About Eff_Itt : seventeen ; female ; accident prone ; taken
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Today, I saw a video of me last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40096) - you deserved it (123067)
On 08/20/2009 at 10:39am - misc - by ShiriSarah (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I saw a video of me last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40096) - you deserved it (123067)
On 08/20/2009 at 10:39am - misc - by ShiriSarah (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I was looking over the schedule for errors and circled a group of mistakes before handing it to my manager. When she handed it back to me, she gave me a weird look and I immediately noticed that the group of numbers I had circled formed a giant penis shape on the paper. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32900) - you deserved it (708)
On 08/14/2009 at 1:01pm - work - by dumblond (woman) - United States (Maine)
Today, I was picking my daughter up at day care. She was outside playing kick ball. A red ball rolls over to me, and trying to impress the kids, I kicked it over the slide. I turn around to see three crying six year olds. It was their hamster ball. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24475) - you deserved it (65191)
On 08/05/2009 at 1:10pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tree!" He then continued to latch onto me for a good five minutes pretending to eat my hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (91568) - you deserved it (27417)
On 07/26/2009 at 1:57am - love - by treegirl (woman) - United States
Today, I found out that my boyfriend is cheating on me, with the same guy I was cheating on him with. FML
I agree, your life sucks (58591) - you deserved it (156885)
On 07/03/2009 at 10:16am - misc - by shandrith (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my mom put some bubblewrap on my desk because she thought I would have fun with it. I'm 18. It was awesome. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59006) - you deserved it (30957)
On 06/26/2009 at 2:13am - misc - by Jeweler (man) - United States (California)
Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML
I agree, your life sucks (177828) - you deserved it (25395)
On 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm - kids - by ....... (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, In my science class I sit next to my friend Jill. My teacher always gets our names confused calling me Jill and her Liz. She decided to combine our names. I'm now known as Jizz. My teacher clearly has no idea what it means. FML
I agree, your life sucks (113473) - you deserved it (6692)
On 06/12/2009 at 2:50pm - misc - by mcullen21 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my car was in the shop so I borrowed my wife's VW Beetle convertible. It's really embarrassing because it's a girlie car and it's full of little stuffed animals. At a stop light a man asked me if I'd like to borrow one of his testicles because "every man should have at least one." FML
I agree, your life sucks (81139) - you deserved it (15206)
On 06/11/2009 at 8:23pm - misc - by NoBalls (man) - United States (Indiana)
Today, after practicing a song for my girlfriend on guitar all day, I called her over to my house to show it to her. After a long speech about how "this is for you," I played for about 3 seconds before I broke a string, which slapped her in her face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55580) - you deserved it (4410)
On 05/06/2009 at 4:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (New Brunswick)
Today, I left a party after drinking, and was soon pulled over. I frantically grabbed my mouthwash I keep for emergency situations to cover up the alcohol smell on my breath. I was given the breathalyzer almost immediately. I blew a 2.37. Apparently, alcohol is the main ingredient of Listerine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19875) - you deserved it (197810)
On 05/02/2009 at 2:21am - health - by breathalizard (man) - United States (North Dakota)
Today, I was working out out at the gym doing squats. There was a girl there that I wanted to impress so I loaded up the bar with a lot of weight and began to do my squat. As I was going down I farted so loud that I began to laugh and fell backwards. Everyone in the room just stared at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16704) - you deserved it (55088)
On 03/30/2009 at 3:06am - misc - by Mark (man) - United States
Today, I was getting sick of listening to the guy in the next room over getting nasty with some girl, so I called my girlfriend to see if she wanted to go get some food. Then I heard her phone ring. Through the wall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (364523) - you deserved it (20244)
On 03/28/2009 at 4:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (42617) - you deserved it (485679)
On 03/21/2009 at 12:46am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Monday 20 May 2013
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