About EmilyShmemily496 : Hey. I'm Emily. I'm really boring.
But since you took all of the effort to creep, I guess I'll tell you about myself.
I really like Blink-182, The Killers, and Rush
You're a creep
Art and band is my life
I play tennis and badminton
Blah blah blah
I love Jenna Marbles
I am single
And I rarely comment, so of you're reading this, feel special. Most people will never see this.
Oh and I change my bio often. If you're lucky enough to see it twice, you get a freakin cookie.
Email me!
emury496@yahoo.com
Then go to sirinz.org
Alright BYEE :)
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I approached my daughter and told her she needs to clean her room. Her response was, "Thank you Captain Obvious." She's 4. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21453) - you deserved it (7074)
On 09/05/2011 at 1:04pm - kids - by kidswithnomanners (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my six year old nephew told me to peel off my skin because, "They say you look prettier on the inside." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22930) - you deserved it (2209)
On 09/03/2011 at 10:36am - kids - by abby181 - United States (Colorado)
Today, I went to a baseball game. On the way in, I managed to trip and get stuck in the turnstile. It took five minutes of flailing and twisting around in front of hundreds of people before I managed to pull myself out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14289) - you deserved it (2863)
On 09/02/2011 at 6:20pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, I went to a baseball game. On the way in, I managed to trip and get stuck in the turnstile. It took five minutes of flailing and twisting around in front of hundreds of people before I managed to pull myself out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14289) - you deserved it (2863)
On 09/02/2011 at 6:20pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, I was the designated driver. On the way home with my drunk friends, they decide to give me a beer shower. I swerved, and was pulled over by a cop moments after. I was the only one arrested. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25628) - you deserved it (2645)
On 08/25/2011 at 2:49am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I started my new job as a teacher. Worried about how I looked, I asked a coworker if I looked okay. She said, "You look fine. Just like a normal high school kid." I spent the next half hour convincing her that I was not a student, but a teacher. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19557) - you deserved it (2261)
On 08/24/2011 at 4:33pm - work - by Meagan smith - United States (Colorado)
Today, I started my new job as a teacher. Worried about how I looked, I asked a coworker if I looked okay. She said, "You look fine. Just like a normal high school kid." I spent the next half hour convincing her that I was not a student, but a teacher. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19557) - you deserved it (2261)
On 08/24/2011 at 4:33pm - work - by Meagan smith - United States (Colorado)
Today, after 18 years of struggling to provide my daughter with the finest educational opportunities I could afford, I dropped her off to start school at the best public university in the U.S. So far the only thing she's learned is what weed smells like. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22077) - you deserved it (4299)
On 08/23/2011 at 5:55pm - kids - by BerzerkelyBongBabe (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was baking cookies. I stared at them for 15 minutes and finally asked my dad, "Why are these taking so long?" He looked up at the oven and replied, "It might help if you turn the oven on." FML
I agree, your life sucks (7059) - you deserved it (31864)
On 08/23/2011 at 2:18pm - misc - by Kendal - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I got a flat tire in the middle of nowhere. I called AAA, and they said it would take 2 hours to get there. They called 2 hours later saying they got a flat tire and would be there in another 2 hours. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31944) - you deserved it (2489)
On 08/17/2011 at 12:45pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)
Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28324) - you deserved it (5111)
On 08/17/2011 at 12:40pm - misc - by EmbarrassedGirlfriend101 - United States
Today, I thought it'd be funny to knee my sister's ass as she was bending over. What I didn't realise was that she was trying to pick up a spider. In shock, she threw it in the air and it landed on my chest. I ran into a wall trying to get it off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5435) - you deserved it (48243)
On 08/16/2011 at 6:17am - animals - by NaniNarcotic - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my mom was convinced that the lawn gnomes we bought from Wal-Mart were secretly conspiring to kill us. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23588) - you deserved it (2473)
On 08/16/2011 at 2:52am - misc - by Stevie - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my little brother proudly informed me that he found a way to suck pool water up his asshole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27207) - you deserved it (2045)
On 08/16/2011 at 2:22am - kids - by Gross... (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I met my new neighbor. His wi-fi access point is named "TheRapistDownstairs." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31175) - you deserved it (2512)
On 08/15/2011 at 8:30pm - misc - by creepedoutlady - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
