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Dsnake1's FML badges
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
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Dsnake1's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 07/05/2013 at 10:26am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
Today, I was explaining to my son that porn isn't a realistic depiction of sex. Just as I finished explaining to him that threesomes rarely happen in real life, he started crying. I feel like a dream-crushing monster. FML
by sorry, kiddo / 06/30/2013 at 5:44pm / Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest) / Kids
by not cool / 06/28/2013 at 1:16am / Australia (Queensland) / Health
Today, another "gentleman" called and asked for my "services". This is happening a lot lately, because apparently I have the old number of a prostitute. I told him I'm not who he's looking for, to which he replied that I sound like a "sexy lady" and that he wanted to have some fun. FML
by Anonymous / 06/26/2013 at 1:05pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my husband finally returned from his 18-month deployment. Sexually starved, we wasted no time getting busy. Later as we finally cooled off, I got a message from my Aunt. She was hiding in our closet the whole time to surprise us with cake for his safe return. FML
by jgtrflynn / 06/24/2013 at 12:37am / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy
Today, I was teasing my 6-year-old sister about having a boyfriend. I asked her, "Did he take his shirt off?" She promptly said no. A few minutes later, she said, "But he did take his pants off." I then asked why. She said, "To show me his penis." FML
by joe / 06/23/2013 at 7:36pm / United States (Maryland) / Kids
by Anonymous / 06/23/2013 at 2:55am / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 06/22/2013 at 2:39am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy
by bleeeaaaaaacccccchhhhhhhh / 06/21/2013 at 5:00pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Intimacy
by whatno / 06/19/2013 at 7:40pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by idontwanttoknow / 06/16/2013 at 7:37am / United States / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 06/15/2013 at 12:28am / Canada (Alberta) / Love
by Anonymous / 06/13/2013 at 8:30pm / United Kingdom (Southampton) / Love
by instinct / 06/11/2013 at 11:06pm / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 06/08/2013 at 4:53pm / United Kingdom (Bromley) / Intimacy