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Ellyo's favorite FMLs
by AnDroidZ_BabY / 09/11/2011 at 12:47am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/10/2011 at 3:21pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
by asianlover / 06/30/2011 at 3:24am / Finland (Western Finland) / Miscellaneous
by coolbeans123 / 05/10/2011 at 12:37pm / Singapore / Animals
Today, I sent a kinky text message to my boyfriend. Within minutes I got a reply of 'whoever this is, fuck off and give my girlfriend's phone back.' Apparently I'm so bad at writing sexy messages that my boyfriend thought it was a prank from someone who'd stolen my phone. FML
by killercow / 04/19/2011 at 12:19pm / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous
Today, my husband sent an email invite to his family about our daughter's upcoming birthday. Upon reading the email, his aunt clicked "reply all" while emailing her husband and said, "I'd rather say we're out of town than see that dumb bitch our nephew calls his wife." FML
by smbcolorado / 02/04/2011 at 5:43pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to the ER after a fall. Before the nurse did an X-Ray, she gave me a pregnancy test. It came back negative. I joked "No martians have crawled into my uterus, then?" She didn't get it, and I had my head scanned for brain trauma. Never crack a joke in a hospital. FML
by Anonymous / 01/17/2011 at 9:08pm / United States (New York) / Health
by Anonymous / 12/26/2010 at 1:10am / United States / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 12/10/2010 at 6:59pm / United States (California) / Love
Today, I went to see a famous rapper perform. My girlfriend got us up to the front to get pictures with him. He went to give me a high-five, I thought it was a fist-bump, so I made a fist. So he made a fist while I made a palm to match his retracted high-five. Then I panicked, cupped his fist and ran. FML
by blackitalian / 11/26/2010 at 10:43am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/17/2010 at 9:32pm / United States (Virginia) / Love
by Anonymous / 11/13/2010 at 2:14am / United States / Intimacy
- Today, my boyfriend whispered to me, “I’m so tired of these fucking mosquitos.” When I asked why he… Today, I’m a French teacher abroad, and as my beard has a huge hole near my chin, my students call… Today, a car almost hit me. Since I wasn’t hurt, the driver chased me with a baseball bat to finish…