughed and asked why, she looked me dead in the eye and said, "You are trash." FML


I agree, your life sucks (29461) - you deserved it (3342)

On 01/30/2015 at 12:41pm - kids - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I found my intoxicated step-father in our back yard trying to domesticate a stray opossum, attempting to give it steak and malt liquor. FML


I agree, your life sucks (26391) - you deserved it (1926)

On 01/09/2015 at 10:41pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of six years. She got mad at me, saying she is too young to get married and that I was trying to ruin her career. She is 32 and works part-time at a grocery store. FML


I agree, your life sucks (35854) - you deserved it (3139)

On 12/23/2014 at 10:24am - love - by got any coupons? - United States

Today, I was t-boned and my truck was rendered useless. I was given a ticket even though the man who hit me ran a red light. Why? Because there was dirt on my license plate. FML


I agree, your life sucks (32757) - you deserved it (2844)

On 12/22/2014 at 9:22pm - misc - by killerxdeagles - United States (Kansas)

Today, my date mugged me, just minutes after I paid our bill at the restaurant. FML


I agree, your life sucks (32924) - you deserved it (2473)

On 12/19/2014 at 6:27pm - money - by j4 - United Kingdom

Today, I sat down for a poop. The toilet seat slid off immediately, taking me with it. I lay on the bathroom floor for several moments stunned, still pooping. FML


I agree, your life sucks (33027) - you deserved it (4245)

On 11/30/2014 at 2:32pm - misc - by pooplife - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

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