Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

EmmMann94

Search for a member

EmmMann94

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 31 August 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3161
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

EmmMann94's page activity

Visits<b>Sprezlaus</b> - the 11/02/2012 at 10:24am<b>bryan788</b> - the 09/18/2012 at 2:51am<b>Rooks</b> - the 08/31/2012 at 1:39pm<b>specialPrankster</b> - the 08/26/2012 at 6:33pm<b>Tiwuz</b> - the 08/26/2012 at 4:47pm<b>trqskq</b> - the 08/24/2012 at 7:52am<b>FMyLifeGod040</b> - the 08/21/2012 at 3:22pm<b>aqua8992</b> - the 08/19/2012 at 4:40pm<b>n1a1t1h1a1n1</b> - the 08/14/2012 at 1:52am<b>wachunga</b> - the 08/13/2012 at 10:10am<b>Claire83</b> - the 08/12/2012 at 9:30am<b>srichandra10</b> - the 08/12/2012 at 6:30am<b>leeb26</b> - the 08/11/2012 at 8:33pm<b>fortunelady</b> - the 08/11/2012 at 5:36pm<b>nadiamarie1990</b> - the 08/11/2012 at 2:02pm<b>Piet1991</b> - the 08/09/2012 at 2:23pm<b>w4rri0r</b> - the 08/09/2012 at 10:25am<b>vernk</b> - the 08/09/2012 at 3:11am

EmmMann94's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of EmmMann94's badges

EmmMann94's favorite FMLs

Today, I caught my pregnant wife trying to suck milk from her breasts. FML

#17749622
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31567) - you deserved it (5687)

On 09/15/2011 at 3:34am - health - by Scott - United States (California)

Today, I apologized to the cat for walking into the laundry room while he was using the litter box. FML

#17734128
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23531) - you deserved it (9426)

On 09/13/2011 at 2:05am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

#17727595
393 comments

I agree, your life sucks (85308) - you deserved it (13083)

On 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by IbetIgotAIDS (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I decided to formally introduce my girlfriend to my parents. My dad took the opportunity to apologize for walking in on us a few days ago while we were having sex. It wasn't her. Thanks dad. FML

#17709124
583 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20885) - you deserved it (236231)

On 09/10/2011 at 2:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I'm getting kicked out of my flat because my drunk friends stole a pony and left it tied outside. FML

#17669700
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25910) - you deserved it (2992)

On 09/05/2011 at 11:03am - misc - by thefrightening1 (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I was digging in the backyard when my mom came out, nodded her head approvingly, and with a straight face told me it was good practice for when I inevitably go to prison. FML

#17661363
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24087) - you deserved it (3998)

On 09/04/2011 at 1:05pm - work - by mike - United States

Today, my best friend and I were playing Call of Duty, when he said he had to go to the bathroom. Curious, I checked his phone. A text message read, "Tell your friend you're going to the bathroom and come eat. Pizza is here." from his dad. Apparently, I'm not good enough to feed. FML

#17657818
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34953) - you deserved it (7156)

On 09/04/2011 at 12:16am - misc - by Pizza-less - United States (Washington)

Today, I asked my Dad if it was true that my mother had a C-section at my birth. He replied "Yeah, so technically you weren't even born, you were surgically removed, like a tumor." FML

#17638273
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34894) - you deserved it (4403)

On 09/01/2011 at 7:40pm - misc - by mannydanny (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, while paying for groceries, I opened my wallet to find that all my cash had been exchanged for Monopoly money. FML

#17598415
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32706) - you deserved it (2739)

On 08/27/2011 at 8:38pm - money - by KayDayParade - United States

Today, I was installing updates on my 16 year old daughter's laptop, when I got the urge to snoop around. I found a 5,000 word sex story involving her and the Edward and Jacob weirdos from the Twilight movies. I can't even look her in the eyes. I can't believe I raised this freak. FML

#17589386
678 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30184) - you deserved it (49178)

On 08/26/2011 at 9:13pm - kids - by f*ckingdisgusted - United States

Today, I asked my two children why they smelled like pee after we had gotten lunch at McDonald's. They told me that they were playing in the puddles in the play-place. FML

#17557352
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34786) - you deserved it (4413)

On 08/23/2011 at 11:55am - kids - by Username - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, it was my birthday, and my kids gave me my car keys I had "lost" a week ago. FML

#17547713
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28414) - you deserved it (2884)

On 08/22/2011 at 12:46pm - kids - by rene - United States (Texas)

Today, my brother told the family that if you pull on the dog's back foot then she always obeys. I later found my mom tugging on the dog's foot whispering "jump off a cliff" repeatedly. FML

#17531478
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26524) - you deserved it (2148)

On 08/20/2011 at 7:02pm - misc - by lala7 - United States

Today, while riding in the car with my mother, we got into an argument, at which point she pulled the vehicle over, took the key out of the ignition and used it to turn off the passenger airbag. She then continued driving in silence. FML

#17526290
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33286) - you deserved it (4474)

On 08/20/2011 at 2:23am - misc - by W1D0 - United States (Illinois)

Today, I walked in on my parents discussing how to kill our cat, and how to make it look like an accident. FML

#17508595
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37761) - you deserved it (3006)

On 08/18/2011 at 9:38am - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Bexley)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: