About Ebola : you don't want to know
Ebola's FML badges
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
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Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
Ebola's favorite FMLs
Today, a guy for whom I did a design job told me he would only be able to pay me in 3 weeks. I told him that it was OK, as long as I didn't have to follow him around to collect my money. "Don't worry, I know the feeling," he said, "I used to run an illegal business." FML
by Lala / 12/08/2015 at 3:30am / United States (Colorado) / Money
by unemployed-dude / 12/08/2015 at 1:17am / Australia (Victoria) / Work
by Anonymous / 12/07/2015 at 7:40pm / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
by badbitch23 / 12/07/2015 at 6:21pm / United States (Texas) / Love
by accidentalnorman / 12/07/2015 at 5:11am / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 12/06/2015 at 4:58am / United States (North Carolina) / Work
by gmian / 12/06/2015 at 12:06am / United States (Massachusetts) / Work
Today, my dad is having his midlife crisis and bought a mercedes along with a girlfriend less than half his age. I was trying to be supportive until I found out he is funding his midlife crisis with my university loan. FML
by adam / 12/05/2015 at 9:54am / Czech Republic / Money
by not twilight / 12/04/2015 at 7:47pm / United States (North Carolina) / Animals
Today, I found out my son was never accepted into the local university 2 years ago. He actually went out and got a job, and only lied about it so he could keep living in my house rent-free. The conniving bastard makes more than I do at my minimum-wage job. FML
by Suckered / 12/04/2015 at 4:47pm / United States (Florida) / Kids
Today, my friend took me tandem skydiving. When it was time to jump, he began crying, said he'd cut our parachute cords, then said "Goodbye, cruel world!" and pushed me off the plane with him strapped to my back. I pissed myself and cried like a bitch. He thinks his "prank" was hilarious. FML
by Anonymous / 12/04/2015 at 3:36pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I spoke to a highly recommended therapist for my special-needs child. After 45 minutes of describing our challenges, heartbreaks and other very personal information, she told me that her schedule was permanently full. But she invited me to go through the phone book to find someone else. FML
by Hi_Five / 12/03/2015 at 3:48pm / United States (North Carolina) / Kids
Today, I was walking on my crutches towards the bus through the rain. The bus driver looked into my eyes, punching the button to close the doors while I was still a few meters away. As he drove off, he kept his eyes on me, while I had to wait for another 15 minutes for the next bus in the rain. FML
by shaft2112 / 12/03/2015 at 3:19pm / Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen) / Transportation
Today, I was getting my picture taken with my mom and grandma for a portrait. I said it was going to be beautiful when it was done, with three generations of our family in it. My grandma said that would be true, if I weren't adopted. FML
by GraceWaldorf93 / 12/03/2015 at 11:45am / Belize (Belize) / Miscellaneous
Today, I grazed my hand over the bottom of my desk's keyboard tray, and found something sticky. I gagged when I realized it was jizz, and I immediately washed my hands and wiped everything. I then checked my browser history, which was full of porn. Thanks, roomie. FML
by katluvnc / 12/03/2015 at 9:02am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, my energetic 10-month-old decided to stay up four hours past bedtime. After I FINALLY got…