Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Dopehead666

Offline (yesterday at 11:07am) | Search for a member

Dopehead666

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 2 April 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 15635
  • Number of comments : 84
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Dopehead666 : Kristina Dopeify.

Reality is a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs.
Lily Tomlin (1939 - )

One of the things you learn from years of dealing with drug people, is that you can turn your back on a person, but never turn your back on a drug. Especially when it's waving a razor-sharp hunting knife in your eye.
(Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas)

Kristina Dopeify - facebook
Dopehead666 - FML & PS3

Dopehead666's page activity

Visits<b>Queen_Bitch69</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 9:49pm<b>gs12345_</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 7:04am<b>swagmaster696969</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 10:46pm<b>JJ_V3N0M</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 12:56am<b>RoVeR_2000</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 4:52pm<b>theflyingellis</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 6:39pm<b>VivaLaColdplay</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 1:17am<b>aidz1994</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 1:28pm<b>xseasonx</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 1:32am<b>winter_under_ice</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 1:33pm<b>lmtaube77</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 12:39am<b>siyafa</b> - the 03/23/2014 at 12:39pm<b>DemolitionLovers</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 7:02pm<b>euphoriagorillaz</b> - the 02/03/2014 at 9:21pm<b>Furby94</b> - the 01/24/2014 at 4:19pm<b>supergoldfish87</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 4:10pm<b>lingo171</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 9:55am<b>Mathgeekboo</b> - the 12/28/2013 at 2:46am

Dopehead666's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

See all of Dopehead666's badges

Dopehead666's favorite FMLs

Today, at work, a crazy customer forced me to promise to take a holiday greeting picture of my cat and myself for her. She says she'll be back and expects one. FML

#21300741
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26301) - you deserved it (2928)

On 11/17/2014 at 1:48pm - animals - by not crazy enough (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got high for the first time. Apparently I called my vet and told him my goldfish was barking. I found out when he called me back later to make sure we were both okay. FML

#21258033
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31653) - you deserved it (18218)

On 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm - animals - by Anonymous - Ghana (Greater Accra)

Today, I learned that while other people drunk call their exes, I drunk adopt cats. Seven cats, to be exact. FML

#21248352
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40932) - you deserved it (9492)

On 08/30/2014 at 7:56am - animals - by cat lady (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, while driving, I saw a dog run across the road. Feeling sorry for the pup on a cold, rainy night, I pulled my car over to pick it up. Once in, it started freaking out so I turned on the light. It was then that I realized I'd just put a wild coyote on my passenger seat. FML

Today, and every other night since my new neighbors moved in two weeks ago, their cat has been standing outside my house meowing constantly up at my window, where my cat keeps standing and meowing back. It's like a feline version of Romeo and Juliet, and I can't sleep. FML

#21024543
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45781) - you deserved it (4926)

On 01/11/2014 at 1:52pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Dominican Republic (Distrito Nacional)

Today, a man started a deep conversation with me at the bus stop about life, death, and the miracles of things we take for granted every day. I was really enjoying it until he looked at his watch and said, "Oh shit, mushrooms make me lose track of time!" and ran off into the night. FML

#20998821
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39519) - you deserved it (4434)

On 12/20/2013 at 3:45am - misc - by whatjusthappened (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my husband was getting undressed. I told my 2-year-old daughter not to go in our bedroom because he was undressing in there. I turned my back and she instantly ran off to my bedroom. I heard her shout "I can see daddy's tail!" Now, she points to everyone's crotch and shouts "TAIL!" FML

#20943580
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49800) - you deserved it (6392)

On 11/03/2013 at 9:22am - kids - by KittyKat (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, I was home alone and heard the kitchen tap turn on. Shocked, I turned it off. It continuously kept turning itself on so I set my video phone on it to find out the cause. My cat has learnt to turn it on. I later found said cat teaching another. I have three cats. All my taps are like this. FML

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

#20705129
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30813) - you deserved it (65613)

On 06/04/2013 at 8:15am - misc - by tinypenis - United States (New York)

Today, while feeding my neighbour's cats, I mistakenly switched up their foods. One has medicated food that causes drowsiness. The healthy cat got knocked out like a log. I panicked, laid him out by the bed, and spilled milk around his head to make it look "natural." I think I'm going to hell. FML

#20697165
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30421) - you deserved it (33407)

On 05/31/2013 at 10:59am - animals - by fuckshitcockwaffle (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my uncle drove to my house in his tractor, beer in one hand, and a radio strapped to the dash blasting country music at unimaginable volume. Neither of us live on a farm. Half the neighborhood stood angrily glaring at us until we went inside. FML

#20684256
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38238) - you deserved it (4172)

On 05/24/2013 at 6:48pm - misc - by unwilling redneck - United States

Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML

#20640901
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50126) - you deserved it (7077)

On 05/04/2013 at 1:05pm - misc - by emasculated 10000% (man) - Sweden (Kronobergs Lan)

Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML

#20587443
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60631) - you deserved it (20251)

On 04/13/2013 at 1:04am - misc - by ironies a b*tch - United States (Illinois)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: