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EmmMann94

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EmmMann94
  • Town/Country : Farmington, Us
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 31 August 1994 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 2177
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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EmmMann94's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my dad why there were no photos of me on the wall. He replied, "Every time you disappoint us we burn one." FML

#19586113
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27520) - you deserved it (4462)

On 05/07/2012 at 5:51am - misc - by N (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, while showering with my boyfriend, he asked if something was weird about his penis. Naturally, I looked closer. As soon as I did, he sprayed my face with urine. This is only the beginning; we just moved in. FML

#19586096
359 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43840) - you deserved it (8536)

On 05/07/2012 at 5:42am - intimacy - by quirrus (woman) - United States

Today, I was working at the local liquor store. An obviously drunk girl stumbles in, grabs two cases of beer and puts them on the counter. Then she grabs a pregnancy test, pees on it right there, shows me, and says, "I'm not pregnant, I want beer." FML

#19572319
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28866) - you deserved it (1795)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:08am - work - by viviham - United States (Texas)

Today, while I was sneaking a boy out of my room at 2am, I ran into my mom sneaking a man into her room. FML

#19568801
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33306) - you deserved it (9693)

On 05/03/2012 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by dentistrygirl - United States

Today, I saw my boyfriend spitting the mouthwash back into the bottle, because, "this stuff is really expensive." FML

#19567272
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25239) - you deserved it (2050) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/03/2012 at 3:55am - misc - by Laura (woman) - France

Today, I had a chest x-ray. I thought everything was okay, that is until the tech gasped slightly and muttered, "Mother of God." I asked him what was wrong, and he kept insisting he had no idea what I was talking about. Now I'm so upset I can't even sleep. FML

#19564735
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27792) - you deserved it (1934)

On 05/02/2012 at 6:41pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, to avoid looking like a loser in front of his friends who all have girlfriends, my brother made up a perfect relationship. He asked me to give him a hickey in exchange for 50 euros. Our parents walked in on us. FML

#19561833
328 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11260) - you deserved it (38060) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/02/2012 at 1:06am - love - by Flip (woman) - France (Rhone-Alpes)

Today, my parents decided on my punishment for failing an English test. No deodorant for a week. They think they're so hilarious, they told all their friends and now it's all over Facebook. FML

#19555770
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22091) - you deserved it (3343)

On 04/30/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by sockmonkey (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was visiting my 8-year-old nephew. He told me he learned about fire safety, so I asked him what he'd do if there were a fire right now. He pushed me out of the way and I fell, then he ran over me and out the front door, leaving me on the floor in pain. FML

#19555079
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14191) - you deserved it (2680)

On 04/30/2012 at 8:22pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I rear ended a cop while talking on my cell phone. FML

#19541631
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6153) - you deserved it (75374)

On 04/28/2012 at 10:31am - misc - by anon - United States (Washington)

Today, I had to explain to a customer how our hotel charged his card even though he has never stayed with us. Apparently his wife is a regular customer. I can't help but feel like a home-wrecker. FML

#19541511
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28751) - you deserved it (1752)

On 04/28/2012 at 9:57am - misc - by Steve - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my wife woke me up by giving my erect penis a Chinese burn. FML

#19540366
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20801) - you deserved it (2161)

On 04/28/2012 at 12:42am - intimacy - by poo4brains - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, as I was crossing an intersection, a car ran a red light and almost hit me. This kind of thing happens a lot in my town so I'm used to almost being run-down, except this time it was a small boy on his father's lap steering. The dad was laughing. FML

#19531313
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21931) - you deserved it (1489)

On 04/26/2012 at 7:49am - misc - by Diffy - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my new dog unburied my old dog and chewed on his bones. FML

#19520416
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41898) - you deserved it (3001)

On 04/24/2012 at 1:42am - animals - by jessica071509 - United States (Arizona)

Today, I discovered that last night, my son snuck downstairs at 3am, drank two glasses of my very expensive wine, threw up on his bed, and then slept in his own vomit. My son is 14. FML

#19517989
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23850) - you deserved it (3957)

On 04/23/2012 at 6:51pm - kids - by sadmommy - United States (Texas)



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