About DeadxManxWalking : "I am the same as you, a dead man walking on the surface of the earth."
Hi, my name is Malik. I enjoy meeting new people and making people laugh and smile. I LOVE wolves, music, and video games.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today, after an amazing sex session, my boyfriend rolls over and stares lovingly into my eyes, puts his hand on my cheek caressing it tenderly... and says "Who's a good piggy?" in his best Homer Simpson's voice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17075) - you deserved it (3238)
On 09/30/2009 at 4:28am - intimacy - by homersgirl (woman) - United States (Mississippi)
Today, while my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch, he looked down at my chest and said "I can't wait for the day that these produce milk." We've only been dating a few months and I have no intention of lactating anytime soon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14202) - you deserved it (1856)
On 09/27/2009 at 4:57pm - intimacy - by e11ie (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was cleaning out from underneath my bed and found a used condom. I've never had sex in my own room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17434) - you deserved it (1412)
On 09/24/2009 at 4:57pm - intimacy - by Madison43097 (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was at a party with my boyfriend meeting all of his friends for the first time. My boyfriend went into the kitchen to get me a drink, and after ten minutes I went looking for him. I discovered his friend holding two melons to his chest, mid explanation on how they look exactly like mine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25844) - you deserved it (4826)
On 09/20/2009 at 8:00am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my (now former) best friend kicked me out of the band I started because I wasn't 'dedicated enough' after a 3 day 'holiday' to visit my dying uncle. He also during this 3 day 'holiday' convinced my girl friend to leave me and date him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46089) - you deserved it (2167)
On 09/16/2009 at 4:25am - misc - by dj163 (man) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I was shaving and I sneezed unexpectedly. I ended up cutting myself so badly that I had to go to the emergency room. It wouldn't have been quite so humiliating if I hadn't been forced to show the extremely attractive doctor my sliced open and half shaved crotch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17763) - you deserved it (3341)
On 09/14/2009 at 8:58am - intimacy - by Humiliated (woman) - United States
Today, I went to a restaurant with some friends. I noticed a very cute waitress about my age, so I walked over to her and asked if she had a boyfriend. The extremely fit, attractive waiter standing next to her immediately turned, held out his hand and goes, "Yeah. Meet me." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24439) - you deserved it (9426)
On 09/13/2009 at 1:14am - misc - by footinmouth (man) - United States (Kansas)
Today, my fiancée broke up with me because I "don't know what I'm doing with my future". I've done four years in the Marines and am in the process of becoming an officer. She has a film degree which she has no interest in, works at the mall, and just moved back in with her dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36104) - you deserved it (2197)
On 09/11/2009 at 1:11pm - love - by TankTankTank (man) - United States (Idaho)
Today, I was at work. I'm a sign spinner. Lots of other employees shares stories of how they have been flashed by 18 year old hot chicks as they drive by. I got flashed by a 45 year old, 300lbs lady. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31721) - you deserved it (3717)
On 09/01/2009 at 7:44am - work - by spinner (man) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I was at a club with my girlfriend of a year. A guy starts hitting on her while I'm sitting right next to her. He then asks her to go back to his place for some fun, I start laughing thinking that there is no chance she would even consider this. I walked home alone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49227) - you deserved it (857)
On 08/26/2009 at 8:37pm - love - by lonelyboy101 (man) - United States (California)
Today, I farted while I was in line at the bank. I tried to pretend it wasn't me by looking at the man behind me and turning back with a disgusted look on my face. I thought I had gotten away with it when the man yells "It wasn't me, this bitch did it". FML
I agree, your life sucks (6111) - you deserved it (72754)
On 08/19/2009 at 7:39am - misc - by moutz (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was home alone. I didn't expect anyone to be anywhere near home, so when I got out of the shower, I walked to the living room, naked, to get the tv remote for my room. Only to find the UPS guy standing at our glass front door. I screamed... so did he. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32249) - you deserved it (12812)
On 08/11/2009 at 10:01am - misc - by Lilly_28 (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was in the middle of an intense orgasm when we heard the panicky voice of his little sister saying there was an emergency downstairs. He jumped up and left to see what the matter was. The big emergency? The Wii remotes had dead batteries. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45920) - you deserved it (6705)
On 08/05/2009 at 9:04am - intimacy - by some_girl_19 (woman) - United States (Maine)
Today, I was handling corrosive chemicals when I accidentally spilled a beaker of Hydrochloric Acid on myself. I had to strip naked and use the emergency shower with my boss and my hot coworker watching. The worst part was when I realized my coworker was laughing at the size of my penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44775) - you deserved it (4903)
On 08/03/2009 at 2:33pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I decided to visit my girlfriend who lives 20 hours away. Four Red Bulls: $11.50. Gas: $200. Driving halfway across the country to find your girlfriend in bed with another guy? FML
I agree, your life sucks (67821) - you deserved it (3905)
On 08/03/2009 at 1:15am - love - by Tuck_My_Life (man) - United States (New Hampshire)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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