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DoctorWatson

Offline (the 01/26/2015 at 8:49pm) | Search for a member

DoctorWatson

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  • Number of visits : 1430
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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DoctorWatson's page activity

Visits<b>Blaisey</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 6:46am<b>aliceanon</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 9:49pm<b>vividpictures</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 6:54am<b>rambleramble3</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 1:07pm<b>JUICEBOX_Warrior</b> - the 01/18/2014 at 6:47pm<b>saocrates</b> - the 12/29/2013 at 12:56am

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50 favourites

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DoctorWatson's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I got into an argument; however, his new-found passion for hardcore rapping meant that he tried to "diss" me using bad rhymes and ill thought-out putdowns. It was ridiculous, and didn't really make any sense, so I started giggling. He stormed off, grumbling. FML

#20089229
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19103) - you deserved it (2385)

On 09/26/2012 at 5:06am - love - by Popscene (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by rapping in a voicemail. FML

#20053776
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26955) - you deserved it (3146)

On 09/02/2012 at 8:44am - love - by rotezora (woman) - Switzerland (Basel-Stadt)

Today, I was watching some pretty intense porn on my Macbook. I unplugged the second monitor so I could lie on my bed. Instead of defaulting to the screen, Airplay somehow synced it to the living room TV, where the rest of my family was watching a movie. FML

#20052962
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19380) - you deserved it (47110)

On 09/01/2012 at 7:14pm - intimacy - by WhyAppleWhy (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend used various infomercial phrases like, "Wait, there's more!" during sex. FML

#20019911
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28577) - you deserved it (4402)

On 08/14/2012 at 1:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I was on the bus when I felt a big yawn coming on, one so big that my mouth stretched and my eyes closed. It was at this point that the strange man beside me decided to lean over at lightning speed and put his tongue in my mouth. Technically it was my first kiss. I'm 21 years old. FML

#20014909
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41842) - you deserved it (4802)

On 08/11/2012 at 6:33am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I posted a Facebook status on how I hated the new Batman movie. I'm now single, and have received multiple threats. FML

#20009878
345 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17914) - you deserved it (41011)

On 08/08/2012 at 4:39pm - misc - by Deaththreat101 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I surprisingly found two empty seats on the subway. Before anyone could get to them, I rushed and triumphantly sat down, enjoying my victory, until I noticed why they were empty. I had just sat down next to a guy vigorously trying to fellate himself. FML

#20007431
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21720) - you deserved it (5741)

On 08/07/2012 at 9:19am - intimacy - by Nightmares - United States

Today, everyone found out about the strange but intense fetish I have for women physically lifting me. It all came out when my friend, a female bodybuilder, decided to grab and pick me up for a laugh. I came in my pants, in front of about twenty people. FML

#19983416
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38408) - you deserved it (8195)

On 07/25/2012 at 12:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was in line at the pharmacy when the man in front of me asked if I wanted to see a picture of a turd that looked like an uncircumcised penis. Before I had time to answer, he showed me a picture of a turd that looked like an uncircumcised penis. FML

#19981127
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25200) - you deserved it (2016)

On 07/24/2012 at 5:51am - misc - by Uncircumcised Penis - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I told a patient that we needed to collect a stool sample. I left the room momentarily to retrieve what the patient would need. He apparently didn't need anything besides the counter in the exam room. FML

#19951695
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20531) - you deserved it (1919)

On 07/17/2012 at 8:54pm - work - by TimeForACareerChange (man) - United States

Today, my dad was making coffee for the family. Half-way through, he excused himself to the bathroom, so for a laugh, I discreetly poured a load of salt into his drink. When he served us, I drank a mouthful and doubled over hacking. My dad barked, "I wasn't born yesterday, son." FML

#19937636
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5430) - you deserved it (47677)

On 07/14/2012 at 4:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Nigeria (Lagos)

Today, it was my birthday. When my crush spotted me in the hallway and wished me a Happy Birthday, my nerves got the best of me and I blurted, "You too". FML

#19795247
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26037) - you deserved it (4666)

On 06/16/2012 at 12:58am - love - by thefailwhale (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

#19793582
404 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37367) - you deserved it (4017)

On 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm - misc - by 16590 (man) - Sweden

Today, I woke up to the sight of my boyfriend playing a game on my iPhone with his penis. FML

#19781755
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30753) - you deserved it (4635)

On 06/13/2012 at 12:07pm - intimacy - by Rosie (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, after having sex with my girlfriend, I jokingly held the condom above my mouth. Somehow, the condom busted, and everything went over my face. Worse still, we're now wondering just how safe this condom really was. FML

#19743887
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14614) - you deserved it (38353)

On 06/06/2012 at 12:02pm - intimacy - by Rob (man) - United States (Illinois)



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