Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ElizabethNL93

Offline (the 06/10/2014 at 10:27pm) | Search for a member

ElizabethNL93

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 11 January 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 478
  • Number of comments : 104
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About ElizabethNL93 : Hey, all! Just call me Liz. I discovered FML.com a few years ago and have been addicted ever since.

ElizabethNL93's page activity

Visits<b>maddiealexx_</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 7:17am<b>nineteen99</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 5:50pm<b>pplthinkimbad</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 9:16pm<b>SoliDSt33L</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 10:58pm<b>captenawesome</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 9:52pm<b>Eyeslick</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 9:40am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 10:03am<b>SnowFangedBeauty</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 12:04am<b>Juicenub</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 10:36am<b>Sebastian2022</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 10:07pm<b>Fidge86</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 2:53pm<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 4:42pm<b>YoshiEgg</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 1:55pm<b>tallwhiteguy96</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 9:23pm<b>kahraman20</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 5:35am<b>jerbear939</b> - the 12/26/2013 at 1:07pm<b>Wolvander88</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 11:15pm<b>vendris</b> - the 12/24/2013 at 11:09pm

ElizabethNL93's FML badges

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

See all of ElizabethNL93's badges

ElizabethNL93's favorite FMLs

Today, I picked off what I thought was a small bug feeding on my skin. I was wrong. It was a mole. I spent the last 30 minutes trying to stop the continuous bleeding. FML

#17514634
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22808) - you deserved it (9628)

On 08/18/2011 at 11:22pm - health - by c.hip - United States (California)

Today, while working at Kohl's this woman came up to me and asked if I was Native American, I said yes, she then says "Oh! I thought you guys went extinct." This is the country I live in. FML

#17297056
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42645) - you deserved it (3335)

On 07/29/2011 at 11:18am - work - by crazygirl12 - United States (Missouri)

Today, I laughed when I saw my ex-girlfriend in her overall uniform, thinking she'd got a job as a janitor. Turns out she's as professional marine welder. She's 22 years old and earns my monthly salary in three days. My current girlfriend who was there with me called me a loser in front of her. FML

#16982648
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11027) - you deserved it (56879)

On 07/05/2011 at 3:06am - love - by eatmywords (man) - Singapore

Today, I found a very large pumpkin super-glued to my car. It will not come off. FML

#16943359
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32283) - you deserved it (3128)

On 07/02/2011 at 12:46am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my brother got a pet ferret. He told me it had a flexible spine, so I bent it backwards. It farted, and clawed my face. FML

#16908147
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10130) - you deserved it (77807)

On 06/29/2011 at 10:55am - misc - by ashleyrae (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my friend pushed me into the swimming pool. Unfortunately, we were eight feet away from the actual pool, so I face-planted and rolled in. FML

#16510311
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36432) - you deserved it (3298)

On 06/05/2011 at 3:00am - misc - by kyle - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was making love to my wife from behind. As we both reached climax at the same time, she threw her head back in ecstasy just as I buckled forward with pleasure. We slammed our heads together, effectively ending our orgasms. FML

#15636235
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39709) - you deserved it (10961)

On 04/04/2011 at 2:29pm - intimacy - by Abyssal (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML

#15539670
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46133) - you deserved it (15415)

On 03/28/2011 at 11:33pm - love - by ouch - United States (Arizona)

Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML

#15472026
410 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48695) - you deserved it (8012)

On 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm - misc - by omg - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I started lessons on snowboarding. As soon as I got to the top of the hill, my instructor pushed me saying, "Just believe, it'll come to you!" He said this just before I hit a tree, breaking my nose. FML

#15133250
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25320) - you deserved it (2927)

On 02/27/2011 at 12:07am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my husband ran at me, groaning like a zombie. I was so startled that I screamed, punched him, and started sobbing. Now he won't talk to me because this is 'the first step on the road of domestic violence'. FML

#14142147
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27224) - you deserved it (10426)

On 12/09/2010 at 12:15pm - love - by katy (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my wonderful boyfriend asked me if I wanted him to cook me scrambled eggs with sausage for breakfast. When I said yes, he pulled out his junk, and started shaking it violently in my face. FML

#14058992
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34282) - you deserved it (9472)

On 12/02/2010 at 10:54am - intimacy - by sissydlk (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to see a famous rapper perform. My girlfriend got us up to the front to get pictures with him. He went to give me a high-five, I thought it was a fist-bump, so I made a fist. So he made a fist while I made a palm to match his retracted high-five. Then I panicked, cupped his fist and ran. FML

#13986029
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11906) - you deserved it (27483)

On 11/26/2010 at 10:43am - misc - by blackitalian - United States

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

#12677495
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41751) - you deserved it (12571)

On 08/22/2010 at 2:58am - kids - by Bailey - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my best friend thought it would look cool if I recorded her swinging while lying under the swing. She ended up kicking me in the face and laughing so hard she pissed on me. FML

#12522582
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34229) - you deserved it (18563)

On 08/14/2010 at 4:43pm - love - by Anonymous - United States



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: