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Decorus

Offline (the 10/09/2014 at 6:59am) | Search for a member

Decorus

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 84
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Decorus : Hey I'm Emma. Just here for the laughs.

Decorus's page activity

Visits<b>morondon000</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 8:05pm<b>matt300</b> - the 01/06/2014 at 4:16pm<b>lydiaterry</b> - the 07/06/2013 at 4:30pm<b>melody309</b> - the 06/14/2013 at 1:25am<b>man_in_black08</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 6:38pm<b>civic690</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 5:43pm<b>murdaloco</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 5:30pm<b>heffastera</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 4:18pm<b>44LynnLynn</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 4:17pm<b>kingakbari</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 4:12pm<b>xxGheTToGumbYxx</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 2:52pm<b>d2d2d2</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 2:50pm<b>nissanleaf</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 2:22pm<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 2:08pm<b>golden_warrior</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 1:52pm<b>pantherfan0877</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 1:30pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 1:25pm<b>hellobobismyname</b> - the 06/13/2013 at 1:19pm

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Decorus's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend wanted me to get a shirt saying "I'm a girl," just so people won't think he's gay. FML

#21104753
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37649) - you deserved it (5426)

On 04/04/2014 at 9:57pm - misc - by Violet (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, a man asked me on a date. It's been so long, I accepted immediately. He began quoting what seemed like random numbers to me, and it took me a few minutes to work out what he meant. Not only was I mistaken for a prostitute, I'm also worth, at most, $60. FML

#21102227
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39875) - you deserved it (4422)

On 04/01/2014 at 8:02pm - love - by that kind of girl (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was using a public toilet, when someone in the next stall reached under, grabbed at my low-hanging toilet paper and pulled at it at an insane speed, whispering some kind of weird chant. Then he suddenly stopped, screamed, and ran out. What the hell happened in there? FML

#20723415
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47605) - you deserved it (3159)

On 06/13/2013 at 12:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my crush asked to use my phone so he could Google something. Flattered that he wanted to use my phone, I agreed. After he was done, he handed it back with a weird look. I later realized he had found himself in my top searches. FML

#20058304
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7879) - you deserved it (25914)

On 09/05/2012 at 12:29am - misc - by Gigi (woman) - United States

Today, my friend told me that semen was inflammable. Later at night I jacked off into a sock and then, excitedly, tried to lit the sock on fire. Turns out, semen is very much not inflammable. Naked, I shook my sock in the air so it would extinguish while my semen splashed out all over my room. FML

#3262847
376 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8953) - you deserved it (115255)

On 06/27/2009 at 12:41am - intimacy - by notinflammable (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

#527227
523 comments

I agree, your life sucks (243292) - you deserved it (32206)

On 03/22/2009 at 6:38am - intimacy - by konens_dick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was a TA for a history class and the class was taking a test. About halfway through, I noticed one kid had a small piece of paper in his hand. I ran up the row, grabbed his test, and ripped it into four pieces. Then I took the note from him. It said "I believe in you, -Mom." FML

#142104
963 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73433) - you deserved it (427506)

On 02/26/2009 at 10:30am - work - by Noname - United States (Michigan)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
506 comments

I agree, your life sucks (236222) - you deserved it (82003)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend handcuffed me to the bed, naked. Someone pulled the fire alarm, and my boyfriend couldn't find the key. So he left me, and the Resident Advisor found me. The fireman had to cut the chain. FML

#12567
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (283416) - you deserved it (51943)

On 02/06/2009 at 10:55pm - misc - by hahahehehohohoo (woman) - United States (California)



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