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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Monday 18 September 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3483
  • Number of comments : 100
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About Dillyduzit : I am a very busy college sophomore working towards a psychology degree and a career in Clinical Psychology. I think the finer things in life include sleeping, cooking and baking, reading, and cuddling with my husband. Despite how the resting bitch face in my picture probably makes it seem, I'm a nice person :) Have a nice day!

Dillyduzit's page activity

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Dillyduzit's favorite FMLs

Today, while walking out of a store eating a candy bar, a homeless man tried to run up and steal my candy. I stuck a leg out and tripped him. The only thing I could think of to yell at him was, "Swiper no Swiping". My kids have ruined my coolness. FML


I agree, your life sucks (53) - you deserved it (18)

On 03/02/2015 at 11:57pm - misc - by Dad (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I dreamed I was wrestling an alligator. I quickly woke up to my girlfriend yelling and me holding her in a headlock. FML


I agree, your life sucks (37457) - you deserved it (5016)

On 08/29/2014 at 12:16am - misc - by AgentOrion - United States (Alabama)

Today, I told my girlfriend that I love her. She panicked and blurted out our S&M safeword. FML


I agree, your life sucks (47864) - you deserved it (6598)

On 05/26/2014 at 11:53am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was bored at work, so I started browsing the Internet. While I was on my Facebook page, my boss tagged me in a status: "I've been standing behind you for ten minutes." FML


I agree, your life sucks (23186) - you deserved it (47924)

On 05/08/2014 at 7:46pm - work - by notbrowsingnow (man) - United States

Today, I found out the reason our toilet paper has been disappearing so fast recently isn't because my son is wanking like a gibbon as I first thought. He's just been using our shredder to make streamers out of the stuff, then hiding it all in a box in his closet. Fucking hell, son. FML


I agree, your life sucks (37267) - you deserved it (4095)

On 05/02/2014 at 10:04am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, while on a date, I went to take a sip of my drink, but for some reason I expected a straw to be there. I ended up wiggling my tongue and mouth around my glass looking for it as I kept my eyes on my date. It must've looked like I was trying to be seductive in the creepiest way possible. FML


I agree, your life sucks (48105) - you deserved it (9579)

On 03/08/2014 at 3:53pm - love - by cunning glassist (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was walking through town with my hood up and noticed people giving me funny looks. It wasn't until I got home that I realised the umbrella I was holding over my head had been closed the whole time. FML


I agree, your life sucks (37022) - you deserved it (14786)

On 03/05/2014 at 9:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Portsmouth)

Today, in public, one of my mom's friends asked me how on earth did I get so tall, my mom happily scampered to my side and shrieked: 'TWO YEARS OF BREAST MILK'. FML


I agree, your life sucks (39445) - you deserved it (3526)

On 02/28/2014 at 4:06am - kids - by Ohgodmother (man) - Australia (Tasmania)

Today, I went to pick up my goddaughter while her mother went to work. She was being fussy, and I was surprised when she was quiet in the car; I just figured she'd fallen asleep. I got to my house and realized I'd never put her in my car, she was still sitting in my friend's driveway. FML


I agree, your life sucks (19864) - you deserved it (45995)

On 02/16/2014 at 5:44pm - kids - by lyss - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend finally succeeded in unhooking my bra with one hand, excitedly exclaiming, "Boobies be free!" FML


I agree, your life sucks (44427) - you deserved it (11474)

On 01/29/2014 at 12:13am - love - by freed - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went to my first ever job interview. I thought I was doing well, until the recruiter asked why he should hire me. The only thing I could say was "Because I'm really, really nervous right now?" FML

Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML


I agree, your life sucks (46461) - you deserved it (8739)

On 01/10/2014 at 9:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I asked my mom why she had two tooth brushes: one manual and one electric. She said: "I only use the manual one for brushing my teeth." FML


I agree, your life sucks (49358) - you deserved it (7791)

On 01/02/2014 at 12:04am - intimacy - by Vincent - United States (Kansas)

Today, my boyfriend said he was in love with my best friend instead of me. I wouldn't be so upset if it wasn't the third boyfriend in a row this happened with. FML


I agree, your life sucks (51950) - you deserved it (4491)

On 12/19/2013 at 1:13am - love - by hot_friend (woman) - United States

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