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EmeraldMoonshine

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EmeraldMoonshine

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 610
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About EmeraldMoonshine : im 17. a senior in high school. im a dancer. message me if you wanna talk, im friendly (:
kik: ask for it (: instagram: esmeraldaluna22 you should go follow me (:

EmeraldMoonshine's page activity

Visits<b>Capriciousfox</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 12:29am<b>sweetestname</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 10:02pm<b>tfriend3</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 12:08pm<b>MarcoLoco</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 10:44pm<b>ironhead</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 1:44pm<b>marleypuckpuck</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 1:43pm<b>totallybananas</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 12:41am<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 9:35pm<b>icall</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 1:04am<b>Lebeaugars95</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 2:26am<b>bingo__O</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 1:26pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 8:41am<b>Adam5858</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 8:14am<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 5:31pm<b>Faithilicious123</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 12:20pm<b>Kirito_Kazuto</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 11:04am<b>volton22</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 9:40am<b>captaincarlz</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 10:38pm

EmeraldMoonshine's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of EmeraldMoonshine's badges

EmeraldMoonshine's favorite FMLs

Today, I discovered that one of our cats is super creepy. He humps the blankets on my mother's bed while staring at her while she's sleeping. FML

#21257305
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34587) - you deserved it (2947)

On 09/13/2014 at 2:56am - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my college did a fire drill, and instructions were given by intercom in English and Spanish. The guy beside me mused: "If they say it in English and Mexican, why not say it in Black too?" That guy is my idiot brother, and he was dead serious. Sometimes I think our parents are related. FML

#21257016
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33554) - you deserved it (2694)

On 09/12/2014 at 4:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I came home early to surprise my wife. No, it's not what you're thinking: I didn't find her cheating on me. She wasn't even home, but my dad was. He'd used his spare key and was on my sofa, drinking my beer and watching my TV. The first words out of his mouth? "Your beer's shit." FML

#21253167
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36069) - you deserved it (3536)

On 09/06/2014 at 5:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I came home early to surprise my wife. No, it's not what you're thinking: I didn't find her cheating on me. She wasn't even home, but my dad was. He'd used his spare key and was on my sofa, drinking my beer and watching my TV. The first words out of his mouth? "Your beer's shit." FML

#21253167
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36069) - you deserved it (3536)

On 09/06/2014 at 5:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML

Today, someone, and I still can't figure out who, switched my shampoo with mayonnaise. FML

#21249696
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37624) - you deserved it (3373)

On 09/01/2014 at 12:59pm - misc - by mayoshampoo - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was woken up by my wife softly kissing me on the lips. Half asleep, I kissed her back, before quickly opening my eyes and realising it wasn't my wife; it was my dog. FML

#21246644
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35357) - you deserved it (6384)

On 08/27/2014 at 7:04pm - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

#21245451
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50391) - you deserved it (9707)

On 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm - health - by whotouchedyou1 - United States (Texas)

Today, I overheard my dad say "Last time I didn't use a condom, I ended up with Steven, so for god's sake use 'em." I'm Steven. FML

#21244545
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37904) - you deserved it (2831)

On 08/24/2014 at 5:19pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44365) - you deserved it (7534)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when we heard a screech. My two cats were having it harder than us. FML

#21241441
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41677) - you deserved it (5380)

On 08/20/2014 at 2:07am - intimacy - by Mia (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went to a baseball game with my girlfriend's dad. I got a boner when they sang the anthem, because that's what I sing in my head when having sex with his daughter so I last longer. FML

#21240482
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43056) - you deserved it (16151)

On 08/18/2014 at 12:39pm - intimacy - by embarrassed - United States (New York)

Today, a few minutes after giving birth to our fourth child, my wife pulled me close and whispered, "I love you, but if you ever put me through that again I'll rip your balls off." Everyone laughed. FML

#21239517
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42255) - you deserved it (13707)

On 08/17/2014 at 2:15am - kids - by you ripped them off ages ago (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, while I was at the dentist, I couldn't stop gagging when he tried to put a tab in my mouth to get an x-ray. As I left, I overheard him saying, "I feel sorry for her boyfriend." FML

#21238932
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47489) - you deserved it (7658)

On 08/16/2014 at 12:03pm - intimacy - by gag reflex - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my professor told everyone that he thinks all med students should be required to get a catheter and an enema at least once in their lives so they can relate to their patients, saying, "Gentlemen, it might change your lives." FML

#21236595
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33717) - you deserved it (5751)

On 08/13/2014 at 11:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)



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