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EllieB123

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EllieB123
  • Town/Country : Houston, Texas, USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 1 May 1992 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 1347
  • Number of comments : 48
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About EllieB123 : Hello hello hello!
Ellie is the name, keep it out of your mouth please(:
I'm half Italian & half Russian, which means don't fuck with me.
I love meeting new people, so message me and we'll talk(:

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EllieB123's favorite FMLs

Today, I repaired a boiler for a wealthy guy in a big house. While there, I fixed a leaking tap for free. When I went to go, the man slipped something into my shirt pocket and said "have a drink on me." When I got to my truck, I discovered that he'd given me a tea bag. FML

#598491
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66199) - you deserved it (4903)

On 03/25/2009 at 12:33pm - misc - by toast - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I jokingly had kinky conversation via text message with a good guy friend. He was pretending to be a stranger and was fishing for compliments and asked to have a foursome. Turns out, my friend lost his phone and I spent 2 hours talking to a pervert about what lingerie I was wearing. FML

#370215
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43717) - you deserved it (30200)

On 03/16/2009 at 1:26am - misc - by textraped (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend and I were choosing animals that reminded us of eachother. I said he reminded me of a tiger because he is really muscular. He told me I reminded him of a zebra. When I asked him why, he said it was because of my stretchmarks. FML

#304824
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68728) - you deserved it (6494)

On 03/13/2009 at 4:03pm - love - by Noname (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

#253938
1625 comments

I agree, your life sucks (471140) - you deserved it (585029)

On 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm - intimacy - by RC3Welly (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my daughter asked me when was the first time I had sex. After I told her 22 she quickly shouted, "Beat ya!" She's thirteen. FML

#226342
700 comments

I agree, your life sucks (361370) - you deserved it (67412)

On 03/06/2009 at 2:04pm - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I asked my girlfriend when she would give me a blowjob. She replied, "you know that won't happen, I'm a vegetarian." FML

#195442
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55855) - you deserved it (24235)

On 03/03/2009 at 1:29pm - intimacy - by Sal (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was walking through Borders with my girlfriend, when we pass a girl scout cookies stand. I see a box of Samoas, my favorite, point at them, and shout, 'YEAH'. My girlfriend looks shocked. Behind the box of cookies was a five year old scout bending over, with her bottom pointed at me. FML

#170218
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47195) - you deserved it (11856)

On 03/01/2009 at 12:55pm - misc - by Scottrick (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I met a guy at a bar and we went back to my room. We start having sex and about 30 seconds in he stops and says it's not right - he likes me too much for a one night stand. He gives me his number, a kiss on the cheek and leaves. Turns out he already came. I call his phone - wrong number. FML

#139747
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67978) - you deserved it (15085)

On 02/25/2009 at 11:51pm - intimacy - by jsw029 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
484 comments

I agree, your life sucks (182974) - you deserved it (61949)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was lying on the bed with my boyfriend. We were watching his cell phone when an automatic reminder message came on the screen: "Do not forget to tell a lie to babe about going out this Friday". FML

#13
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (86581) - you deserved it (10979)

On 10/13/2008 at 4:23am - love - by Sarah91 -



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