About Dillyduzit : I am a very busy college junior working towards a psychology degree and a career in Clinical Psychology. I think the finer things in life include sleeping, cooking and baking, reading, and cuddling with my husband. Despite how the resting bitch face in my picture probably makes it seem, I'm a nice person :) Have a nice day!
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50 quality responses
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100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
Back from a party
An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.
Dillyduzit's favorite FMLs
Today, as always, I have Tourette's syndrome. It causes me to occasionally make a beeping noise. My boyfriend just figured out that if he beeps back, it makes me beep again. He thinks it's hilarious and won't stop. FML
by Beeper / 10/11/2014 at 3:07pm / United States (Illinois) / Love
by AgentOrion / 08/29/2014 at 12:16am / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 05/26/2014 at 11:53am / United States (California) / Love
by notbrowsingnow / 05/08/2014 at 7:46pm / United States / Work
Today, I found out the reason our toilet paper has been disappearing so fast recently isn't because my son is wanking like a gibbon as I first thought. He's just been using our shredder to make streamers out of the stuff, then hiding it all in a box in his closet. Fucking hell, son. FML
by Anonymous / 05/02/2014 at 10:04am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Kids
Today, while on a date, I went to take a sip of my drink, but for some reason I expected a straw to be there. I ended up wiggling my tongue and mouth around my glass looking for it as I kept my eyes on my date. It must've looked like I was trying to be seductive in the creepiest way possible. FML
by cunning glassist / 03/08/2014 at 3:53pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love
Today, I was walking through town with my hood up and noticed people giving me funny looks. It wasn't until I got home that I realised the umbrella I was holding over my head had been closed the whole time. FML
by Anonymous / 03/05/2014 at 9:09pm / United Kingdom (Portsmouth) / Miscellaneous
by Ohgodmother / 02/28/2014 at 4:06am / Australia (Tasmania) / Kids
Today, I went to pick up my goddaughter while her mother went to work. She was being fussy, and I was surprised when she was quiet in the car; I just figured she'd fallen asleep. I got to my house and realized I'd never put her in my car, she was still sitting in my friend's driveway. FML
by lyss / 02/16/2014 at 5:44pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids
by freed / 01/29/2014 at 12:13am / United States (Ohio) / Love
Today, I went to my first ever job interview. I thought I was doing well, until the recruiter asked why he should hire me. The only thing I could say was "Because I'm really, really nervous right now?" FML
by bebooneo / 01/23/2014 at 5:16pm / United States (Texas) / Work
by Anonymous / 01/10/2014 at 9:25pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Vincent / 01/02/2014 at 12:04am / United States (Kansas) / Intimacy
by hot_friend / 12/19/2013 at 1:13am / United States / Love
by NoNotCats =^._.^= / 09/03/2013 at 4:17am / United States (Arizona) / Health