About DistanceRunner94 : I like to run.
DistanceRunner94's FML badges
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
DistanceRunner94's favorite FMLs
by Out of Ice Cream / 09/29/2015 at 1:06pm / United States / Love
Today, I had to stand up on a train for my 4-hour journey. Why? Two pregnant women flew into unbridled rage with me over sitting in the priority seating, saying I was selfish. I'm recovering from spinal surgery. FML
by hunchbackofnotredamn / 09/29/2015 at 4:33am / United Kingdom (Warwickshire) / Transportation
Today, I found out that after three years of telling my boss our strategy wasn't going to work, that I was right - it didn't work. I also found out that because it didn't work, I lost my job. My boss still has his. FML
by Unemployed / 09/17/2015 at 3:14am / Work
Today, I made it onto my boss's shit-list, after pointing out that he'd misspelled "customer" as "costumer" 6 times in his report, and "college education" as "collage education" twice. It'd be a dick move on his part even if making corrections like this weren't part of my damn job. FML
by anda1000douchesscourthispostformistakes / 09/16/2015 at 9:42am / United States (Connecticut) / Work
by MedHistory / 09/15/2015 at 4:40pm / Canada (Quebec) / Work
by Anon / 09/06/2015 at 8:50am / United Kingdom (Staffordshire) / Love
by Anonymous / 09/06/2015 at 1:38am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love
by FuckThis / 08/31/2015 at 9:16am / United Kingdom (Cardiff) / Intimacy
Today, I found dog poop in my room that had probably been there for days. My girlfriend, who was watching the house, said she didn't realize it was there, because she thought it was the smell of her own farts. FML
by Anonymous / 08/29/2015 at 8:06pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals
Today, marks the third girlfriend in a row that has broken up with me for my terrible dandruff. I can't control it as I was born with psoriasis. All three girls called me pathetic for "making up" a disease to try to get them to stay. FML
by babypenguin00 / 08/29/2015 at 3:20pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love
by Anonymous / 08/29/2015 at 7:28am / United States (California) / Love
by mumfordandsonimdisappointed / 08/29/2015 at 1:09am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out that I won't be able to attend my own wedding, because I'll be in a mandatory training class that doesn't allow people to take vacation for any reason. So now we've wasted $10,000, and I can't even fly home for one day. All because I got promoted unexpectedly. FML
by Anonymous / 08/28/2015 at 4:05pm / Italy (Friuli-Venezia Giulia) / Work
by Anonymous / 08/28/2015 at 3:21am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love
Today, after missing college for a week due to illness, I found out my "friends" were bullshitting me about us having to write an important no-extension Biology essay. Copious amounts of my sweat, snot and tears went into that desperation-fueled nightmare. Thanks, dickheads. FML
by Anonymous / 08/28/2015 at 2:39am / South Africa (Western Cape) / Work