About Eire17 : Hi, I'm Kelsie. I love Florence + the Machine, Halestorm, and Of Monsters and Men. Message me if you want to know more. :)
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Eire17's favorite FMLs
Today, I started doing it again. I'd given up for years, but when I saw the pack I just couldn't help myself. One taste was enough to make me finish off the whole pack. Nobody knows that I've fallen off the wagon and I'm so ashamed of myself. Today, I began eating my cat's biscuits again. FML
by Aliiiice / 07/16/2013 at 9:18am / France (Haute-Normandie) / Health
Today, I let my 3-year-old daughter watch Finding Nemo on my phone while I made her lunch. I returned to find she had dropped my phone into the fish bowl so that her goldfish could see his friends. FML
by thanks, Nemo. / 07/11/2013 at 7:13pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids
by Anonymous / 07/11/2013 at 3:09pm / United States (Nebraska) / Miscellaneous
Today, my therapist told me to write any negative thoughts that I had on a piece of paper and then set fire to it. When I lit it in the trash can, huge flames broke out and I had to throw the trash can out my window to keep from setting my house on fire. FML
by Anonymous / 07/11/2013 at 3:10am / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous
by whowhat / 07/11/2013 at 2:26am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, a coworker complimented me on losing weight, and said that she wished she could drop a few pounds too. I was too embarrassed to tell her that the only reason I've lost weight is because I haven't been able to afford to eat. FML
by shouldbehappyiguess / 07/11/2013 at 2:20am / United States (Florida) / Work
by Wtf / 07/10/2013 at 1:24am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at another long swim-meet, when my daughter shaved 15 seconds off her record swim time. When I asked her how she did it, she replied, "Well someone told me to swim as fast as I can." She's just been taking her time all these years. FML
by Anonymous / 07/02/2013 at 12:25pm / United States (Vermont) / Kids
by Anonymous / 07/01/2013 at 12:10pm / United States (Utah) / Animals
Today, it's been weeks since some asshat started placing gnomes in my front and back yards. I resorted to setting up cameras, which I thought had deterred the idiot, until I walked into my kitchen this morning and found two gnomes on the counter. Nothing on the tapes. I'm freaking out here. FML
by ilivealoneandwhatthefuck / 06/23/2013 at 1:02pm / Guam / Miscellaneous
by kittybad / 06/23/2013 at 1:05am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend used the "this isn't working, we need to talk" line on me. How nice of him to wait this long to do so, just days after we returned from the expensive Caribbean holiday that I paid for. FML
by sadpoorlady / 06/22/2013 at 5:22am / United Kingdom (Lancashire) / Holidays
by Anonymous / 06/18/2013 at 7:22pm / United States (Connecticut) / Kids
by idontwanttoknow / 06/16/2013 at 7:37am / United States / Intimacy
- Today, on my way home to Bordeaux after a weekend in Paris, I had the pleasure of being sat next to… Today, I travelled in a shared taxi on the winding roads of the Peruvian Andes. The guy next to me… Today, I was talking with my slightly skinflint girlfriend, who just moved in with me. “I think you…