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Offline (the 11/11/2016 at 5:00am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5114
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About EmeraldMoonshine : I'm 19. I'm a dancer.

Life sucks for most of us, so let's make ourselves feel better by reading other people's sucky lives.

EmeraldMoonshine's page activity

Visits<b>Mons</b> - the 09/27/2016 at 3:24pm<b>chewsef</b> - the 09/27/2016 at 12:24am<b>doubledutchy</b> - the 09/26/2016 at 11:48pm<b>Contiinuous</b> - the 09/26/2016 at 11:22pm<b>SpartyOnWayne</b> - the 09/26/2016 at 7:09pm<b>mbdresnick</b> - the 09/26/2016 at 4:07pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 09/26/2016 at 3:48pm<b>Captobvious19</b> - the 09/26/2016 at 2:14pm<b>Rintarok5</b> - the 09/26/2016 at 2:05pm<b>bigwell</b> - the 09/26/2016 at 1:46pm<b>maxwilliamc</b> - the 09/18/2016 at 11:54pm<b>Skycop_S</b> - the 03/19/2016 at 7:29pm<b>nodeathtoall</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 4:09pm<b>Hop6e</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 2:29pm<b>hotmessguy</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 4:22am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 1:19pm<b>Fetuskicker666</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 6:26pm<b>Beedrus</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 8:21am

Fucked!<b>chewsef</b> - the 09/27/2016 at 6:25am<b>SpartyOnWayne</b> - the 09/27/2016 at 1:10am<b>Rintarok5</b> - the 09/26/2016 at 8:06pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 10:59pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 12:52pm<b>tranced_</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 9:54pm<b>orios105</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 10:12pm<b>Chinhull</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 2:59pm<b>bradoiler</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 5:50am<b>Fetuskicker666</b> - the 09/08/2015 at 9:12pm<b>juice_33</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 4:48am<b>Hildy93</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 8:31am<b>Stephc3213</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 1:30am<b>maxwilliamc</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 11:52pm<b>tiger820</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 7:06pm<b>Logicscmogic</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 8:18am<b>wickedhyype</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 11:42pm<b>Coachjoost79</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 5:25am

EmeraldMoonshine's FML badges

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.


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I like your style

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EmeraldMoonshine's favorite FMLs

Today, I donated a dollar to a kids charity at Lowe's. The cashier handed me a star to sign my name, I signed it and gave it back to her. She looked at me with disgust and asked what was wrong with me. I had to pull out my license to prove to her that my name is really Michael Myers. FML

Today, the play I was directing opened. The curtain opened, and my lead actor and actress weren't prepared. I could tell from the looks on their faces as the whole audience saw him balls deep in her, doggy style, on stage. FML

by headinabag33 / 02/14/2016 at 8:57pm / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I visited my 90-year-old great-grandmother and her boyfriend. This wouldn't be a problem, if this boyfriend wasn't different than the one she had yesterday. She told me not to tell him about "the other one". FML

by anon / 02/01/2016 at 11:37am / United States / Love

Today, I accidentally walked in on my sister shaving, naked. I don't know what's worse, the fact I've now seen her nude, or that she looks ten times better than any girl I've ever slept with. FML

by Anonymous / 01/31/2016 at 4:33am / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous

Today, I confronted my husband about a pair of panties I found in his office. They're his. He put them on to show me that they fit. FML

by Xandriajoy10 / 01/30/2016 at 10:44pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my dad decided I was too hairy and taught me to shave. This would be a great bonding experience if I weren't a girl. FML

by Anonymous / 01/30/2016 at 4:54pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend of 7 years. He thrusted as fast as rabbits. I waited years for 10 seconds. FML

by ShouldveStayedAVirgin / 01/13/2016 at 1:30pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, sewage came up the toilet and tub in my apartment and spread far enough to get into the hallway. The maintenance crew found the source of the blocked pipes to be a ten inch long weave some idiot flushed down a toilet. FML

by NeedsANewApartment / 01/13/2016 at 12:54am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I complained about period cramps. My boyfriend said periods can't be that bad since "girls must orgasm every time they put a tampon in." FML

by periods / 12/18/2015 at 11:37am / United States (California) / Love

Today, my wife knelt down in front me to give me a blowjob. As she took my underwear off a moth flew out of them. I've got no idea how it got there but I was cock-blocked by a moth. FML

by Moth_Balled / 12/14/2015 at 11:50pm / Australia / Intimacy

Today, while trying to calm down my four-year-old son who had a tantrum in a store, a man walked up to me and said, "You couldn't have worn the condom?" FML

by jshsnan / 10/04/2015 at 7:12pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I brought a boy home for the first time, only to have my dad ask him what his mother's maiden name was. When he answered, my dad exclaimed, "Oh yeah! I think I dated her in high school. I could be your father!" FML

by meunluckycharms / 09/14/2015 at 3:54pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I had to create another signature. I have to use one at the bank and the other around my mother, so that when she tries to cash my paychecks the bank won't let her. FML

by Why / 09/03/2015 at 3:54pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I discovered that my 100-pound Rottweiler is absolutely terrified of (drumroll please) orange peels. Yup. A byproduct of my lunch will turn this hulking monolith with teeth into a whimpering puddle of pee. FML

by pansypup / 09/02/2015 at 10:30pm / United States (New Mexico) / Animals

Today, a customer service guy called to fix a problem I've been having with my phone. When it transpired that he couldn't help, he transferred me to another representative. This other representative ended up being a John Deere dealer in Michigan. FML

by NotBuyingATractor / 09/01/2015 at 10:26pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous