Death_The_Kid15

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Offline (the 11/21/2016 at 12:35am)

Death_The_Kid15

7Fucked!

Death_The_Kid15Death_The_Kid15
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 18 January 1947 (69 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 926
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Death_The_Kid15 : Skar Skar Skarnerrr!

Death_The_Kid15's page activity

Visits<b>Tripartita</b> - the 11/09/2016 at 5:17pm<b>PopTarts513</b> - the 09/19/2016 at 2:56pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 09/08/2016 at 1:34pm<b>Arestian</b> - the 09/07/2016 at 3:37pm<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 09/06/2016 at 1:16pm<b>andrmac</b> - the 09/04/2016 at 3:14pm<b>anonymous0110902</b> - the 08/06/2016 at 6:05pm<b>MamaChey</b> - the 07/27/2016 at 12:35am<b>CDtrasher</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 2:24am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 07/17/2016 at 3:21pm<b>nhatt</b> - the 07/01/2016 at 12:31am<b>llama_monicz</b> - the 06/27/2016 at 11:51am<b>billcosby31</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 10:41pm<b>FitFriday</b> - the 06/11/2016 at 1:50am<b>shupwhup</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 6:49am<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 06/04/2016 at 11:21pm<b>Mikro901</b> - the 06/02/2016 at 5:00am<b>naterbug8278</b> - the 06/01/2016 at 7:45pm

Fucked!<b>PopTarts513</b> - the 09/19/2016 at 8:56pm<b>andrmac</b> - the 08/30/2016 at 12:53am<b>CDtrasher</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 8:24am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 07/17/2016 at 9:21pm<b>billcosby31</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 4:41am<b>hannah_cheers</b> - the 09/14/2015 at 1:53am<b>FitFriday</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 8:16pm

Death_The_Kid15's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

See all of Death_The_Kid15's badges

Death_The_Kid15's favorite FMLs

Today, I was woken up by my dad and my dog barking at each other, and my dad yelling, "I am the Alpha male!" FML

by DumbassRoaster / 07/10/2016 at 3:44pm / United States (North Carolina) / Animals

Today, I've been begging my boyfriend to get us a dog for months now. This morning, I noticed he'd bought some toilet paper with dogs printed on it. I asked him if it was a sign. He replied, "Yeah, one you can stick up your ass." FML

by Confession / 05/15/2016 at 10:07pm / Belgium / Animals

Today, a drunk woman kicked me in the balls for not buying her another drink. That's the closest thing to intimacy I've ever experienced. FML

by Anonymous / 04/17/2016 at 1:27pm / Austria (Wien) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried to blink out a small speck of dirt that was caught in my eye. Instead, I learned what it feels like to suffocate a small, angry spider with your eyelid. FML

by Anonymous / 09/04/2014 at 2:44am / United States (Michigan) / Animals

Today, while at work as a telemarketer, I called a customer on his home phone. Once I was connected, an automated voice said, "To speak with a customer, please press 1." Confused, I pressed one. I then heard loud laughter followed by, "Oh my god! What a dumbass!" before they hung up. FML

by Anonymous / 05/07/2014 at 11:57pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, marks the third week since my sister's guinea pig learned to masturbate. He humps his wheel and makes squeaking noises for five minutes, then rolls over on his side and pants heavily. He does it at least twice a night while I'm trying to sleep. FML

by Anonomous / 12/28/2013 at 7:31pm / United States (Vermont) / Animals

Today, I was escorted out of a grocery store for beating my boyfriend with a block of cheese. FML

by cricketsins / 11/07/2013 at 10:33pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, as my wife and I were getting intimate, I thought I would try a little "dirty talk". I whispered in her ear that I would "dick her down good". She couldn't stop laughing. FML

by Something I said? / 11/05/2013 at 10:26am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my 14-year-old son showed me a "bird's egg" he was looking after in his room. It was a dried up dog turd. FML

by Facepalmum / 01/10/2013 at 1:28am / Australia (Victoria) / Kids

Today, I was brutally dumped over webcam, by my boyfriend, who was taking a dump with the laptop on his lap. FML

by Toilettrash / 07/06/2012 at 6:51am / United States / Love

Today, I spent 3 hours trying to read my dog's mind. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2012 at 2:57am / United States / Animals

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to let my 19-month-old son watch me pee, since I'm trying to potty train him. I didn't consider that he might try to grab my penis. When he did, I was startled and peed all over the floor and my son. Good job dad. FML

by Anonymous / 11/09/2011 at 4:52pm / United States / Kids

Today, I came back home to find that my house had been robbed, one week after my neighbors. I was walking around my neighborhood to see if anything was suspicious, and discovered that my neighbors had put up a sign, reading: "Rob the neighbors, THEY don't have a security system." FML

by TheAnnoyedNeighbor / 10/03/2011 at 2:08am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went on a date with a seemingly nice guy I met online. He was drunk when I got there. Within the first 10 minutes, he had told me I was "like Hitler but with boobs", and I was "offensive to the ninja community." Then he said I just wasn't all he had hoped for and left. FML

by ninja_blasphemer / 07/25/2011 at 3:24pm / Ireland (Wexford) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

by sucks / 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm / United States (Georgia) / Animals