Eff_Itt

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Offline (the 04/11/2016 at 6:39am)

Eff_Itt

29Fucked!

Eff_IttEff_Itt
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 21 January 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2521
  • Number of comments : 23
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About Eff_Itt : Gym, music, Pokémon, and pizza = life 👌

Eff_Itt's page activity

Visits<b>Jayroc</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 9:28pm<b>Rintarok5</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 3:06am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 12:20am<b>HoboRain</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 6:59pm<b>LoneWolf2879</b> - the 04/15/2016 at 9:40am<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 7:21pm<b>heroqucas</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 5:36am<b>AceCharmander</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 3:11am<b>McPerrier</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 1:31am<b>im_a_squid</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 1:22am<b>JordanODST</b> - the 03/19/2016 at 9:24pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 03/16/2016 at 6:10am<b>Cacksonic</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 2:18am<b>sosaman</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 8:57pm<b>JoshTheTacoMan</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 9:23pm<b>smittywt</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 4:14am<b>MM100</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 12:22pm<b>Taymoo1515</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 12:59am

Fucked!<b>Rintarok5</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 9:05am<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 6:18am<b>AceCharmander</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 2:44pm<b>JoshTheTacoMan</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 3:23am<b>single_20</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 8:55am<b>Kamorka</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 11:34am<b>JMCJester69</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 3:04pm<b>krazy789</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 1:26am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 7:57pm<b>Jayjaybrews</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 11:23pm<b>Nahpets</b> - the 10/23/2015 at 5:21pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 10/22/2015 at 3:55pm<b>gary8082</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 3:19am<b>Bhuffman94</b> - the 09/13/2015 at 4:19pm<b>robertd73</b> - the 09/12/2015 at 11:41am<b>Soldierman</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 7:50am<b>wellimaginger</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 7:47am<b>Sangue0608</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 9:20pm

Eff_Itt's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of Eff_Itt's badges

Eff_Itt's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

by Anonymous / 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm / Romania (Bucuresti) / Intimacy

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

by Anonymous / 06/07/2013 at 3:10am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Just as I was about to orgasm, he pulled away and said that my vagina is like a mask and that he feels like Bane from Batman. He's been talking in a Bane voice to my vagina for 30 minutes now. I guess sex is over. FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2013 at 11:34am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I went on a date with a very cute girl. It went well, until I accidentally called the blueberries in her dessert Oran Berries. I sheepishly explained that they're a berry from the Pokémon universe, at which point she excused herself, never to return. FML

by Brock / 02/02/2013 at 4:20pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Love

Today, during my first day as a medical intern in a new ward, I was performing a rectal exam. My supervisor thought it would be funny to burst into the room and scream, "Who are you?! You don't even work here, you pervert!" FML

by dr mamour / 01/30/2013 at 4:57pm / Love

Today, I blew a huge gum bubble. My cat was on my lap and decided to shove her face in the bubble. There's gum all over her, and I still have scars from the last time I tried bathe her. FML

by Anonymous / 01/29/2013 at 12:41pm / United States (Iowa) / Animals

Today, it's been two months since I got a kitten. He loves to hide, and then surprise me by jumping out of his hiding place. It was quite a surprise when he launched himself out of my bag during class. FML

by Kitten_Love / 01/28/2013 at 2:52pm / Animals

Today, I came home to find my girlfriend crying. Concerned, I quickly asked her what was wrong. She told me tearfully that she couldn't understand why her pet lizards hadn’t grown into dinosaurs yet, and that pet store had cheated her. I’m still concerned now, but for entirely different reasons. FML

Today, my boyfriend yet again decided to act like Edward Cullen from Twilight, and got his friend to act like Jacob. Every time they're around, my boyfriend always looks stoned and constipated, and his friend is shirtless. I feel like I'm in a shitty romance movie. FML

by Bella / 01/15/2013 at 1:57pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, as every day for the past few weeks, my husband won't have sex. His reason? We've decided to have a baby, and he reckons that the longer he waits, the more competition there will be between his sperm and thus the better the result will be. FML

by Bouh / 12/26/2012 at 11:04pm / Love

Today, while at the store with my mom and baby brother, a guy started to talk to me. Just as he went to give me his number, my mom handed me my brother and said, "Here's your son, your AA meeting's in an hour, let's go." FML

by Anonymous / 12/26/2012 at 1:30pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was called into my 17-year-old son's high school. Why? Because it was Wednesday, also known as "Hump Day" and his friends managed to convince him that you're supposed to go around and hump people. FML

by Judy / 09/19/2012 at 7:33pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids

Today, I discovered that when a cyclist tears down the street, slaps you across the face as he passes, looks back laughing and flips you off, then crashes into a lamppost, he'll still blame you and threaten to sue, even after you rush over to check his injuries. FML

by dumbasdogshit / 08/10/2012 at 8:45pm / Australia (Queensland) / Health

Today, while at work, I used the restroom. After I noticed we were out of paper towels, I just tried shaking my hands dry. I then readjusted my bra, since it'd been driving me crazy all day. After getting back to my cubicle, I realized that I had two wet handprints over my boobs. FML

by Employee / 08/07/2012 at 3:17pm / United States (Nebraska) / Work

Today, my daughter's hamster pulled the water bottle off the glass, so I decided to super-glue the bottle back on. We came back an hour later to see if it had stuck, only to find both the bottle and rodent glued to the glass. FML

by mommabuser / 07/01/2012 at 11:59am / Animals