About Dr_Adorable : I like to read while sitting on a pile of skulls.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Today, the couple downstairs decided they wanted to try a home birth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35525) - you deserved it (2860)
On 07/11/2011 at 10:24am - kids - by cocacoola (woman) - Iceland (Eyjafjardarsysla)
Today, I found out that the landscaping job I started three weeks ago is actually for an illicit business run by a hippie who pissed away the entire payroll to fund his drug habit. He has no way of coughing up the $900 he owes me. I'm broke as hell, and my electricity is now going to get cut off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29488) - you deserved it (3054)
On 07/08/2011 at 8:12pm - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I met my boyfriend's sophisticated grandparents. I politely introduced myself. The first words to come out of his granny's mouth were, "If something happens to him, you won't get a f*cking cent of the insurance money, you hear?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28025) - you deserved it (2018)
On 07/07/2011 at 8:58pm - love - by Jessica - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, my friends staged an intervention. I'm not on drugs, I'm not an alcoholic, and I own my own house. My car is paid for and my job pays well. Apparently, I need an intervention because my life is not where they want it to be, which involves me being married with children. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29643) - you deserved it (2351)
On 07/06/2011 at 7:43pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I got stuck listening to my coworker bang on about how sexy her fiancé is for almost an hour. She told me about their sex life, described his dick in great detail, and showed me pictures of him shirtless. My coworker is 49; her fiancé is 56 and overweight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34186) - you deserved it (3048)
On 07/05/2011 at 12:34pm - intimacy - by Jessie (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, my son called me from medical school, asking for a new phone. Why? Because he dropped it in the toilet. How? Trying to videotape his anus while taking a dump. I pay $80,000 a year just to hear he took a dump on his phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33117) - you deserved it (4966)
On 07/03/2011 at 9:50pm - intimacy - by WasteOMoney - United States (Texas)
Today, I was so hungover, I started yelling at inanimate objects. My mom walked in on me calling my cereal a "worthless piece of shit sent from the bowels of Hell." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8407) - you deserved it (38247)
On 07/02/2011 at 4:54pm - misc - by Cowgirl_Up37 (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I tried to comfort my daughter who'd been crying non-stop for hours. She thinks Chuck Norris is coming to kill her, and I can't convince her otherwise. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29394) - you deserved it (3707)
On 07/01/2011 at 1:42pm - kids - by parenting sucks - United States (New York)
Today, after weeks, I've finally reached my goal and lost 10 lbs. My sister got jealous about me losing weight, and told my parents and coworkers that I'm anorexic. Hello, intervention. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27399) - you deserved it (1937)
On 07/01/2011 at 1:56am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I saw a pink, slimy thing coming out of my dog's knob. I got really freaked out so I took him to the vet, only to find out that it was his penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7044) - you deserved it (42731)
On 06/30/2011 at 7:08pm - health - by budbunny13 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I actually resorted to checking the newspaper obituaries to see where the deceased were employed, just so I can find a job opening. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28989) - you deserved it (3530)
On 06/30/2011 at 1:44pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)
Today, I had the most exciting dream of my life. I was dreaming about catching a shiny charmander. I'm 15, and instead of dreaming of girls, I'm dreaming of Pokémon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24450) - you deserved it (12480)
On 06/29/2011 at 1:47pm - misc - by wispywee - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I had to dig up my twin boys birth certificates for baseball registration. Turns out I had been calling both of them by the other twin's name for eight and a half years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14084) - you deserved it (46337)
On 06/25/2011 at 9:39am - kids - by beekeke45 - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, my mom got drunk and told me to leave the house because "I've been mooching off her for too long". I'm 14 and now am sleeping at my friends house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36451) - you deserved it (1918)
Today, I was working the drive-thru at McDonalds, and as I handed out a Diet coke to the customer, the man started growling and yelled "HULK SMASH!" He smashed the cup with two fists and drove off. I was drenched in soda. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29467) - you deserved it (3453)
On 06/24/2011 at 12:46am - work - by Sam (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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