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Today, my parents took me on a plane ride for a vacation in Hong Kong. What they didn't tell me was that the "vacation" is extended for three years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35037) - you deserved it (2014)
Today, I got a completely random boner at a coffee shop, five seconds before two attractive women asked me to stand up and take their picture. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29041) - you deserved it (3841)
On 07/25/2011 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I went out for coffee with my sister and my crush. I spent the majority of the date flirting with my crush, and when he dropped us off at home, I told him I had fun on our date. He looked at me surprised and said he'd thought I'd tagged along on his date with my sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31791) - you deserved it (5920)
On 07/24/2011 at 1:02pm - love - by Lonely (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was doing swimming practice at the pool. I suddenly got breathless, dizzy, and felt like I was drowning. I cried out to the instructor, telling him I had a weak heart. He shouted back, "I don't care about your girlfriend's problems! Swim, bitch!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (33730) - you deserved it (3972) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 07/23/2011 at 7:52pm - love - by mathii - Sent from mobile version
Today, I accidentally deep throated a fork. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13541) - you deserved it (23581)
On 07/17/2011 at 3:15pm - intimacy - by CaoiiBieber - Ireland
Today, I found my mother in tears, so I asked her what was wrong. She told me, "It's your father, he wants a divorce..." I asked if he'd met another woman, and my mom replied "No, not a woman..." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42018) - you deserved it (3296) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 03/05/2011 at 6:43am - love - by Anonymous - France (Alsace)
Today, while watching Animal Planet, I realised my boyfriend uses the Dog Whisperer techniques on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22582) - you deserved it (6714)
On 02/28/2011 at 5:55am - love - by notagoodsign (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)
Today, a guy who I have known for a long time confessed his love to me. It would have been sweet except that he will become my stepbrother in 3 days. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26465) - you deserved it (1994)
On 02/26/2011 at 9:03am - love - by welcometothefamily - United States (Georgia)
Today, my husband's daughter told us that she's 5 months pregnant. I'm going to be a step grandmother and I'm only 23 years old. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14340) - you deserved it (31889)
On 10/26/2009 at 12:27am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML
I agree, your life sucks (148986) - you deserved it (22373)
On 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm - kids - by ....... (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my son said, "Mommy, sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replied, "Well, honey, that's normal and okay." I then asked when it happens, to which he said, "Well, sometimes when watching Scooby Doo and Shaggy comes out dressed in lady clothes." FML
I agree, your life sucks (255552) - you deserved it (35229)
On 03/20/2009 at 12:15am - kids - by ScoobieDoo (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I texted my college boyfriend to tell him how terrible I felt about cheating. He replied saying he was so relieved because he had been cheating on me with a girl in his dorm. I was talking about my math exam. FML
I agree, your life sucks (377430) - you deserved it (54145)
On 03/16/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by gentileman (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I forgot to do my French homework, but since it was an online worksheet, I told my teacher my internet wasn't working. I told her with an e-mail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44493) - you deserved it (517571)
On 02/28/2009 at 2:07pm - misc - by ihavepinkbackpac (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I saw an elderly man fall in a crosswalk, so I jumped off my bike to help. As I helped him across, the light turned green. I then watched across a 6 lane street as someone stole my bike. FML
I agree, your life sucks (569083) - you deserved it (51257)
On 02/20/2009 at 3:29am - misc - by Mick (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (147868) - you deserved it (55386)
On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)
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