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DoNotEnter

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2351
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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DoNotEnter's page activity

Visits<b>GenericUsername1</b> - the 11/06/2016 at 10:31am<b>heylookitstimmy</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 10:25pm<b>28actress</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 1:16am<b>HPCullen251</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 10:04am<b>paskievitchjack</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 3:19am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 7:10am<b>varutha</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 7:22am<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 8:22pm<b>Honeydip804</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 2:37am<b>vanessa_tranz</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 1:48pm<b>jeffreywintet</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 8:50am<b>neonvortex</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 4:22pm<b>Ohthatsnasty</b> - the 09/06/2013 at 11:05pm<b>Lolthatsuxbroski</b> - the 07/26/2013 at 12:19pm<b>jamjam12</b> - the 07/16/2013 at 1:36am<b>brankais315</b> - the 12/31/2012 at 12:16am<b>djcampbell18</b> - the 12/27/2012 at 3:06am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 1:10pm

DoNotEnter's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of DoNotEnter's badges

DoNotEnter's favorite FMLs

Today, not wanting to be known as a lightweight anymore, I started drinking with some guy friends. After one beer I ended up in bed with one of them who kindly put my bra back on for me after, as I was too sloshed. I'm no longer known as lightweight, but instead, the slutty drunk. FML

by Permafucked / 05/12/2009 at 10:23am / United States (South Dakota) / Love

Today, I was serving a family at the restaurant where I work. When I went to ask the little girl what she wanted, I was tongue-tied and got "cutie" and "hun" mixed up and ended up asking, "What can I get for you, cuntie?" FML

by keeks_25 / 05/08/2009 at 4:53pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I was working as a manager of the local movie theater. This six year old came in with no parents or anyone else. When I asked him where his parents were he looked at me and said, "Shut up white boy, I don't have to listen to your shit." I just got told by a six year old. FML

by brad3720 / 04/13/2009 at 8:44pm / United States (Illinois) / Work

Today, I was with a group of friends at a bar, and we were all talking about whether we were moaners, screamers, or quiet during sex. My boyfriend said that he was a moaner, which I contradicted. Completely straightfaced, he said, "Well, I am when it's good." FML

by AGluckily / 03/21/2009 at 9:16pm / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy

Today, I got a text message. My phone was sitting on the edge of the bed and set on vibrate, so it fell off. I reached down to grab my phone and fell off the bed. My macbook landed on top of me. I fractured my arm and broke my laptop to read a text from facebook. FML

by Noname / 03/12/2009 at 5:06am / United States (Texas) / Geek

Today, I was sitting in Science class and to my surprise I felt my pants suddenly becoming warm and wet. I looked behind me to see that 4 boys from my class had inserted a small funnel into my exposed buttcrack and where pouring the melted butter from the experiment into that area. FML

by Sarah / 03/10/2009 at 1:13pm / United Kingdom (Bolton) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was told that my mom and her new husband have named my new born brother "Titan". FML

by isthisajoke / 01/14/2009 at 10:49pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous