EmilyJane718

Search for a member

EmilyJane718

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 18 July 1995 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 709
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About EmilyJane718 : Country girl. Taken since 12-14-11 and expecting in November. Favorites- Cookie Monster, penguins, racing, hunting, fishing, four wheeling, mc.donalds, Bahamas, family, and God. No Facebook, Instagram, or snapchat. Have a great day!(:

EmilyJane718's page activity

Visits<b>holymacabre</b> - the 07/19/2016 at 7:08pm<b>Blesst</b> - the 04/03/2016 at 11:44am<b>evanvoss</b> - the 03/27/2016 at 6:49pm<b>Crazion</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 3:30pm<b>JDSini</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 4:54pm<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 9:07pm<b>paigexox0</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 3:26am<b>Novadi</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 12:43pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 2:56pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 2:27pm<b>deemahazem</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 10:20am<b>Silentshdw13</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 1:13am<b>_Rachel_2008</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 10:41am<b>random_dude42</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 11:13pm<b>REALAfroninga</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 1:20pm<b>kingtice</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 10:07am<b>aa1717</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 1:54am<b>ryanpmcg</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 9:00pm

EmilyJane718's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

See all of EmilyJane718's badges

EmilyJane718's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized the person I had been habitually stealing bag lunches from at work made me a canned dog food sandwich. FML

by Hairball / 09/01/2009 at 2:05pm / United States (South Carolina) / Work

Today, while I was walking downtown a homeless person asked me for a dollar. I thought it would be funny to wave the dollar in his face and taunt him. I guess he thought it would be funny to stab me in the leg with a pencil. FML

by who_could_it_be / 08/06/2009 at 9:35am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the mall with my mom. She was pissing me off, so I started screaming at her and causing a scene. I ended up falling all the way down the up escalator. Everyone saw and people clapped. FML

by ouchers / 06/11/2009 at 3:49pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML

by I_Am_The_Edge / 06/11/2009 at 12:06pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was playing around with my sister's kitten. As a joke, I put him underneath the sheets and farted. He attacked my nuts. FML

by Anonymous / 06/07/2009 at 11:53am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was bored and decided it would be fun to pretend to be an undercover cop and pull over other cars. The first car I pulled over was a real undercover cop. FML

by tvaladie / 04/16/2009 at 8:19pm / United States (Tennessee) / Transportation

Today, I was at the mall shoplifting when a girl who looked my age pointed to a shirt I had in my bag. "Stole that, huh?" she asked smiling. She looked pretty cool, so I nodded and asked if she stole the jeans she was wearing, which were from the store. Turns out she didn't, she's the manager. FML

by blovesg / 04/06/2009 at 8:41pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2009 at 12:46am / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped a pimple on his neck. Into my mouth. FML

by KAAALIS / 03/15/2009 at 10:20pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I was walking when a man pointed a camera at me. I got bitchy about it, and said "Did I say you could take a picture?" He replied with, "No, but can you get the fuck out of the way so I can take one of my wife and kids?" I turned around, and they were right behind me. FML

by PicturePerfect / 03/02/2009 at 4:33pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was typing up a love letter on my computer. A sexual love letter. I was in a classroom, I'm the teacher, I'm gay, and my love letter showed up on the tv screen while my 7th grade students were taking a test. It was up on the screen for 15 minutes. FML

by Sad / 03/01/2009 at 4:08am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I forgot to do my French homework, but since it was an online worksheet, I told my teacher my internet wasn't working. I told her with an e-mail. FML

by ihavepinkbackpac / 02/28/2009 at 2:07pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was a TA for a history class and the class was taking a test. About halfway through, I noticed one kid had a small piece of paper in his hand. I ran up the row, grabbed his test, and ripped it into four pieces. Then I took the note from him. It said "I believe in you, -Mom." FML

by Noname / 02/26/2009 at 10:30am / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, I got stuck in an elevator for 2 hours with my boyfriend and the guy that I have been secretly having an affair with for 6 months. FML

by Noname / 02/02/2009 at 2:23pm / United States (Maryland) / Love