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DeadxManxWalking

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DeadxManxWalking
  • Town/Country : Ask me, USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4159
  • Number of comments : 503
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About DeadxManxWalking : "I am the same as you, a dead man walking on the surface of the earth."

Hi, my name is Malik. I enjoy meeting new people and making people laugh and smile. I LOVE wolves, music, and video games.

DeadxManxWalking's last visitors

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DeadxManxWalking's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of DeadxManxWalking's badges

DeadxManxWalking's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home earlier than usual, only to find my wife having sex with some guy on our bed. Her reaction to being confronted was to look me dead in the eyes and to scream and scream until I got so freaked out that I left. It's her house, and I'm sitting in a library with no idea what to do. FML

#19539358
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36519) - you deserved it (2416)

On 04/27/2012 at 9:04pm - intimacy - by yosenfal (man) - United Kingdom (Plymouth)

Today, I found out the guy I've been crushing on for many years thinks he's a werewolf. FML

#19536972
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19003) - you deserved it (3090)

On 04/27/2012 at 11:24am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that my fellow marching band mates all refer to me as the "short girl with big tits" because none of them can remember my name. FML

#19536517
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18172) - you deserved it (2897)

On 04/27/2012 at 8:04am - misc - by noname (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was worried about my brother because he said that his new medication was making him hallucinate. I told him he should see a doctor right away. He said it was fine and that he had already seen a doctor. I later found out the doctor he was talking about was a hallucination. FML

#19536164
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17500) - you deserved it (1467)

On 04/27/2012 at 4:22am - health - by PickedOff (woman) - United States

Today, while putting on a load of laundry, I squeezed the detergent bottle and it made a noise like a woman's orgasm. After laughing, I realised that I'm probably too immature to be washing my own clothes. FML

#19521311
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6659) - you deserved it (15198)

On 04/24/2012 at 10:03am - intimacy - by mmmtortilla (woman) - Spain (Pais Vasco)

Today, while putting on a load of laundry, I squeezed the detergent bottle and it made a noise like a woman's orgasm. After laughing, I realised that I'm probably too immature to be washing my own clothes. FML

#19521311
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6659) - you deserved it (15198)

On 04/24/2012 at 10:03am - intimacy - by mmmtortilla (woman) - Spain (Pais Vasco)

Today, I yet again heard a friend say "YOLO" as if it's a word. It was so annoying that I had to restrain myself from punching him in the face and offering him the chance to suck on one of my turds, since apparently "YOLO." FML

#19520181
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13436) - you deserved it (3345)

On 04/24/2012 at 12:44am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, due to nervousness, I threw up while proposing to my girlfriend. FML

#19515625
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26359) - you deserved it (2316)

On 04/23/2012 at 5:51am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I met my girlfriend's mom. She went on about how my girlfriend's dad is a no good drunk, following this statement with spilling her fifth glass of wine. FML

#19515132
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14827) - you deserved it (1129)

On 04/23/2012 at 1:50am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, while I was in the midst of the most mind-blowing shower sex ever, the fire alarm went off. My girlfriend had left the stove top on and the entire kitchen had caught on fire. So instead of finishing, I frantically ran around naked trying to douse the flames. FML

#19484170
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19997) - you deserved it (2641)

On 04/17/2012 at 2:13pm - intimacy - by blocked_by_fire (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was looking through my Internet browsing history. Apparently my wife had searched "How to have an affair without getting caught". FML

#19484156
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29881) - you deserved it (1912)

On 04/17/2012 at 2:11pm - love - by Jason199615 - United States (Missouri)

Today, I held up my best friend with a lighter shaped like a gun, and jokingly accused him of sleeping with my wife, only to have him admit that he really did. FML

#19477249
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38216) - you deserved it (3720)

On 04/16/2012 at 4:12am - intimacy - by oface13 (man) - United States

Today, I introduced my Spanish friend to a girl I've had a crush on for a long time. Because he only spoke Spanish and she only spoke English, I was the translator. The first thing he said to her was, "You are really pretty." I translated it as "I like other men." Later, they found out. FML

#19470748
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6794) - you deserved it (28772)

On 04/15/2012 at 2:49am - love - by needurlove (man) - United States (Idaho)

Today, it was my 16th birthday. My suprise was a new car, that is now in the side of the garage because my mom lost control while driving it around front. FML

#19464550
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17457) - you deserved it (2729)

On 04/14/2012 at 12:57am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I surprised my daughter by telling her that I'm going to treat the family to a trip to the Himalayas in a few months. She promptly threw a tantrum and listed her main reasons for not wanting us to go: "It's a freaking desert there," and, "I'll miss the new Spiderman movie." FML

#19463259
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16844) - you deserved it (2611)

On 04/13/2012 at 9:01pm - kids - by neverakid (man) - United States



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