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Dougie_Bee

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Dougie_Bee

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1532
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Dougie_Bee's page activity

Visits<b>OysterPearls</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 11:31pm<b>sh07</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 12:23pm<b>hemonnne</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 3:12pm<b>eddyinfinity</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 2:12am<b>Purrrvana</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 3:58pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 1:05pm<b>peanuty001</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 7:36pm<b>crazyjasmine24</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 12:50pm<b>foxwasalamb</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 5:28am<b>BossMindedFemale</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 3:04am<b>gjikvtj</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 2:14am<b>Theseattlerain</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 11:15pm<b>OneForYourMoney</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 1:47pm<b>lil_miss_simran</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 8:35pm<b>mea_iloveskiing</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 4:10pm<b>Anonie248</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 10:12am<b>Cherryta</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 9:51am<b>PerSueTwo513</b> - the 05/08/2014 at 9:02pm

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Dougie_Bee's favorite FMLs

Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. All I can remember is crying to my mom because I thought spoons were taking over the world. FML

Today, my sister felt guilty and told me about the changes she secretly made to my résumé months ago. She'd put "doing your mom" and "corporate espionage" as my hobbies, and "Justin Bieber's pussy waxer" as a previous job. No wonder I'm still unemployed. FML

#21244565
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36322) - you deserved it (6856)

On 08/24/2014 at 5:50pm - work - by fuck you, tasha (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my girlfriend sent me a bunch of sexy pics and said to come over to her place. I thought she was in the mood for sex. Nope, she just wanted me to come over and hang a shelf, after which she sent me back home. FML

#21244207
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35862) - you deserved it (5459)

On 08/24/2014 at 1:51am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, a guy took me out on a date. His imaginary friends joined us. FML

#21244154
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35645) - you deserved it (2937)

On 08/24/2014 at 12:14am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to a baseball game with my girlfriend's dad. I got a boner when they sang the anthem, because that's what I sing in my head when having sex with his daughter so I last longer. FML

#21240482
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40915) - you deserved it (15111)

On 08/18/2014 at 12:39pm - intimacy - by embarrassed - United States (New York)

Today, I had a seizure while at the airport, ready to go on vacation with my family. We ended up missing our flight. My mom spent most of the ride home making cracks about how I'm always ruining things with my "dramatics". Sorry that I have epilepsy, mom. FML

#21232741
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47090) - you deserved it (2849)

On 08/08/2014 at 7:25pm - health - by Anonymous - Sweden (Vasternorrlands Lan)

Today, I woke up because of a weird noise. Scared, I turned on my bedside lamp. I saw my older, 17-year-old brother peeing in my bedroom doorway. He was hoping I'd step in it in the morning. FML

#21231132
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37557) - you deserved it (2584)

On 08/06/2014 at 6:18pm - kids - by whymyroomthough (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that if you wake your 7-year old sister up by plugging her nose, you'll wake up the next morning, taped down and unable to move as she pours ice water on you. FML

#21230047
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24396) - you deserved it (51039)

On 08/05/2014 at 12:51pm - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was shopping when I suddenly slipped on the wet floor and my basket and my groceries were flung everywhere. Moments later, one of the cleaners walked over holding a "wet floor" sign, saw me and laughed. FML

#21229760
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39720) - you deserved it (3083)

On 08/05/2014 at 12:52am - misc - by ms98 - Australia (South Australia)

Today, due to a hammer-related incident, instead of receiving glass ornaments as gifts from my trip to Venice, my friends will be receiving novelty postcards of Michelangelo's David's penis. FML

Today, my girlfriend's dad returned home from deployment. Being the grade A fucktard that I am, I got flustered and asked, "So um, did you make it back?" He looked me dead in the eyes and said completely deadpan, "No, obviously I died. Moron." FML

#21226906
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33776) - you deserved it (22455)

On 08/01/2014 at 4:45pm - misc - by whoops (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my son said his first word. Unfortunately, that word was "cock." I've tried convincing myself that he's trying to say "clock" but I just can't do it. FML

#21225778
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38586) - you deserved it (6693)

On 07/31/2014 at 12:24pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, while wandering around the big city I just relocated to, I asked a seemingly pleasant-looking lady where the nearest library was. She told me to get lost, and started laughing. Then said she was just joking and gave me directions. I'm now standing in front of a gay strip joint. FML

#21225641
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42435) - you deserved it (4361)

On 07/31/2014 at 7:38am - misc - by lostintdot (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I accidentally farted in the middle of class. Thinking I got away with it, I just kept doing my work until some kid across the room says, "I could have done better." FML

#21224311
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34336) - you deserved it (5909)

On 07/29/2014 at 11:49pm - work - by dealtit - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had a 5 hour exam. The exam guard had clearly eaten something funky, because she kept burping loudly. When I thought it couldn't get any worse, she started farting. FML



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