About Dr_Adorable : I like to read while sitting on a pile of skulls.
Dr_Adorable's FML badges
100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Dr_Adorable's favorite FMLs
Today, I was on my way home on my bike when a lady in a 4WD cut me off while beeping her horn and calling me a "stupid f**ker who should get a proper education." In her car, she was smoking, and her three children weren't wearing seat belts. FML
by faza4327 / 04/06/2011 at 3:43am / Australia (South Australia) / Transportation
Today, Amazon didn't deliver the present I bought my mother for Mothering Sunday, so she called me an 'Ungrateful bastard.' And about half an hour ago, I cut my thumb whilst making her lunch. She said, 'You're doing this on purpose so I feel sorry for you. Well I don't.' FML
by Trainspotting / 04/03/2011 at 9:32am / United Kingdom (Staffordshire) / Miscellaneous
Today, I caught my boyfriend secretly using my hair straightener while I was in the other room. Too embarrassed to talk to him about it, I left and came back later, only to discover him slipping on a pair of my panties. FML
by WTF? / 04/01/2011 at 11:55am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous
Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML
by ouch / 03/28/2011 at 11:33pm / United States (Arizona) / Love
by anonymous / 03/28/2011 at 2:48pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was cooking, and I took a pot of boiling water to the sink to drain. My pot holder slipped, and the boiling water spilled all over my breasts. Second degree boob burns are bad, but losing half a nipple to potato salad is worse. FML
by ouchmytits / 03/28/2011 at 2:42am / United States (Mississippi) / Health
Today, I joked with my dad, saying I'd gotten my boyfriend pregnant. In response, he slapped me, threw my phone across the room, smashed my laptop, and then took a moment for what I'd said to sink in. FML
by rowie1311 / 03/27/2011 at 2:09pm / United Kingdom (Northamptonshire) / Miscellaneous
Today, I learned, 15 years later, that my puppy from when I was 4, was not taken by Santa because he was in need of a reindeer. My parents took him to the shelter because they thought he was ugly. FML
by leeseyxoxo / 03/27/2011 at 2:10am / United States (Florida) / Animals
Today, I was hiking, and four miles away from my car and civilization, I tripped over a rock into a cactus. I used duct tape, which ripped all the hair off my arms and legs but ignored the spikes. FML
by Broderick / 03/26/2011 at 2:32am / United States (Texas) / Health
Today, to make my dorm neighbours think I'm popular, I blasted music and screamed at the top of my lungs so it sounded like I was having a party. My residence manager slapped me with a noise violation, and demanded to come in to make sure we weren't drinking. I had to explain why I was by myself. FML
by freshman / 03/25/2011 at 7:05pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by omg / 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids
Today, I was driving home at night, and got into an accident. Someone had left a toilet in the middle of the road. I hit it. The toilet's fine, but my car now has a toilet-shaped dent in the front. FML
by jballer / 03/22/2011 at 1:10pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Transportation
Today, I am taking a 16 hour flight. Five minutes in, the lady on one side has clipped her toenails onto me and the guy on the other side has the most horrific gas I have ever smelled. To help this problem he bought a cheese plate from the stewardess. 15 hours and 55 minutes to go. FML
by Anonymous / 03/21/2011 at 2:36pm / United States (Georgia) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm / United Kingdom (Wiltshire) / Geek
by Unlovedchild / 03/21/2011 at 11:03am / Miscellaneous