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EmmMann94

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EmmMann94
  • Town/Country : Farmington, Us
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 31 August 1994 (19 years)
  • Number of visits : 2192
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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EmmMann94's favorite FMLs

Today, my neighborhood had its annual summer barbecue, and I ended up showing a little boy who lives down the street how to hit a baseball. When I gave him back his bat so he could try for himself, he swung it into my shin and yelled, "Tag! You're it!" FML

#19844556
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17041) - you deserved it (1933)

On 06/25/2012 at 12:09pm - kids - by bcoper (man) - Switzerland (Luzern)

Today, a homeless man tried to sell me a "magic, one-finger glove". It was a used condom. FML

#19838531
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24205) - you deserved it (2047)

On 06/24/2012 at 10:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found an empty parking space in a crowded parking lot. When I came back later, a lady and a cop were standing by my car. Her car used to be parked there and got stolen. They think I'm involved. FML

#19836485
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21726) - you deserved it (1327)

On 06/23/2012 at 11:23pm - misc - by Melinie - United States

Today, I had a wet dream in the middle of an 8-hour-long airplane flight. FML

#19830472
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28923) - you deserved it (3646)

On 06/22/2012 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by Uncomfy (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was lecturing my high school students on the importance of a good education. I pointed out the janitor in the hall and told them if they didn't stay in school, they'd end up like him. Then one of my students raised her hand and reminded me that the janitor I pointed to was her dad. FML

#19821696
393 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5758) - you deserved it (62925)

On 06/21/2012 at 12:11am - work - by daddy'sgirl - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I went to the gynecologist. As she was checking me out, she said, "Wow. So you must get wet a lot." It took me several minutes to realize she was talking about my job bathing dogs. FML

#19820234
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20295) - you deserved it (2694)

On 06/20/2012 at 7:08pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got into a huge fight with a girl at school. My mom and dad decided to punish me by letting my three older brothers pick out my wardrobe for the next week. FML

#19812569
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20489) - you deserved it (14151)

On 06/19/2012 at 12:38pm - misc - by Shelby - United States (Illinois)

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

#19793582
398 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35084) - you deserved it (3816)

On 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by 16590 (man) - Sweden

Today, I found out how my parents met. They met at a mental hospital, where they were both being hospitalized. FML

#19791945
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26577) - you deserved it (2183)

On 06/15/2012 at 11:36am - love - by fail (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was at a big family reunion at my aunt's place. Before dinner, I went outside in the garden for a smoke. Through the kitchen window, I saw my cousin spit in the soup. Twice. My aunt patted his back and continued stirring. FML

#19780392
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23754) - you deserved it (1954)

On 06/13/2012 at 2:13am - misc - by eww - Austria (Wien)

Today, my date made me pay him for picking me up, and taking me back home. FML

#19779965
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23034) - you deserved it (2975)

On 06/13/2012 at 12:42am - money - by bad date - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I volunteered at a soup kitchen. During the rounds, a grisly but nice young fellow told me that I had beautiful eyes. I was quite touched; that is until he leaned in and added, "Can I have them for my collection?" FML

#19777133
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23167) - you deserved it (1608)

On 06/12/2012 at 3:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my identical twin sister's boyfriend walked over to me, and whispered in my ear, "I know what you look like naked." FML

#19776975
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38458) - you deserved it (3667)

On 06/12/2012 at 2:28pm - misc - by creeped out - United States (New York)

Today, I was using a public toilet when someone entered the stall next to mine. Instead of using the facilities, the person in there reached under the stall to steal my bag. Fortunately, I was holding the strap so they couldn't take it. Unfortunately, they decided to take my right shoe instead. FML

Today, I was texting my girlfriend and asked her for a picture, expecting something provocative. She sent me a picture of her holding a positive pregnancy test. We had sex once. FML

#19758301
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14286) - you deserved it (39142)

On 06/09/2012 at 12:51am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Mississippi)



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