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DontClickOnMe

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DontClickOnMe

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DontClickOnMeDontClickOnMe
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6946
  • Number of comments : 291
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About DontClickOnMe : You clicked on me. Oh my my my, are you gonna regret that. I guess your curiosity was just too much to handle, huh?

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DontClickOnMe's FML badges

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Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

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DontClickOnMe's favorite FMLs

Today, I went on a plane and was sitting next to a mom with her 12-year old daughter. Apparently, they decided to have "the talk." On the plane, right next to me. I heard everything, and actually learned new things. I'm 35. FML

#4691287
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33246) - you deserved it (5862)

On 08/20/2009 at 8:20pm - misc - by airplanes-suck (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while I was walking downtown a homeless person asked me for a dollar. I thought it would be funny to wave the dollar in his face and taunt him. I guess he thought it would be funny to stab me in the leg with a pencil. FML

#4331370
818 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26215) - you deserved it (509415)

On 08/06/2009 at 9:35am - misc - by who_could_it_be - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was working my shift at a fancy restaurant and it had been a really hard day. My parents came in to have dinner and surprise me. After paying, they left a note saying they would see me at home. It also said "By the way, no tip, because you stink at serving." FML

#4231634
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41359) - you deserved it (6484)

On 08/02/2009 at 3:12pm - work - by waiterrrrrrrrr (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I went swimming with this guy I like at dammed river. While we were jumping off the dam, I decided to try to impress him by doing a front flip. I didn't jump far enough off, so when I went to flip, my face skidded down the concrete wall. FML

#3486343
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30541) - you deserved it (39854)

On 07/04/2009 at 6:46pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. Driving her home, we got stuck in a construction zone. I waited half an hour with with my ex-girlfriend bawling her eyes out in the passenger seat as I watched the traffic lady eat her lunch. FML

#3228373
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16207) - you deserved it (60032)

On 06/26/2009 at 1:31am - love - by f03_f0r_l1f3 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my husband and I were getting it on when we heard a little giggle. I put on my robe and looked outside my room to find that no one was there. So we continued. I later called my seven year old son and out he came crawling from under the bed. FML

#3127990
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47070) - you deserved it (10219)

On 06/22/2009 at 7:41pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, a little girl came up to me and said "Hi, my name is Lindsey, lets be friends!". I thought she was cute so I played along and said "Okay! My name is Jen!" Her Reply: "Wait, nevermind, I don't want to be friends anymore. You smell funny." FML

#2002110
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47063) - you deserved it (12147)

On 05/17/2009 at 12:33am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got pulled over while dancing to crazy techno beats in the car. The officer RAN out of his car and up to mine and pounded on my window. He thought I was having a seizure. FML

#1292437
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45884) - you deserved it (21261)

On 04/24/2009 at 4:10pm - misc - by bdutton (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, on the train, I got excited when I suddenly noticed I had a missed call and voicemail from a boy I liked. With a grin on my face, I told my friend. My dad overheard and said, "oh sweetie, he probably had the wrong number." The voicemail was blank. I texted him. The call was an accident. FML

#878620
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50990) - you deserved it (4009)

On 04/08/2009 at 10:35pm - misc - by lyssanthamum - United States (New York)

Today, I accidentally dropped my phone in the toilet. I automatically dove my hand in and ran out of the stall with it. As I dried it, some girls were laughing. I assumed that they were laughing because my phone fell in the toilet. Then I noticed my pants were still down. FML

#790752
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18860) - you deserved it (38475)

On 04/03/2009 at 9:42pm - misc - by tmac (woman) - United States

Today, I was masturbating in my room when my dog started to bark obnoxiously. He does this all the time so I ignored it and kept going. This went on for about a half hour. When I went downstairs, I found an open door and an empty TV stand. FML

#691341
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19711) - you deserved it (88404)

On 03/29/2009 at 10:08pm - animals - by trainE - United States (Michigan)

Today, my friend and i thought it would be funny if we could both fit into her big sweatpants. When we tried to take a step, she fell on top of me. She started peeing uncontrollably. We had to cut ourselves out of the sweatpants. FML

#508489
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50106) - you deserved it (34389)

On 03/21/2009 at 12:11pm - misc - by emilyxoxoxo - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my parents were taking a tour of my apartment when my bird started making noises. It was mimicking my moans from when I was having sex yesterday. It was screaming in my voice, very noticeably. FML

#350139
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72882) - you deserved it (27267)

On 03/15/2009 at 6:45pm - intimacy - by Moanie (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I asked my parents if the outfit I was wearing made me look fat. My mom looked at me and paused for a while; my dad said, "Honey, that outfit doesn't make you look fat. Your fat makes you look fat." FML

#284763
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63472) - you deserved it (21389)

On 03/12/2009 at 3:49pm - health - by mugs (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was talking to my mom. During the conversation she asked me, "Does he take his leg off when you guys are having sex?" Referring to the guy I've been seeing who has a prosthetic leg. My dad then asked, "Does he beat you with it too if you've been naughty?" FML

#209116
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (236433) - you deserved it (31146)

On 03/04/2009 at 6:07pm - intimacy - by Girl123999 (woman) - United States (California)



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