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Dsnake1's FML badges
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
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Dsnake1's favorite FMLs
by beccav23 / 10/25/2011 at 12:08pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by myownperson / 10/25/2011 at 4:17am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was using the toilet and decided to check out some FMLs. One made me laugh out loud as my room-mate was passing by the bathroom. He now tells everyone my penis is so small it makes even me laugh every time I see it. FML
by Anonymous / 10/06/2011 at 12:17pm / Canada / Intimacy
Today, my girlfriend called me over to her house. When I knocked, no one responded to the door. I decided to check the back yard and found her sunbathing by the pool. I kneeled by her and placed my hand on her butt, kissing her neck. What I heard next, "So this is what you do with my daughter." FML
by Anonymous / 09/15/2011 at 7:54pm / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 09/14/2011 at 12:34pm / United States (Kansas) / Health
Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML
by gir / 07/14/2011 at 3:35pm / United States (Tennessee) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 06/27/2011 at 9:55am / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by ugh / 06/14/2011 at 1:56pm / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous
by Mom / 06/11/2011 at 1:25pm / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy
by Username / 06/05/2011 at 11:29pm / United States / Transportation
by Artic / 04/12/2011 at 12:00am / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by Johntheladdo / 03/29/2011 at 1:26pm / United Kingdom (London) / Intimacy
Today, we had to discuss our heritage at school. When I told the class that I am German, Japanese, and of the Jewish faith, the teacher loudly laughs at the "irony." Something like this happens whenever I tell people my background. FML
by Anonymous / 03/06/2011 at 12:18am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/24/2011 at 5:09pm / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out that the white marks on my pillow aren't from me drooling in my sleep like I originally thought. My roommate used my pillow to help support her lower back during intercourse with her hookup from last night. FML
by KaraAnn17 / 02/12/2011 at 11:29am / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy
- 1Today, after two weeks of trying to convince my parents to go to my high school graduation. They… 2Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 3Today, my flatmate came home from a date with the same guy that I have been in love with since high…
- Today, my family got into a massive argument about whether or not battery-operated toothbrushes are… Today, I tried to have sex with my boyfriend three times, but every time he insisted that he wasn't… Today, the girl I have been dating for the past five years asked me to move to California with her…