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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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ERiKiiTAJ0NES

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ERiKiiTAJ0NES
  • Town/Country : Oxford, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 26 October 1991 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 554
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About ERiKiiTAJ0NES : My name is Erica Jane. I'm currently a nursing student at the University of Pittsburgh at Bradford.

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ERiKiiTAJ0NES's favorite FMLs

Today, while in line at a gas station, I felt something on my shoulder. I turned around only to see a woman behind me pulling the sunburnt skin off my shoulder. When I told her to stop, she yelled, hit me with her purse and ran off crying. FML

#17188929 (289)

I agree, your life sucks (34405) - you deserved it (2467)

On 07/20/2011 at 9:38am - misc - by therundown - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was at a club with my friends, when a group of guys approached us. It got quiet for a second, and I heard one of them say, "It's okay, I've got the fat one this time," then walk over and start talking to me. FML

#17145151 (207)

I agree, your life sucks (25141) - you deserved it (5158)

On 07/17/2011 at 2:24am - misc - by grenade (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my six year old son came up to me with his arms spread and said, "I feel like a hug." I got really excited and hopeful because he is very anti-social and hates physical contact. As soon as I stood up to hug him he said "Feeling's gone" and walked away. FML

#17134448 (318)

I agree, your life sucks (30981) - you deserved it (2905)

On 07/16/2011 at 9:28am - kids - by Rejected (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I caught a cab to take me to a hospital appointment. The driver turned around and told me I was in the Cash Cab. I got really excited and screamed. That is, until she laughed and said, "Just kidding. I always wanted to do that to someone." FML

#17128085 (323)

I agree, your life sucks (26198) - you deserved it (5936)

On 07/15/2011 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I met my long distance girlfriend after two years of being separated by 900 miles. She brought her short distance boyfriend to the meeting. FML

#17113605 (184)

I agree, your life sucks (26360) - you deserved it (4860)

On 07/14/2011 at 10:22pm - love - by longtriphome (man) - United States

Today, I woke up to what I thought was my 9 month old son breastfeeding. It was my boyfriend. According to him, he wanted to experience what his mother never gave him as a kid. FML

#15561412 (371)

I agree, your life sucks (31527) - you deserved it (5895)

On 03/30/2011 at 2:26pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I heard the four most dreaded words known to man during my first time: "Is it in yet?" It was. FML

#15546300 (468)

I agree, your life sucks (57469) - you deserved it (7201)

On 03/29/2011 at 1:26pm - intimacy - by Johntheladdo (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was sitting in Walmart and I saw an attractive woman walking by. Being the single guy I am, I went up to her and asked if she needed help with carrying her groceries. She responded with "You know I'm a guy right?" FML

#15493619 (177)

I agree, your life sucks (23582) - you deserved it (11447)

On 03/26/2011 at 2:24am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML

#15472026 (426)

I agree, your life sucks (39354) - you deserved it (6108)

On 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm - misc - by omg - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my cab driver told me about the time he tried to commit suicide by driving off a bridge... while we were crossing a river. FML

#15470057 (245)

I agree, your life sucks (31497) - you deserved it (2327)

On 03/24/2011 at 6:51pm - misc - by phantomdriver - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while at a boring lecture, I heard some people behind me whispering and laughing. I turned around, wondering what was so funny, which made them laugh even more. I then realised it looked like I'd been giving my pen a blowjob for the last 10 minutes. FML

#15386188 (268)

I agree, your life sucks (15080) - you deserved it (21895)

On 03/19/2011 at 5:37pm - intimacy - by gayboii (man) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, at the Mommy and Me dance class that I take my four year old daughter to, the instructor had us do a stretch, telling us to pretend we're mermaids. My daughter said to me, "But you're not a mermaid, you're a whale!" FML

#15385688 (159)

I agree, your life sucks (29572) - you deserved it (5158)

On 03/19/2011 at 5:04pm - kids - by Abby_gummibear (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I discovered that the demonic voice that made me nearly piss myself all night, was my sister's Furby she stuck in the closet. FML

#15219004 (206)

I agree, your life sucks (28549) - you deserved it (5099)

On 03/06/2011 at 2:38pm - misc - by Spooked (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my husband told me I was lucky to have someone who would love me no matter what my vagina smelled like. FML

#15215941 (229)

I agree, your life sucks (32504) - you deserved it (15533)

On 03/06/2011 at 6:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Reserved

Today, my dad got drunk and asked if I had inherited his "abnormally tiny penis." FML

#15209845 (150)

I agree, your life sucks (29383) - you deserved it (2476)

On 03/05/2011 at 8:42pm - health - by nick (man) - United States (Massachusetts)