About DeathBunny218 : :
Please allow me to introduce myself
I'm a man of wealth and taste,
I've been around for a long long year; stolen many a man's soul and faith.
I was around when Jesus Christ had his moment of doubt and pain,
Made damn sure that Pilate washed his hands and sealed his fate.
Pleased to meet you, hope you guess my name
But what's puzzling you is the nature of my game
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
I’m your new creative director
You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.
Today, the kids I teach informed me that I had spelled my name incorrectly on the board. I looked at it and assured them that I had spelled it correctly. I'm 22 and a graduate student, they're six and mentally challenged. Guess who was right? FML
I agree, your life sucks (13828) - you deserved it (53681)
On 03/10/2009 at 11:46am - work - by Noname (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was in my backyard scolding my cat. I yelled, "If you can't learn to use the bathroom correctly then I am going to leave your stupid butt out here in the snow until you figure it out!!" Later, my neighbor left me a nasty note about child abuse - she thought I was scolding my son. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40351) - you deserved it (8764)
On 03/09/2009 at 9:16pm - kids - by flaggurl (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I had a job interview. I stopped to take a pee in the lobby before I went in. I relaxed a bit too much at the urinal and accidentally farted. I chuckled about it like a 5-year old for a few seconds. The guy that had been next to me at the urinal was the interviewer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15687) - you deserved it (35278)
On 03/09/2009 at 6:45pm - work - by ADH2000 (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I was in spanish class, having a debate about the death penalty. When I went to make a point, I meant to say "La pena de muerte", which means "The death penalty". I said, "La pene de muerte". Turns out that means, "The penis of death". FML
I agree, your life sucks (21708) - you deserved it (35691)
On 03/04/2009 at 12:42pm - misc - by Señor Guapo (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I was walking through Borders with my girlfriend, when we pass a girl scout cookies stand. I see a box of Samoas, my favorite, point at them, and shout, 'YEAH'. My girlfriend looks shocked. Behind the box of cookies was a five year old scout bending over, with her bottom pointed at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47133) - you deserved it (11845)
On 03/01/2009 at 12:55pm - misc - by Scottrick (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was typing up a love letter on my computer. A sexual love letter. I was in a classroom, I'm the teacher, I'm gay, and my love letter showed up on the tv screen while my 7th grade students were taking a test. It was up on the screen for 15 minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55315) - you deserved it (215821)
On 03/01/2009 at 4:08am - intimacy - by Sad (man) - United States (California)
Today, I went to get a sports physical at a hospital. My nurse was morbidly obese and unattractive. She told me she would go through the tests listed on the sheet. She did everything, including feeling my genitalia. When it was done, I read over the sheet. Genitalia wasn't a test listed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (126482) - you deserved it (3736)
On 02/28/2009 at 4:58pm - health - by TahRah (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I told my dad I was leaving to get some beauty sleep. He looked at me laughing and said "See you in a decade." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34119) - you deserved it (5337)
On 02/16/2009 at 10:05am - misc - by mags (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I started a fight at a lesbian bar and lost. I'm a man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11621) - you deserved it (65020)
On 02/15/2009 at 5:43am - misc - by Mofisto (man) - United States (California)
Today, I wore a cute new striped shirt to work. One of my co-workers said to me "I like your shirt. Most fat people don't look good in horizontals." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25083) - you deserved it (3196)
On 02/09/2009 at 1:47pm - misc - by alie (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I learnt that nail polish remover is, in fact, VERY flammable. And I learnt it the hard way. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4842) - you deserved it (29687)
On 02/09/2009 at 4:21am - misc - by adrenochrome (woman) - Lithuania (Vilniaus Apskritis)
Today, while my 4 year old nephew was hugging me, he stepped back and declared, "Auntie, my Pee-do is hard, but it will go away." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24777) - you deserved it (2138)
On 02/05/2009 at 8:30pm - misc - by Fag_Hag (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I spent $400 at the stripclub and got 4 phone numbers. I as walked out of the club, I noticed it was tranny-night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6785) - you deserved it (33747)
On 02/02/2009 at 11:42pm - money - by bluntedone (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, just another casual morning. I went to go drop a deuce in the bathroom. Barely being awake I didn't notice my roommates had put glad wrap between the seat and toilet, so i got piss and shit all over me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12450) - you deserved it (3079)
On 01/23/2009 at 5:45am - misc - by ohn0es - United States (Kansas)
Today, I got a mailer from Adam and Eve with a bunch of hard core porn ads inside. I have been getting these since i ordered a Pirate porn video a few months ago. I was gone for a few weeks overseas. My mother in law was getting the mail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3926) - you deserved it (6083)
On 01/22/2009 at 4:31pm - love - by Noname - United States (Texas)
Monday 20 May 2013
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