Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

EllieB123

Search for a member

EllieB123

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 1 May 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1990
  • Number of comments : 48
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About EllieB123 : Hello hello hello!
Ellie is the name, keep it out of your mouth please(:
I'm half Italian & half Russian, which means don't fuck with me.
I love meeting new people, so message me and we'll talk(:

EllieB123's page activity

Visits<b>alienpotatochips</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 4:27pm<b>ashleylove0525</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 5:59pm<b>tabbydionysis</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 3:58am<b>abdirahman4578</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 3:32pm<b>qwerty401</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 2:59am<b>CarlosDanger</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 4:31pm<b>cosmo_love</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 12:15am<b>Mons</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 12:18pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 6:41pm<b>xDochx</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 2:28am<b>LONERANGER44</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 10:18pm<b>Squtchy</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 12:54am<b>poulkrebs</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 12:59am<b>Pedregon30</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 5:10pm<b>SuperJay2806</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 6:16pm<b>accidentalsheep</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 5:42pm<b>aerybow</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 2:09pm<b>odessarose</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 1:33pm

EllieB123's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of EllieB123's badges

EllieB123's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my 3 year old daughter to behave or I'd spank her. She looked right at me and said "Bring it." FML

#13026235
416 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31065) - you deserved it (28079)

On 09/12/2010 at 9:38pm - kids - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I heard two of my students having a conversation. One asked what state Arizona was in, and the other replied Canada. I teach sixth grade social studies and they weren't joking. FML

#12837057
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31985) - you deserved it (7731)

On 08/31/2010 at 10:50am - kids - by teacher (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I pretended like I was dead to my 4 year old brother. He cried my name for a couple of seconds, then took my iPhone out of my hands and ran away laughing. FML

#12760646
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13100) - you deserved it (38677)

On 08/26/2010 at 8:19pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after church, my 5-year-old son asked me about God, so I answered his questions in full. We talked about God for over 2 hours. At the end of it all, he pondered for a moment, before saying to me "That's the stupidest thing I ever heard. You're dumb." FML

#9721953
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24717) - you deserved it (55514)

On 04/08/2010 at 12:27am - kids - by bleredoshia (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, after months of hardcore flirting with this incredibly attractive guy, he invited me to hang out. At which point he introduced me to his boyfriend. FML

#7239167
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33463) - you deserved it (6842)

On 01/09/2010 at 4:26pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was driving in the left lane and was suddenly hit by a woman who was in the right lane. I ran off the road, taking out a fence and totaling my car. When the cops asked the woman what happened she responded, "My tom-tom told me to turn left." FML

#5167647
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48839) - you deserved it (2206)

On 09/10/2009 at 12:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Montana)

Today, my boyfriend and I were starting to get in the mood. I get on top of him, lean down to kiss him, and he begins to laugh. Puzzled, I ask him why. He tells me that when I'm naked and on top of him, I remind him of a cow, with 'udders' . Offended, I go to get off. 'No no' he protests, 'a SEXY cow'. FML

#4936228
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33242) - you deserved it (4747)

On 08/30/2009 at 7:35pm - intimacy - by sigh (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, my mom walks into my room, with a serious look on her face asks me "When a man is getting it from behind, the man on top orgasms, but what happens to the man on bottom? Do you think he takes care of himself or what?" Hand motions were included. FML

#2736001
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78413) - you deserved it (5089)

On 06/09/2009 at 4:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had my first job interview and didn't have much of an appetite because of the nerves. So I grabbed a brownie that my roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into my interview I was so stoned I couldn't speak. FML

#1550190
357 comments

I agree, your life sucks (177610) - you deserved it (45658)

On 05/02/2009 at 2:28am - work - by Dunzo15 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my friend and I were seeing a movie. We ended up sitting next to a man who was continually laughing, clapping, and bouncing up and down on his seat. Extremely annoyed, we turned to him and told him to "shut the fuck up". Turns out he had downs syndrome and ran out of the theater crying. FML

#1010714
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25075) - you deserved it (139674)

On 04/16/2009 at 1:08am - misc - by katem (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I took the bus to work. A sweet old lady got on after and sat next to me. Halfway there, she fell asleep, her head on my shoulder. I gently tried to wake her up before my stop. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML

#960425
683 comments

I agree, your life sucks (696609) - you deserved it (55864)

On 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by meteorbabe0101 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was working as a manager of the local movie theater. This six year old came in with no parents or anyone else. When I asked him where his parents were he looked at me and said, "Shut up white boy, I don't have to listen to your shit." I just got told by a six year old. FML

#958764
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60834) - you deserved it (6887)

On 04/13/2009 at 8:44pm - work - by brad3720 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend and I were watching TV. She starts to undo my belt buckle, unzips my fly and then takes my pants off. Right as I'm starting to get really excited, she says to me, "Just joking." FML

#946704
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (147478) - you deserved it (21605)

On 04/13/2009 at 9:44am - intimacy - by Hikara (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I realized my friends and I should be more careful what we say around my younger brother. I never thought he was paying attention until today. My stepmom told him it was time to go to bed. He responded, "I think it's time for you to suck one." My brother is 4. FML

#615927
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15978) - you deserved it (70488)

On 03/26/2009 at 12:42am - misc - by Alex (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was texting two people at once. Trying to respond to my friend's text, I accidentally clicked on this guy's name instead, who I've never met. He just told me about his grandma's funeral he went to that was an open casket. I responded with, "Haha wow you slut, I'm sure you were aroused." FML



Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML
  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you have any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

Friday 19 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: