EmmMann94

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EmmMann94

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 31 August 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6461
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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EmmMann94's page activity

Visits<b>Sprezlaus</b> - the 11/02/2012 at 10:24am<b>bryan788</b> - the 09/18/2012 at 2:51am<b>Rooks</b> - the 08/31/2012 at 1:39pm<b>specialPrankster</b> - the 08/26/2012 at 6:33pm<b>Tiwuz</b> - the 08/26/2012 at 4:47pm<b>trqskq</b> - the 08/24/2012 at 7:52am<b>FMyLifeGod040</b> - the 08/21/2012 at 3:22pm<b>aqua8992</b> - the 08/19/2012 at 4:40pm<b>n1a1t1h1a1n1</b> - the 08/14/2012 at 1:52am<b>wachunga</b> - the 08/13/2012 at 10:10am<b>Claire83</b> - the 08/12/2012 at 9:30am<b>srichandra10</b> - the 08/12/2012 at 6:30am<b>leeb26</b> - the 08/11/2012 at 8:33pm<b>fortunelady</b> - the 08/11/2012 at 5:36pm<b>nadiamarie1990</b> - the 08/11/2012 at 2:02pm<b>Piet1991</b> - the 08/09/2012 at 2:23pm<b>w4rri0r</b> - the 08/09/2012 at 10:25am<b>amatoy</b> - the 08/09/2012 at 1:01am

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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EmmMann94's favorite FMLs

Today, I am on vacation in the Smoky Mountains with my parents. They just decided to take me to the place I was conceived seventeen years ago: a bench at a public park. FML

by anon / 05/24/2012 at 2:59pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I was shopping with a friend. We snuck into the same fitting room so we could give our opinions on each other's clothes. The suspicious saleswoman knocked on the door and asked how many people were in our room. I quickly answered, "It's OK. She's just watching." FML

by Shopper / 05/23/2012 at 6:50pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was browsing the web on my boyfriend's laptop, when I idly clicked a bookmark. It turned out to be his private blog, where he most recently spoke in very creepy detail about his efforts to make me love him, remarking that, "Soon, I'll plant my seed in her breeding hips." FML

by Anonymous / 05/22/2012 at 4:49pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, I read an article on babies dying after being accidentally left in cars in the sun. On my lunch break, I decided to walk around the parking lot, checking to see that no kids were abandoned in cars. A guy gave me a smack for looking through his car window. FML

by whytoday / 05/21/2012 at 10:59am / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I went mini golfing with his family. We had a competition going on, and when I managed to get two consecutive holes in one, he started seething and muttered that I'm dangerously close to becoming single. FML

by Jacquelinez / 05/20/2012 at 2:20pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was really sick. I had been sneezing all day and my skin had started to dry out. When my mom asked me if I needed anything, I immediately responded with "lotion and tissues," not realizing what I was suggesting. She then talked to me for 20 minutes about how "masturbation is okay." FML

by sick and awkward / 05/20/2012 at 2:11am / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up after a long night of drinking with my friends. I vaguely remembered visiting a tattoo parlour, but nothing prepared me for the sight of the words "YOLO" and "MOFO" tattooed across the fingers of my left and right hands. Now I'm officially a bandwagoning douchebag. FML

by Anonymous / 05/16/2012 at 5:56pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was told the Mandarin greeting that my new Chinese friends at school taught me was not really a greeting at all. I've been proclaiming "I'm a dumb bitch" every time I've greeted them, almost every day for the past month. FML

by FML / 05/15/2012 at 3:02pm / Finland / Miscellaneous

Today, whilst working in a pharmacy, I was given the pleasure of listening to an old lady share the details of what she sticks up her vagina. FML

by uni life / 05/15/2012 at 4:08am / Australia (Western Australia) / Intimacy

Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML

by lafinesse / 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to a club with some friends. I ordered two drinks from the waitress and gave her a fifty. She never returned with the change, and the rest of the staff claimed they didn't know who I was talking about. FML

by Jon / 05/14/2012 at 5:46pm / New Zealand (Canterbury) / Money

Today, I really had to pee while babysitting. Normally this isn't a problem, except the kids were sleeping and going potty would wake them up right before their parents were due home. Desperate, I decided to pee in a cup in the kitchen and wash it down the sink. Their parents came home mid-stream. FML

by fired / 05/13/2012 at 2:26am / United States (Oregon) / Work

Today, I brought my 90-year-old grandfather into school for a project that required to bring in "a first-hand account" of the Great Depression. He started off by telling the class how in his day, they "threw rocks at black people." FML

by Class / 05/11/2012 at 7:52pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out who my randomly assigned roommate was. Out of 10,000+ people, I just happen to get assigned a girl who threatened to kill me. FML

by roomingwithevil / 05/09/2012 at 7:26pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked my dad why there were no photos of me on the wall. He replied, "Every time you disappoint us we burn one." FML

by N / 05/07/2012 at 5:51am / United Kingdom (Glasgow City) / Miscellaneous