Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

DeadxManxWalking

Search for a member

DeadxManxWalking

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7369
  • Number of comments : 506
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About DeadxManxWalking : "I am the same as you, a dead man walking on the surface of the earth."

Hi, my name is Malik. I enjoy meeting new people and making people laugh and smile. I LOVE wolves, music, and video games.

DeadxManxWalking's page activity

Visits<b>sarcasticlover</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 2:29pm<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 06/11/2014 at 9:35am<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 7:23am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 12:15am<b>lisaint</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 6:09pm<b>Demonking</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 9:15pm<b>AngelXsky</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 11:16pm<b>Virince</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 8:17pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 12:10am<b>Sethpe</b> - the 12/19/2013 at 1:15pm<b>Rizzen</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 10:22am<b>EllaJSwiftie</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 3:23pm<b>ashley69hott</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 6:31pm<b>ThriceWritten</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 5:46pm<b>cmchewy</b> - the 09/23/2013 at 6:46pm<b>Crazyfudge</b> - the 09/07/2013 at 6:05pm<b>Springer324</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 7:35am<b>MR_GUERR0</b> - the 06/20/2013 at 10:23am

DeadxManxWalking's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of DeadxManxWalking's badges

DeadxManxWalking's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out what it feels like to get hit in the head with a bat. Not the wooden kind though. The one that bites and claws you when it gets stuck in your hair. FML

#19309925
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20574) - you deserved it (1478)

On 03/19/2012 at 9:03pm - animals - by CA19oo - United States (Georgia)

Today, my mum cleaned my room. When I got home she yelled at me for having condoms. I'm 24 years old and in a long term relationship. FML

#19305952
297 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26448) - you deserved it (10814)

On 03/19/2012 at 3:36am - intimacy - by rahrahcakes (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I found out why teenage boys have "Keep out" and "Please knock" signs on their bedroom doors. FML

#19305643
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9916) - you deserved it (46022)

On 03/19/2012 at 1:49am - intimacy - by ari - United States

Today, since I'm too broke to get a new one, I had to duct tape my bra. FML

#19303310
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25010) - you deserved it (2899)

On 03/18/2012 at 8:51pm - money - by liver (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was walking to a café with my soon-to-be boss. While crossing a busy street, I slipped in a puddle and accidentally grabbed his junk to catch myself. FML

#19299897
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23390) - you deserved it (2605)

On 03/18/2012 at 11:04am - work - by cachucy - United States (Illinois)

Today, I walked into the kitchen to eat some breakfast. I got a full visual of my drunk neighbor dancing naked in my backyard. FML

#19297071
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20642) - you deserved it (1722)

On 03/17/2012 at 10:41pm - misc - by vanorav (man) - United States (California)

Today, while I was cuddling with my girlfriend, she looked at me and leaned in. Thinking she was going to kiss me, I leaned too. Just as we were about to kiss, she screamed "COW KISSES" and somehow managed to lick my eyeball. FML

#19297004
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25616) - you deserved it (4325)

On 03/17/2012 at 10:32pm - love - by Brian - United States (Washington)

Today, a little girl looked at me and yelled "Mommy look, there's a real leprechaun!" FML

#19296318
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18995) - you deserved it (1698)

On 03/17/2012 at 8:48pm - kids - by Redhead4life (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, a little girl looked at me and yelled "Mommy look, there's a real leprechaun!" FML

#19296318
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18995) - you deserved it (1698)

On 03/17/2012 at 8:48pm - kids - by Redhead4life (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my mom was put in jail for beating the shit out of my dad. FML

#19291584
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33756) - you deserved it (2543)

On 03/17/2012 at 12:53am - misc - by Taylor Easley - United States (California)

Today, I was watching a kid at school walk like a gangster. My teacher was standing there, so I stood behind the kid and walked like him, laughing to myself, at which point my teacher took me to one side and told me the kid was handicapped. FML

#19277499
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8604) - you deserved it (52246)

On 03/14/2012 at 4:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I was masturbating, and out of the corner of my eye I saw a figure. It was my neighbor staring at me through the window with a total look of disgust. I moved in this weekend and hadn't yet introduced myself to her. FML

#19277377
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12821) - you deserved it (27186)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML

#19276120
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28744) - you deserved it (18028)

On 03/14/2012 at 3:51am - misc - by daddy-o - United States (Utah)

Today, I hooked up with my ex-girlfriend, after she confessed to still being in love with me. I logged into Facebook after she left, only to find her status set to "I think I just made a big mistake." FML

#19272838
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20138) - you deserved it (7091)

On 03/13/2012 at 7:12pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my therapist gave me some great self-sufficiency advice. It sounded familiar. When I got home I realized she had been quoting Christina Aguilera songs. For £100 an hour. FML

#19271086
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23428) - you deserved it (3478)

On 03/13/2012 at 1:33pm - health - by PixieWrists - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)



FML's blog

  • Élodie's Illustrated FML
  • Aaaaah, the beach, the sunshine, cool water against our skin...  Nah, just kidding, I can't afford a trip to the beach. This blog is being written from a grotty apartment in the less salubrious parts of…

Friday 18 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: