About Dr_Adorable : I like to read while sitting on a pile of skulls.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Today, my fiancé informed me he didn't want a regular wedding cake, he wants a Batman cake. I have nothing against this, except that he already decided the wedding theme would be Star Wars. Essentially, I'm marrying a child. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30103) - you deserved it (16855)
On 05/30/2011 at 12:19am - love - by weddingblues (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because of something I said 2 years ago, as a joke. I guess she took a while to get it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36253) - you deserved it (7003)
On 05/29/2011 at 12:41am - love - by Username - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I saw a hot guy at the laundromat. Wanting an excuse to talk to him, I tossed a pair of my red underwear into his washer. What I didn't realize was that he was washing his whites. Thanks to me, he now has an entire load of pink shirts and boxers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5999) - you deserved it (53782)
On 05/27/2011 at 4:52pm - love - by nicole - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I walked into work looking like I had peed myself, all because my husband thought it would be "hilarious" to slam on the brakes while I was drinking hot coffee. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23865) - you deserved it (2379)
On 05/27/2011 at 11:31am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I was walking home when a stranger came up to me and told me to give him a good reason why he shouldn't punch me in the face. I guess none were good enough. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31453) - you deserved it (2854)
On 05/27/2011 at 10:00am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest)
Today, I witnessed the miracle of life. More specifically, my cat giving birth on my bed at four in the morning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28961) - you deserved it (5464)
On 05/26/2011 at 5:03pm - animals - by KittenTime (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)
Today, I found out my mom intentionally puts extra butter and oil in the food she cooks for me because she wants me to be fatter than her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47238) - you deserved it (3019)
On 05/26/2011 at 10:24am - health - by fatteningmeup (woman) - United States
Today, after eighteen years of living with my adoptive parents, I met my biological mum for the first time. She's a forty year old, 300lb American woman who wears 'Twilight' t-shirts and will be spending the rest of her visit to the UK trying to find Robert Pattinson. She says I remind her of herself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42454) - you deserved it (2875)
On 05/22/2011 at 7:09pm - kids - by Adoptee (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicestershire)
Today, I was pulled over by a cop. He asked for my license and registration so I reached for my center console. I was then greeted with a gun to my ear because my coffee cup supposedly looked like a gun. I stepped out of my car to apologize and I was hit with a big stick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33974) - you deserved it (7650)
On 05/13/2011 at 12:02am - misc - by phant776 (man) - United States (California)
Today, my husband and I were diagnosed with herpes. We've been together for five years and were both virgins before. Even the doctor couldn't give any other explanation. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42352) - you deserved it (5639)
On 04/17/2011 at 10:29am - health - by bumpyroad - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was pretending to be an angry bear while babysitting a 3 year old boy, and an 19 month old girl. I was chasing them around the house having a great time. Just when I bent over to pick up his sister for a diaper change the 3 year old decided it was his turn. He bit me square on the ass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19337) - you deserved it (8304)
On 04/16/2011 at 7:42pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)
Today, my dog decided to fly through the front door like Superman. All 180lbs of her promptly slammed sideways into the wall, putting a dog-sized hole in the plaster. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20401) - you deserved it (2641)
On 04/10/2011 at 3:32pm - animals - by a man - United States (Tennessee)
Today, my dog was barking at a squirrel in the yard. I opened the door to let him chase the squirrel. I went to look at the dead squirrel and found out it was the neighbor's chihuahua. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18514) - you deserved it (31535)
On 04/09/2011 at 8:58pm - animals - by Sid (man) - United States (California)
Today, while making my son lunch, he pooped, took off his diaper, stepped in it, and then climbed to the gate to call for me. When I arrived, he had a big smile on his face and exclaimed, "Look!" Shit footprints were everywhere. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24332) - you deserved it (3379)
On 04/08/2011 at 3:18pm - kids - by heathersmorin - United States (New York)
Today, I was on my way home on my bike when a lady in a 4WD cut me off while beeping her horn and calling me a "stupid f**ker who should get a proper education." In her car, she was smoking, and her three children weren't wearing seat belts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29870) - you deserved it (2394)
On 04/06/2011 at 3:43am - misc - by faza4327 (man) - Australia (South Australia)
Monday 20 May 2013
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