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About Dnalian1 : Teenage Football Player
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was pretending to be a monkey for a "documentary". The branch snapped and I fell out of the tree and onto a car roof. It was after school, I fell onto the dean's BMW. The video was on facebook before I regained consciousness. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21104) - you deserved it (7218)
On 10/09/2009 at 10:04am - misc - by jane (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, my boyfriend asked me out to dinner, which we never do. While at the restaurant he gets down on his knees, looks me in the eyes, and pulls out a little box. He opens it and inside is a note that says 'We're Done.' He then leaves me at the restaurant with the bill and the $2.00 box. FML
I agree, your life sucks (60679) - you deserved it (3856)
On 10/08/2009 at 3:04pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I fainted on the sidewalk. When I woke up, I was still lying on the sidewalk, people were stepping over me and my purse was gone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47233) - you deserved it (2298)
On 10/06/2009 at 1:25am - misc - by blackedout (woman) - Singapore
Today, my college roomate and I received our first pieces of mail. We were very excited because our mailbox wasn't empty anymore. She got a package of home baked cookies in the mail from her family. I got a letter from a stranger in prison. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27898) - you deserved it (2313)
On 10/06/2009 at 12:32am - misc - by mahlee (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I was really, REALLY tired at work. I went to the restroom to take a little break, and must have dozed off, because I was awoken by my boss, knocking on the door of the stall. Apparently, I had been snoring. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7512) - you deserved it (239)
On 10/05/2009 at 12:36pm - work - by sleepytime (woman) - United States (Nebraska)
Today, I woke up (after a night of drinking) in my backyard. All I was wearing were my boxers and one sock. I staggered up to see my car halfway through my garage wall with a note saying "Sorry Dude". FML
I agree, your life sucks (8512) - you deserved it (26679)
On 10/05/2009 at 1:11am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was walking to my friends Halloween themed birthday party in my zombie costume. Apparently, my crazy coke addicted neighbor found the costume too realistic. He tackled me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30141) - you deserved it (2412)
On 10/03/2009 at 11:34am - health - by Pwnedofthedead (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I told my daughter how her eyes look exactly as pretty as my wife's. She told me that she loved the way my eyeballs stick out of my face, just like Elmo. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28172) - you deserved it (2964)
On 10/03/2009 at 8:33am - kids - by dessaye (man) - Singapore
Today, my english teacher asked me why I didn't have my project completed. Thinking quick on my feet I told her it was because my grandmother had just passed away. Apparently they go to the same country club and have known each other for years. My teacher started crying and ran out of the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5346) - you deserved it (46845)
On 10/02/2009 at 5:07pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I went to the doctor to try and get answers about the numbness and tingling in my right leg. The Dr told me I was too fat for my pants, and I pinched a nerve. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8919) - you deserved it (24829)
On 10/02/2009 at 2:16pm - misc - by apowell5 - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I sat to the right of a girl I really like. I passed her a note asking her to homecoming. She read it, then hurriedly passed it to a hideous girl sitting on her left, who said yes, then hugged me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26605) - you deserved it (7556)
On 10/02/2009 at 1:34am - misc - by asshole (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, while cleaning up, I dropped a box of thumbtacks, spilling them all over the floor. As I fumbled to pick them up, the power went out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35609) - you deserved it (2329)
On 10/01/2009 at 6:31pm - misc - by Ouchies (woman) - United States (Florida) - moderated by Kevin Nealon
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend with the cliché of the diamond ring in a champagne glass. Apparently there was an off-duty police officer across the room watching me slip the ring into the glass. He thought I was slipping in a date-rape drug and tackled me down before I could propose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39014) - you deserved it (2590)
On 09/26/2009 at 10:18pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, I went online to check my credit report. My credit report says that I am deceased, and have no rating. I'm at least 90% sure that this is not true. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29090) - you deserved it (1384)
On 09/22/2009 at 8:27pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I realized that my alcoholism has gotten so bad that I rotate liquor stores so the clerks don't think bad about me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10204) - you deserved it (34599)
On 09/22/2009 at 12:37am - health - by Cpt_Concerned (man) - Canada (Alberta)
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