Draxanoth

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Offline (the 03/26/2016 at 5:22am)

Draxanoth

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 13 July 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5098
  • Number of comments : 58
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Draxanoth's page activity

Visits<b>jds14</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 12:27pm<b>kingshelly</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 7:56am<b>weird_adult</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 2:22pm<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 7:12pm<b>JadeOmega</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 4:46pm<b>Plastinate</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 7:35am<b>soveryunoriginal</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 1:03pm<b>missadell</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 5:54pm<b>cecesavannah2015</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 2:16am<b>Devyn333</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 2:28am<b>peceout</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 2:04pm<b>axfabxdisaster</b> - the 05/24/2015 at 3:09pm<b>cummeariver</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 11:01pm<b>miaaxoxxo</b> - the 02/05/2015 at 8:09am<b>howtobestupid</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 10:57am<b>PickledSweets</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 2:11pm<b>eddie367</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 1:50pm<b>TheAtomicBomb</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 9:10pm

Fucked!<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 1:12am

Draxanoth's FML badges

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Who’s the fairest of them all?

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The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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Draxanoth's favorite FMLs

Today, I received a poorly-written letter from my asshole neighbor in which he threatened to "sew" me because my dog shat on his lawn again. I went over, asked if he needed some wool for his sewing, and told him to stop being an idiot. Now he's apparently hiring a lawyer for real. FML

by possibly a sweater / 12/05/2013 at 5:26pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I pulled over a speeding driver. I admit that I'd been hoping for this moment since I joined the police force; the moment a lady put her cleavage on display to get out of a ticket. Sadly, this lady was a senior citizen, and her breasts looked like two semi-deflated balloons. FML

by fuck my eyeballs / 12/01/2013 at 6:07pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, a girl and I were flirting and it was going well. Feeling bold, I asked what she would do if I kissed her. She smiled flirtatiously and said "Why don't you try it and find out?" I went in for a kiss, and she slapped me. FML

by smooth / 11/21/2013 at 11:10am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I watched a little girl laugh while giving bread to some pigeons at a bus stop. A bus then arrived. All the pigeons moved out of the away, except one. Its head got crushed by a wheel, and some blood splattered onto the little girl's shoes, who then screamed. With laughter. FML

by B_and_W / 11/21/2013 at 6:35am / France / Kids

Today, I watched my mother tell a man that the holocaust was "a good thing" and "necessary for population control". That man was my girlfriend's father. Who is Jewish. FML

by Colby / 11/15/2013 at 11:59am / Canada (New Brunswick) / Miscellaneous

Today, she did it again. While I was minding my own business reading the paper, she casually walked up to me and slashed my face with her nails, drawing blood and screams of pain. I need to get out of this abusive relationship, but no one will adopt my asshole of a cat. FML

by Anonymous / 11/08/2013 at 6:02pm / Canada (Alberta) / Animals

Today, my dad asked me to stop calling him "dad" because it’s too weird for his girlfriend’s kids to hear, because they call him dad. FML

by meens42 / 09/30/2013 at 4:04am / United States / Kids

Today, I was asked by my neighbor to stop jogging in our neighborhood because he keeps catching his son whacking off while watching me. His son is 28 years old and still lives at home. I'm 18. FML

by whatjusthappened / 09/05/2013 at 8:46pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I read a seemingly serious article online about giving your smartphone some extra charge by putting it in the microwave for one minute. My phone is now fried. FML

by Anonymous / 09/02/2013 at 4:37pm / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I brought my Japanese girlfriend home for dinner with my family for the first time. They all got drunk and made heaps of racist jokes right in front of us. My dad forgot her name and started calling her "Rice Ball" instead. FML

by Thanks everyone / 08/28/2013 at 6:35pm / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, I asked my boss for a raise, explaining that another shop offered me a job at a higher rate, but I would stay if he would offer me the same. Instead, he fired me then called the other shop and said I was fired for failing a drug test. FML

by nowork / 08/27/2013 at 11:21pm / United States (New York) / Work

Today, at the pool, a kid no older than 8 was sitting on the diving board, not letting anyone else use it. I went over and tried to reason with him, but he wouldn't listen. My uncle stormed over, said "I got this!" and punted him over the edge. We both got thrown out for "bullying" the kid. FML

by JuggaloSlasher15 / 08/08/2013 at 7:03pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, in the middle of examining me, my gynecologist suddenly took a sharp intake of breath and vomited on the floor. FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2013 at 7:10am / Latvia (Jelgavas) / Health

Today, I came home a little earlier than usual, only to walk in on my dad frantically trying to remove a ballgag from my mom's mouth. FML

by NO NO NO / 08/05/2013 at 5:42pm / Netherlands (Zuid-Holland) / Intimacy

Today, while using a restroom in Walmart, an old lady with a cane hobbled in screaming, "I smell someone making sin!" She would not stop tapping on the door with her cane till I came out. FML

by DreamStatic / 07/28/2013 at 10:16pm / United States (Georgia) / Health