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Dopehead666

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Dopehead666
  • Town/Country : B.A., United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 April 1992 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 15131
  • Number of comments : 84
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Dopehead666 : Kristina Dopeify.

Reality is a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs.
Lily Tomlin (1939 - )

One of the things you learn from years of dealing with drug people, is that you can turn your back on a person, but never turn your back on a drug. Especially when it's waving a razor-sharp hunting knife in your eye.
(Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas)

Kristina Dopeify - facebook
Dopehead666 - FML & PS3

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Dopehead666's FML badges

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Dopehead666's favorite FMLs

Today, my parents told me that they've been having a contest to see who could punish me the most this week. So far, my mom is in the lead by kicking me out of the car near railroad tracks, and making me walk the 4 miles home in the freezing rain. FML

#18145406
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36938) - you deserved it (2711)

On 11/03/2011 at 5:18am - misc - by Grounded (woman) - United States

Today, it's my first Halloween in America since moving from Russia. While handing candy to children, my roommate told me to compliment a little girl by saying "You have a face only a parent could love". I found out it isn't a compliment when I was punched by her Dad. FML

#18123413
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31441) - you deserved it (4543)

On 10/31/2011 at 8:18pm - kids - by VladyBoi (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out my girlfriend doesn't go to work, she's actually been seeing another guy purely for sex, and each time he gives her money to "support her unemployment." Pretty sure that means I'm dating a prostitute. FML

#18037995
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43358) - you deserved it (2902)

On 10/21/2011 at 10:55am - intimacy - by prostitutes boyfriend - United Kingdom (Cornwall)

Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML

#18022495
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46820) - you deserved it (14937)

On 10/19/2011 at 10:37am - intimacy - by lolilovemyboyfriend (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML

#17663371
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27783) - you deserved it (3794)

On 09/04/2011 at 6:10pm - misc - by ironic driver - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up at my girlfriend's house. She was staring at me, holding a knife over my face. She ran away, giggling. FML

#17457057
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37431) - you deserved it (4053)

On 08/13/2011 at 2:37am - love - by bTOhno - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my father spent half an hour trying to convert my cat to Christianity. He has already done this with my other two cats. He's completely serious and thinks they are born-again Christians. FML

#17072330
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27743) - you deserved it (2605)

On 07/11/2011 at 10:15pm - animals - by CatOwner (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend tried to tell me that he was worried our child might not be mine because he was cheating on me when I got pregnant. FML

#16912974
441 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59487) - you deserved it (6228)

On 06/29/2011 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I saw a woman run down my street screaming, "Fuck you cops! I can drive under the influence if I want to!" It took me a second to realize it was my mother. FML

#16474078
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40116) - you deserved it (2869)

On 06/02/2011 at 9:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had to give a reference for a former employee. I tried to say he was always willing to give us a hand on the job. Instead, I said he was always willing to give us hand-jobs. FML

#16448858
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13235) - you deserved it (20299)

On 06/01/2011 at 8:35am - intimacy - by Username - Canada

Today, I saw my dad chugging a beer in the garage. Why is that so bad? He was hosting an AA meeting in the basement. FML

#16150933
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24279) - you deserved it (1851)

On 05/12/2011 at 10:19pm - health - by Eric -

Today, the only person who wished me a happy birthday is the policeman who checked my identity card for being "suspiciously gangster-like". FML

#15976359
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28630) - you deserved it (4035)

On 04/29/2011 at 10:00am - misc - by Jims (man) - Singapore

Today, I was answering a text from one of my students asking me if they could re-take a test. I thought I'd texted back "No, you can't." Auto correct had used a more frequently used word: "No, you cunt." FML

#15184059
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35988) - you deserved it (22606)

On 03/03/2011 at 6:22am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my mom and I were escorted out of the KFC because my mom tried to mug and pick a fight with another customer. FML

#14854535
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27330) - you deserved it (3408)

On 02/05/2011 at 4:28pm - misc - by lifesux - South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal)

Today, I had a major falling out with my best friend. Angry, I sent a short text message to him explaining how I felt. I soon noticed I'd accidentally texted "I'm going to fucking kill you, asshole." to my boss instead. I'm still waiting on a reply. FML

#14415862
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8096) - you deserved it (33220)

On 12/31/2010 at 11:05pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)



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