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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was selected to give my speech to the entire school. I was later told it had to be censored because it was inappropriate, even though I was just trying to make a point. My speech was on political correctness. My speech on political correctness was censored for political reasons. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37946) - you deserved it (3394)
On 05/16/2009 at 9:06am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I scored two prime baseball tickets from a supplier at work. I phoned my dad to tell him the good news. He said that's great, my brother and him would love to see the game. I said, no, I'm taking you to the game. He told me I was being selfish and hung up the phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54543) - you deserved it (1802)
On 05/14/2009 at 10:17am - misc - by Hank (man) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, my football club gave us all jerseys with our last names on them. My last name is 'Flicker'. The letters are all in uppercase. And the 'L' and the 'I' are joined together at the bottom. My jersey reads 'FUCKER'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (97846) - you deserved it (8099)
On 05/14/2009 at 3:23am - misc - by Flicker (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, we were running late for school so my mum shouted at me to hurry up and get in the car. I put my school bags in the boot of the car and my mum drove off. It wasn't until she got to my school and told me to get out that she realised I wasn't there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45476) - you deserved it (2671)
On 05/13/2009 at 8:36am - misc - by albert (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, I cut down a dead tree in my yard. The top hit the ground and the base seesawed up in the air and came down on my head. I hit the ground like a sack of flour. Fortunately, the wood was rotted and soft. Unfortunately, the chainsaw was still running. 28 stitches in my calf. FML
I agree, your life sucks (66617) - you deserved it (9479)
On 05/10/2009 at 8:44am - misc - by Jopes (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I thought it would be funny if I put a 'Free if Hot-Wired' sign on my friend's car. I guess it worked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6132) - you deserved it (59039)
On 05/09/2009 at 12:18am - misc - by t-dawg (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I was walking to class with my roommate. She didn't notice the car coming up behind her because her headphones were in. As I pulled her out of the way, she thought I was goofing around and shoved me back... in front of the car. I got hit and rolled off the hood. FML
I agree, your life sucks (94863) - you deserved it (3728)
On 05/07/2009 at 3:11pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Italy (Toscana)
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I really get off on hearing her say my name so I was imagining her doing so more often than she actually was. I then called out my own name by accident. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22471) - you deserved it (76692)
On 05/07/2009 at 10:45am - intimacy - by eeh (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I stopped at a red light. I noticed the car in front of me had the reverse lights on. I thought to myself "Meh, that person must know. They wouldn't do that." The light turned green. Turns out they didn't. Nor did they have insurance. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42292) - you deserved it (3908)
On 05/06/2009 at 10:26pm - misc - by jezusflowers (man) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I paid $60 for a haircut from a professional stylist, only to walk out looking like Spock from Star Trek. The worst part was the stylist asked me, "Hey, are you going to see that new Star Trek movie?" and tried to talk me into watching it. Now, wherever I go, people are giving me the 'live long and prosper' sign. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46203) - you deserved it (6829)
On 05/05/2009 at 2:21am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, I found a box of birthday candles sitting on the coffee table. Bored, I lit one, and after a minute I threw it away and sat back down on the couch. I started looking at the box and noticed that it said "Magic Re-Lighting Candles" at the exact moment that my trash can burst into flames. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22245) - you deserved it (64564)
On 05/04/2009 at 4:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I sent everyone a text on my phone book saying, "Happy Star Wars Day!!! May the Fourth be with you!!" I forgot to uncheck my exgirlfriend's number. She texted back, "one of the many reasons I broke up with you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21286) - you deserved it (53415)
On 05/04/2009 at 3:04pm - misc - by 1suckatL1fe - United States (Virginia)
Today, a telemarketer called for my dad. Jokingly, I said, "I haven't seen him for like five days...I'm starting to get worried," in my best child-like voice. Apparently the telemarketer called Child Protective Services. I'm 20. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11934) - you deserved it (57065)
On 04/30/2009 at 2:03pm - misc - by Telemistake (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my boyfriend and I were laying naked in my bed making out. All of a sudden, we hear "pop goes the weasel" outside my house. My boyfriend stops and excitedly says, "ICE CREAM MAN", flips me over, grabs his clothes, and runs out of my room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (89521) - you deserved it (14396)
On 04/30/2009 at 8:15am - intimacy - by soooyeah (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my first graders released the butterflies we've been raising. The kids were sad that one had died in his cocoon and wouldn't be set free. Turns out that butterfly may have had a better fate: a flock of birds ate half of the others. Immediately after releasing them. In front of the kids. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57975) - you deserved it (3647)
On 04/29/2009 at 12:30pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Monday 17 June 2013
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