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DeathofCareBear

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DeathofCareBear

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : ,
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 11 August 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5863
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About DeathofCareBear : When it comes to suicide missions I'm the bomb.

DeathofCareBear's page activity

Visits<b>sjmac24</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 11:39pm<b>Ashd09</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 1:35pm<b>pandaxpress</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 12:25am<b>steelersfan501</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 7:27pm<b>GrimReefer66</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 1:40pm<b>carilica</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 6:38pm<b>senor_octubre</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 5:17pm<b>McIntian</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 12:10am<b>Hop6e</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 11:17pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 11:14pm<b>smallandroid</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 7:50pm<b>TheDanBexfield</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 7:07am<b>Dusty_Cups</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 7:50pm<b>Roskie</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 7:02pm<b>Doritozilla</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 4:28pm<b>kerstileann</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 12:18am<b>jesterinperil</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 10:35pm<b>bolanle2nv</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 12:19pm

Fucked!<b>senor_octubre</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 11:17pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 5:13am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 01/31/2015 at 9:45pm

DeathofCareBear's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of DeathofCareBear's badges

DeathofCareBear's favorite FMLs

Today, I met my fiancé's much older sister for the first time. Turns out she is actually my old high school English teacher who used to make me cry at least 3 times a week. It's been three hours and I've accidentally called her Miss Willow 4 times and been reduced to tears twice. FML

#21462491
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21789) - you deserved it (2350)

On 08/30/2015 at 8:13am - misc - by Alice (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, my brother said he was cleaning his room. When I walked in, he was giving my cousin a blowjob. FML

#21462259
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19905) - you deserved it (1658)

On 08/29/2015 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I turned in an essay about a book I'd read over the summer. My teacher later called me to her desk and began to gush about how interesting the book sounded and asked to borrow my copy. The book I wrote about is not real, and the main characters are named after my childhood pets. FML

#21458720
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20488) - you deserved it (14473)

On 08/21/2015 at 1:15am - misc - by technicallywroteabook (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found my daughter sobbing and trying to stick a wad of gauze to her vagina. She was having her first period. FML

#21453304
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23498) - you deserved it (9931)

On 08/07/2015 at 10:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went over to talk to my boss. I must have snuck up on her because she was masturbating through her pants. She stopped and I had to chat away, pretending I didn't notice. FML

#21452257
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23023) - you deserved it (1633)

On 08/05/2015 at 1:56pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I met my wife's mistress, at the maternity ward in the hospital, after she gave birth to our second child. FML

#21451505
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23046) - you deserved it (1927)

On 08/03/2015 at 9:28pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Alaska)

Today, on the bus, my blood sugar level got too low and I passed out. When I came to, the woman next to me was hitting me, saying she needed to get off and that she didn't have time for my "stupid fucking prank". FML

#21445474
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28244) - you deserved it (1835)

On 07/22/2015 at 1:35pm - health - by qhorin halflung (woman) -

Today, while on my Dad's computer, I looked through the browser history to find the name of a website I'd visited on it the other day. I soon found out he watches a staggering amount of downright frightening incest porn. I'm disturbed on so many levels. FML

#21445392
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25829) - you deserved it (3125)

On 07/22/2015 at 7:52am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was working at the local grocery store and a customer of mine, who had only bought two granola bars and was holding up my line, tried to convert me to Christianity. Out of all the people to target, she chose the shy atheist who just wanted to do her minimum wage job in peace. FML

#21445275
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24554) - you deserved it (2620)

On 07/22/2015 at 12:20am - work - by Quortney - United States

Today, I was fired from my dream job for being pregnant. Apparently, you can't teach children while growing one inside you. FML

#21444439
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32068) - you deserved it (2276)

On 07/20/2015 at 10:29am - work - by mrsmahdi - United States (California)

Today, I spent hours cooking a big dinner for my parents for the first time. I guess I made the steak too rare, because when my dad cut into it, he said "Christ! This thing's practically alive!" and said a skilled vet could probably bring the cow it was cut from back to life. FML

#21443824
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21931) - you deserved it (3564)

On 07/19/2015 at 1:05am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I went downstairs early in the morning to watch a movie. As I walked into the living room and reached for the light switch, I heard my dad say "Knew you'd change your mind. Get them panties off." followed by the sound of a zipper being undone. I've never been so mortified in my life. FML

#21442030
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33716) - you deserved it (2466)

On 07/15/2015 at 12:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went down a water slide. Halfway through, I got stuck behind some kids who were blocking the tube. Seconds later, a big-boned lady crashed into my back. Her solution to break the blockade was to start kicking my back repeatedly as hard as she could. The kids still wouldn't move. FML

#21441433
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28213) - you deserved it (1744)

On 07/14/2015 at 6:33am - misc - by ow my kidneys (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, my grandpa accidentally posted a nude photo of himself on Facebook. I will never be able to unsee that. FML

#21440426
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27341) - you deserved it (1990)

On 07/12/2015 at 10:21am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, at 3 in the morning, I was getting out of bed to use the bathroom, when my boyfriend grabbed my arm, looked at me wide-eyed and begged, "Don't... They'll take your skin..." He doesn't remember saying it, and now I'm scared shitless to use the bathroom at night. FML

#21439825
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27742) - you deserved it (2387)

On 07/10/2015 at 11:49pm - misc - by Julianapilikusplatosophophes (woman) - Australia (Victoria)



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