DeadxManxWalking

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DeadxManxWalking

30Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 5 July 1995 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 19384
  • Number of comments : 766
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About DeadxManxWalking : "I am the same as you, a dead man walking on the surface of the earth."

Hi, my name is Malik. I enjoy meeting new people and making people laugh and smile. I LOVE wolves, music, and video games.

DeadxManxWalking's page activity

Visits<b>ItnHmn</b> - the 09/26/2016 at 1:59pm<b>mcr101</b> - the 09/22/2016 at 12:31am<b>Lady_Spaghetti</b> - the 09/06/2016 at 2:49am<b>puppies1234</b> - the 08/28/2016 at 1:15am<b>alkanbigdick</b> - the 08/26/2016 at 12:24pm<b>sweetybaybeC</b> - the 08/25/2016 at 12:07am<b>TheAspieDork</b> - the 08/23/2016 at 10:18pm<b>herecomestheboom</b> - the 08/21/2016 at 9:09pm<b>queenariii</b> - the 08/20/2016 at 1:44am<b>poppunkette</b> - the 08/18/2016 at 7:02am<b>OlRed</b> - the 08/14/2016 at 4:47pm<b>CamBen</b> - the 08/04/2016 at 7:07am<b>tipperO1</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 8:10pm<b>jmagd781</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 10:33am<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 07/28/2016 at 9:44am<b>Wishe</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 10:23am<b>dontknow1</b> - the 07/23/2016 at 4:47pm<b>SomeshCD</b> - the 07/19/2016 at 1:44pm

Fucked!<b>ItnHmn</b> - the 09/19/2016 at 5:35am<b>Lady_Spaghetti</b> - the 09/06/2016 at 8:49am<b>SomeshCD</b> - the 07/19/2016 at 7:44pm<b>pointlesswaffle</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 9:47am<b>queenariii</b> - the 07/12/2016 at 6:13pm<b>unadultfangirl</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 9:04am<b>InfiniteSunshine</b> - the 06/09/2016 at 8:55am<b>princessshaybaby</b> - the 05/31/2016 at 8:49am<b>Dexter_39476</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 11:42pm<b>nityasomaiya</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 5:07am<b>YDISM</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 7:43pm<b>psychoIogical</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 5:49am<b>399</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 9:59pm<b>delichick</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 12:26am<b>Exodiafinder687</b> - the 05/15/2016 at 8:13pm<b>3051628</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 7:09pm<b>Echo13243</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 9:27pm<b>USMC10Rex12451</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 12:18am

DeadxManxWalking's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of DeadxManxWalking's badges

DeadxManxWalking's favorite FMLs

Today, I got stuck in traffic when a shootout started somewhere behind. I lowered myself and suddenly a bullet punctured a hole in the rear screen. When I managed to get away, I called my wife in a panic. She didn't pick up so I sent her a text about what just happened. Her reply: "K". FML

by n3ov / 02/25/2013 at 11:33pm / Pakistan (Islamabad) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend made me play Slender. I was so terrified, I stopped playing 10 minutes in. Tonight, I kept hearing noises outside. When I peered out through the window, a bald figure in a suit was staring back at me. I shrieked in absolute terror; he burst out laughing. It was my boyfriend. FML

by stillfuckingcrying / 02/24/2013 at 4:20pm / Sweden (Kalmar Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, after months of a very healthy sex life with my boyfriend, he asked me to let him try anal. I'm dead-set against it, so I tried to let him down easy by jokingly saying that I would, but only if he let me try it on him first. He said, "Sure." Fuck. FML

by Anonymous / 02/23/2013 at 1:27pm / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Intimacy

Today, after being in the hospital for 2 weeks after emergency abdominal surgery, my girlfriend, who didn't even bother to ask how I was, made me hobble to her house just to dump me and send me straight back home. FML

by noname / 02/17/2013 at 8:28pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, while at church, I received a text from my girlfriend, saying, "It's not working. We're over." Not only was my phone not on silent mode, I was sitting directly beside my now ex-girlfriend. FML

by Anonymous / 02/17/2013 at 5:44pm / Hungary (Szeged) / Love

Today, my brother was arrested for starting a fistfight at a funeral. He didn't even know the deceased; he's just been crashing funerals recently, hoping to hook up with mourners. I'm not sure who's more pathetic: him for doing such a thing, or me for bailing his fucking dumb arse out of jail. FML

by an idiot / 02/16/2013 at 1:03pm / Australia / Money

Today, my father gave me his blessing to be married on one condition: that I keep my maiden name when I marry. My fiancé thought it would be "epic". My last name will be hyphenated to Cobb-Webb. FML

by MsCobb / 02/16/2013 at 10:27am / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, a girl came up to me on the street and said, "You have like no swag, bro." Feeling clever, I said, "At least I have a high school education." She then took out her work ID, showing me that she was a surgeon, flipped me off, then walked away saying, "This is totally going on Facebook." FML

by Anonymous / 02/11/2013 at 10:26am / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, I was talking to the girl I really like, and she was telling me how crappy her day was. Trying to be nice, I gave her a back rub. I somehow managed to unhook her bra. FML

by Anonymous / 02/09/2013 at 12:13am / United States / Love

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my overprotective father. My boyfriend started out with, "Sir, it is an honor to be your daughter's sexual partner." FML

by mydadsgonnakillme / 02/08/2013 at 2:13am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, after weeks of practice, I proudly did 9 chin-ups on my chin-up bar. As soon as I was done, my 11-year-old daughter came over and banged out 12 of them. Then she wiped her sweaty hands off and did 8 more. Then she gave me pointers on my technique. FML

by WeakerThanaLittleGirl / 02/04/2013 at 8:00pm / United States / Health

Today, my friend asked me to fix his laptop for him because it is loaded with viruses. When I turned it on and started searching for the problem, I couldn't find it. Luckily I was able to find a video of him banging my girlfriend. We've been together for eight years. FML

by hamandegger / 02/04/2013 at 3:17pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, the guy that I've liked for a while but never had the courage to talk to was wearing a TARDIS shirt. I jokingly asked, "Are you the Doctor?" His response was for me to "Go away, f***ing nerd." FML

by guessnot / 02/03/2013 at 9:16pm / Canada (Ontario) / Geek

Today, for the first time in weeks, my wife felt frisky, and we started fooling around. Half-way through undressing me, she bolted out, claiming she had the shits. About five minutes later, she tearfully called out from the bathroom, begging me to bring her a fresh roll of toilet paper. FML

by FUCK GOD / 02/03/2013 at 6:04pm / Argentina (Salta) / Love

Today, my girlfriend asked me if she looked fat in her new pair of jeans. Knowing I was probably about two seconds away from all hell breaking loose, I instinctively tried to save my game, before remembering I wasn't playing a video game. I really need to get a life. FML

by Anonymous / 02/03/2013 at 4:57pm / Australia / Love