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Ebola

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Ebola
  • Town/Country : Washington DC, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4117
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Ebola : I never know what to write.

26 years old

Undergrad in biochem
Masters in biotechnology

I'm a research scientist

Ebola's last visitors

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Ebola's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at my new boyfriend's house, and he was taking a shower. I had to take a crap real bad, but his apartment only has the one bathroom. I couldn't wait for him to finish, and ended having to shit in a plastic bag. FML

#21044466
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43366) - you deserved it (18810)

On 01/29/2014 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went on a blind date. The first thing the guy did was ask if I knew what it felt like to have spiders crawl out of my vagina. FML

#21044324
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47369) - you deserved it (5031)

On 01/29/2014 at 5:14pm - love - by riiiight (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, it's my 8 year anniversary. My boyfriend's "romantic" gesture for the occasion was to toss a few McDonald's coupons at me and tell me to get whatever I wanted. FML

#21044284
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41100) - you deserved it (6097)

On 01/29/2014 at 4:28pm - love - by CUNTCUNTCUNT (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend, and I really started getting into it. I said, "Hang on tight, this is gonna get intense." She replied, "Doubt it" and yawned. FML

#21044260
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46504) - you deserved it (13885)

On 01/29/2014 at 4:04pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Wrexham)

Today, my boss let me know that I'm being laid off, via a text message that ended in "lmao". FML

#21043231
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44118) - you deserved it (3251)

On 01/28/2014 at 5:36pm - work - by soon to be unemployed (man) - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, I moved back into my dorm. My ex-girlfriend, and the guy she left me for, now cohabit next door. Now I get to hear them screwing while I try to do my homework. FML

#21043113
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46035) - you deserved it (3349)

On 01/28/2014 at 3:28pm - love - by Order of the Dangling Testicles (man) - United States (New York)

Today, at work teaching a cooking class, one of the kids asked if they could use a knife to help me chop vegetables. I said no, because it was very sharp and only staff members are allowed to use them. Just as I said that, the knife sliced through the tip of my thumb. FML

#21042937
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37055) - you deserved it (9739)

On 01/28/2014 at 12:06pm - health - by just the tip, though - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was eating at a Chinese restaurant, when I stopped the waitress to tell her that even though I am of Chinese heritage, I can't understand a word of Chinese. After an awkward silence, she told me she was actually speaking English. FML

#21042741
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37585) - you deserved it (13684)

On 01/28/2014 at 6:16am - misc - by ChickenBallsPlease (woman) - United Kingdom (Norfolk)

Today, I realized that my dog has more work experience than I do. He's a retired military working dog, and I have a Master's degree. FML

#21042693
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37685) - you deserved it (4593)

On 01/28/2014 at 3:22am - animals - by Pooper scooper - Guam

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because she found some lesbian porn on my computer. Her reasoning? That I must secretly be gay. FML

#21042109
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42300) - you deserved it (9169)

On 01/27/2014 at 6:32pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, I got a black eye while trying to break up a fight caused by some complete bastard making a "yo momma" joke at the funeral of my best friend's mother. FML

#21042087
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51230) - you deserved it (3940)

On 01/27/2014 at 6:09pm - health - by knobbed (man) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, I woke up after a night out partying only to find I'd wet the bed. I was so ashamed that I rolled my girlfriend into it to avoid taking the blame. FML

#21042040
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20516) - you deserved it (54280)

On 01/27/2014 at 5:31pm - misc - by :( (man) - Algeria

Today, I got my wedding photos back. The only decent picture of my husband and me together also featured a fat guy in a crop top behind us. FML

#21041939
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41191) - you deserved it (4531)

On 01/27/2014 at 3:55pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was packing, when my parents told me to put my little sister's toothbrush in the top pocket of their suitcase. The pocket I opened had 3 unopened boxes of condoms in it. We're going to my gran's house, and I'm going to be sleeping on a mattress on the floor of their room. FML

#21040204
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45988) - you deserved it (3620)

On 01/26/2014 at 12:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I told my friend I would pay him to ask out the ugliest girl he knew. He asked out my girlfriend. FML

#21039900
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23433) - you deserved it (46233)

On 01/25/2014 at 7:33pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)



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