Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Drake_The_Dragon

Offline (yesterday at 3:07pm) | Search for a member

Drake_The_Dragon

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 5 September 1946 (67 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 818
  • Number of comments : 98
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About Drake_The_Dragon : That's not my real birthday I just like filling thing out so I put Freddie Mercury's birthday in. Please do not message me if you want to flirt. This is not a dating website! Always remember to- Smile...........
it will either warm their hearts or piss them off, either way you win! :)

Drake_The_Dragon's page activity

Visits<b>MarcoLoco</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 10:47pm<b>Blackhawk706</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 8:07pm<b>Dogfoodlid</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 6:28pm<b>angelk19</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 3:06pm<b>synnefrenia</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 3:32am<b>summer135790</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 2:48pm<b>bleu85</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 12:25pm<b>tompou6</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 11:55pm<b>SaintVeronika</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 12:34am<b>WizardlyUnicorn</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 11:47pm<b>abdiG</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 5:43pm<b>Faithilicious123</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 2:52pm<b>shenzielover</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 7:15am<b>PotatoPal</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 2:34pm<b>JayBooker</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 2:15pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 9:55am<b>KazuTrumpet1512</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 5:55am<b>OrangeDoge25</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 2:20am

Drake_The_Dragon's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of Drake_The_Dragon's badges

Drake_The_Dragon's favorite FMLs

Today, I wore a tank top for the first time in a few years. It turned out even worse than the last time. I got insulted by several people over my "Never say never" upper chest tattoo, which I got years ago, before the words ever became associated with a certain douchy Canadian pop "singer". FML

#21230914
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42077) - you deserved it (9126)

On 08/06/2014 at 12:45pm - misc - by beaverfever (man) - Poland (Zachodniopomorskie)

Today, I was watching my 3 year old brother. He asked me to get him a cookie and I said, "What's the magic word?" He looked at me angrily and said "Bitch, please." FML

#21227114
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43160) - you deserved it (7009)

On 08/01/2014 at 9:57pm - kids - by WickedRene (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend's dad returned home from deployment. Being the grade A fucktard that I am, I got flustered and asked, "So um, did you make it back?" He looked me dead in the eyes and said completely deadpan, "No, obviously I died. Moron." FML

#21226906
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33804) - you deserved it (22471)

On 08/01/2014 at 4:45pm - misc - by whoops (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I accidentally farted in the middle of class. Thinking I got away with it, I just kept doing my work until some kid across the room says, "I could have done better." FML

#21224311
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34349) - you deserved it (5911)

On 07/29/2014 at 11:49pm - work - by dealtit - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had to take a splinter out of my eight year old son's penis. FML

Today, I tried fixing my dad's lawnmower after he said, "Girls can't change a lightbulb right, let alone fix a machine." An hour later, when I had the lawnmower running again, he bitched me out for trying to make him "look stupid." He's been sulking and acting pissy ever since. FML

#21218479
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51752) - you deserved it (4340)

On 07/23/2014 at 4:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was scrubbing the bloody aftermath of a successful mouse trap off of my stove with an old toothbrush. After a few good scrubs, out of habit I put the toothbrush in my mouth while I turned on the water. FML

Today, as I was on the couch taking a nap, it started violently shaking. I panicked and chased my family outside, convinced it was an earthquake. It was just the cat trapped inside the couch. FML

Today, I found out that my cat, that I've had for 3 years, is actually my neighbor's missing cat. FML

#21212155
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47966) - you deserved it (6165)

On 07/17/2014 at 7:32pm - animals - by kittynapper - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went to a market. I saw stall which had mainly animal furs and things like that. I found a rounded, furry pen and stroked my cheek with it. Wondering what it was, being so soft and oddly shaped, I checked the tag. It was kangaroo testicles. FML

#21211381
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36163) - you deserved it (17560)

On 07/16/2014 at 11:31pm - misc - by happypineapple - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I discovered the downside to having a "sneak-attacks-allowed" tickle war with my 4-year-old son. I had to explain to several outraged strangers at the supermarket why my son kept flinching and pulling away whenever I made any sudden movements near him. FML

#21207892
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40489) - you deserved it (5799)

On 07/13/2014 at 12:04pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, while being high for the first time after getting my wisdom teeth pulled, I called my dental assistant pretty before leaving, and then shouted, "I NEED TO POOP!" to the whole office. FML

#21191137
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38819) - you deserved it (7064)

On 06/28/2014 at 2:28am - health - by Madridsta - United States (California)

Today, I heard my son say, "I don't want any bacon with my eggs". Where did I go wrong? FML

#21187679
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51995) - you deserved it (16824)

On 06/25/2014 at 8:30am - kids - by failed dad (man) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, I told someone about my degree in technical theatre with a concentration in lighting design. They looked at me and said, "You're paid $52,000 a year to turn lights on and off?" And technically, that's correct. FML

#21159630
11 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42680) - you deserved it (11185)

On 06/01/2014 at 6:15pm - work - by ugh - United States (New Hampshire)



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: