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About EllieB123 : Hello hello hello!
Ellie is the name, keep it out of your mouth please(:
I'm half Italian & half Russian, which means don't fuck with me.
I love meeting new people, so message me and we'll talk(:
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Today, I realized just how much my bad sex life has started affecting me, when after not being able to climax from masturbating, I instinctively faked an orgasm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9485) - you deserved it (2273)
On 09/20/2011 at 6:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia
Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27496) - you deserved it (3356)
On 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by IbetIgotAIDS (man) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I realized too late that a picture in my school Powerpoint presentation of thousands of New Zealand sheep, was actually a picture of thousands of naked men in a field. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11712) - you deserved it (20893)
On 09/10/2011 at 3:11am - misc - by FullOfNick (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I reached the point in my life where Target is the "expensive" store. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23424) - you deserved it (2604)
On 08/31/2011 at 9:55pm - money - by anti88 (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was bored and all alone while cleaning at work. This led me to start passionately doing a ballet dance in the empty corridor. I promptly stopped as I remembered the surveillance cameras. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6551) - you deserved it (3071)
On 08/16/2011 at 12:55pm - work - by secret dancer (woman) - Sweden (Jonkopings Lan)
Today, I woke up face-down in my grandfather's driveway, soaking wet with no pants, glitter in my hair, and holding an empty Skippy peanut butter jar. No one will tell me what happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25859) - you deserved it (14618)
On 05/19/2011 at 9:38pm - misc - by Devon (man) - United States (Vermont)
Today, my girlfriend kindly let me know that she didn't care that I am 'below average' in the penis department because it will leave her nice and tight for her next boyfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54233) - you deserved it (5563)
On 04/27/2011 at 12:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom
Today, my husband of 30 years told me that he thought we should 'just be friends'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49110) - you deserved it (3117)
On 04/15/2011 at 7:38am - love - by ZaraAce (woman) - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)
Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML
I agree, your life sucks (39954) - you deserved it (6218)
Today, a guy who I have known for a long time confessed his love to me. It would have been sweet except that he will become my stepbrother in 3 days. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26465) - you deserved it (1994)
On 02/26/2011 at 9:03am - love - by welcometothefamily - United States (Georgia)
Today, I got a call from my daughter’s teacher asking me to come pick her up. My daughter wouldn’t tell her what was wrong. I left an important work meeting. When I got there she stated her boyfriend broke up with her and she couldn't emotionally make it through the rest of the day. She's 5. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43041) - you deserved it (5485)
On 02/08/2011 at 12:46pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31415) - you deserved it (20273) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins
Today, I received a call from child care. Apparently, my four year-old boy tried to start a mosh pit during naptime. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22534) - you deserved it (5754)
On 12/22/2010 at 6:43am - kids - by lerouxmaster -
Today, my parents held an intervention for me. Apparently they think I'm turning into a goth. All because they saw me re-lacing my shoes with black shoelaces instead of white ones. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21267) - you deserved it (1879)
On 12/14/2010 at 6:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nebraska)
Today, my boyfriend of eleven months broke up with me, but adamantly insisted I didn't move out of our apartment, because he can't pay the rent alone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20410) - you deserved it (2472)
On 12/05/2010 at 7:48am - love - by Jaded618 - United States
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