About Ebola : you don't want to know
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You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
Ebola's favorite FMLs
Today, my mom texted me, asking what I'd like her to get for dinner tonight. I texted back "Something exotic if you're up for it :)". Except I accidentally typed "erotic". I only noticed the typo when I checked after getting no reply. She comes home in a couple of hours. Shit, shit, shit. FML
by Anonymous / 10/07/2015 at 10:14pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, the 3 girls who have continuously bullied me for the past 3 years gave a class presentation on why bullying is so terrible. Judging from our teacher's comments, they're going to get top marks. FML
by Anonymous / 10/07/2015 at 9:47pm / United States (New Jersey) / Kids
Today, my roommate confided in me that she hadn't been taking showers while at school because she was afraid of being in the shower when the fire alarm goes off. She goes home once every month, and will only shower there. I have to live with her for the rest of the year. FML
by Utterly_Confused / 10/07/2015 at 6:07pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
Today, I'm staying at my grandparents' house. I went upstairs to grab my sketchbook to show off to my grandma. My grandpa is half-deaf, which I guess explains how he didn't hear me. I heard him though, jerking off and muttering the most disgusting sexual things about "Tara." I'm Tara. FML
by T-Bear / 10/07/2015 at 11:02am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 10/07/2015 at 9:45am / Belgium (Antwerpen) / Work
Today, my mom and I went to catch our flight to Jamaica. She ended up being detained and questioned, because she packed hairspray, shampoo, drinks, basically half the shit you're not allowed to have in your luggage. We missed our flight. FML
by Anonymous / 10/07/2015 at 6:58am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by aishyaslife89 / 10/06/2015 at 6:03pm / United States (Ohio) / Animals
by FacePalmPower / 10/03/2015 at 6:59pm / United States / Animals
by Anonymous / 10/03/2015 at 4:45pm / United States (New Jersey) / Money
by coward / 10/03/2015 at 6:13am / United Kingdom / Love
Today, at the swimming pool, I thought it'd be funny to sneak up on my 5-year-old daughter underwater and surprise her. I grabbed her by the sides, and she shrieked. A moment later, a brown cloud erupted from her swimsuit. Cue screaming and a mass panic from the other kids. FML
by Anonymous / 10/03/2015 at 3:00am / United States (Minnesota) / Kids
by wormiformed / 10/03/2015 at 12:14am / New Zealand / Work
Today, after taking my little niece out onto the balcony of her family's new apartment to enjoy the view, we watched as a man jay-walked across the street down below and was run over by a car. My niece is pretty much traumatized for life now. FML
by scarredforlife / 10/02/2015 at 9:13pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
Today, I took my boyfriend to dinner to meet my parents. He agreed to be on his best behavior, but when my mom told us about some shady stuff going on at her job, he replied that it sounded "fishier than Justin Bieber's cunt." We were quickly kicked out. FML
by FML / 10/02/2015 at 5:45pm / United States (Illinois) / Love
by sad-boing / 10/02/2015 at 5:01pm / United Kingdom (Kent) / Intimacy