Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Eff_Itt

Online | Search for a member

Eff_Itt

0Liked!

Eff_IttEff_Itt
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 21 January 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1325
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About Eff_Itt : I'm just a simple, accident-prone young adult with alot of interesting stories (:

Eff_Itt's page activity

Visits<b>coolsoccer1234</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 12:44pm<b>Gokushivum</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 9:12pm<b>Atoraya96</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 10:10am<b>gantoman</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 10:32pm<b>DazeCat</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 6:44pm<b>lazyslumber</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 5:32pm<b>Death_The_Kid15</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 4:14pm<b>tylerbrynds</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 3:50pm<b>lifesentence</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 1:52pm<b>JoshTheTacoMan</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 1:37pm<b>Cacksonic</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 1:06pm<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 1:06pm<b>Almost_Positive</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 12:35pm<b>Wrex</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 9:42am<b>inner_peace</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 2:22am<b>KiddoKS</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 5:50pm<b>skillsatwork</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 7:27pm<b>lild343</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 12:03pm

Eff_Itt's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of Eff_Itt's badges

Eff_Itt's favorite FMLs

Today, while at the store with my mom and baby brother, a guy started to talk to me. Just as he went to give me his number, my mom handed me my brother and said, "Here's your son, your AA meeting's in an hour, let's go." FML

#20423578
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50195) - you deserved it (4729)

On 12/26/2012 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was called into my 17-year-old son's high school. Why? Because it was Wednesday, also known as "Hump Day" and his friends managed to convince him that you're supposed to go around and hump people. FML

#20079735
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21752) - you deserved it (2537)

On 09/19/2012 at 7:33pm - kids - by Judy - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I discovered that when a cyclist tears down the street, slaps you across the face as he passes, looks back laughing and flips you off, then crashes into a lamppost, he'll still blame you and threaten to sue, even after you rush over to check his injuries. FML

#20014116
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30743) - you deserved it (2123)

On 08/10/2012 at 8:45pm - health - by dumbasdogshit (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, while at work, I used the restroom. After I noticed we were out of paper towels, I just tried shaking my hands dry. I then readjusted my bra, since it'd been driving me crazy all day. After getting back to my cubicle, I realized that I had two wet handprints over my boobs. FML

#20007867
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17099) - you deserved it (10624)

On 08/07/2012 at 3:17pm - work - by Employee (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my daughter's hamster pulled the water bottle off the glass, so I decided to super-glue the bottle back on. We came back an hour later to see if it had stuck, only to find both the bottle and rodent glued to the glass. FML

#19875784
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7520) - you deserved it (24111)

On 07/01/2012 at 11:59am - animals - by mommabuser -

Today, I was joking around with my eight-year-old son. I told him to pull my finger. I farted, then laughed. He decided to try it on his mother. When she pulled his finger, he crapped his pants. He told her I taught him how to do it. FML

#19791702
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12790) - you deserved it (26600)

On 06/15/2012 at 10:21am - kids - by habbsrule - Canada

Today, my identical twin sister's boyfriend walked over to me, and whispered in my ear, "I know what you look like naked." FML

#19776975
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40888) - you deserved it (3874)

On 06/12/2012 at 2:28pm - misc - by creeped out - United States (New York)

Today, I took my girlfriend to a family dinner so she could meet my parents. Over the dinner, she asked my dad what's he's been up to since he retired. He replied, "recreational gynecology, my dear" and gave her a weird wink. FML

#19716339
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30998) - you deserved it (2615)

On 06/01/2012 at 4:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, in a rush to get my clothes back on at my girlfriend's house at the sound of her parents opening the front door, I forgot to take the condom off. Her dad watched it fall out of my pant leg and onto the kitchen floor. FML

#19710621
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19083) - you deserved it (39606)

On 05/31/2012 at 4:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was jumped and savagely beaten to the ground by a group of six-year-olds wearing Disney princess masks. FML

#19641324
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21292) - you deserved it (5800)

On 05/18/2012 at 10:13am - kids - by 23yearoldtoddler - United States

Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML

#19623439
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38018) - you deserved it (3972) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm - misc - by lafinesse (woman) -

Today, while sitting at a red light, I guiltily nibbled on a chocolate bar and looked around to make sure no one saw me cheating on my diet.  A police car pulled up, I panicked, stepped on the gas, and ran the light. FML

#19609899
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8648) - you deserved it (47920)

On 05/12/2012 at 12:27am - misc - by Snickers (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my husband is the biological father of my baby sister. FML

#19603084
411 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58770) - you deserved it (3192)

On 05/10/2012 at 4:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I shut my finger in the car door. The door locked. Then I dropped the keys on the ground and couldn't reach them. FML

#19579896
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29954) - you deserved it (2522)

On 05/06/2012 at 12:09am - health - by catherineratley - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was working at the local liquor store. An obviously drunk girl stumbles in, grabs two cases of beer and puts them on the counter. Then she grabs a pregnancy test, pees on it right there, shows me, and says, "I'm not pregnant, I want beer." FML

#19572319
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30668) - you deserved it (1920)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:08am - work - by viviham - United States (Texas)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: